"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt
For 7 years - since dday - I have been in such pain that it is hard to breathe. Sometimes I scream when I'm in my car alone. My marriage is over - has been for years - but noone has left.
There have been many instances of issues with our kids. Each of them have challenges from their birth mother's addictions during pregnancy. One went to a program for troubled teens for a year. I can't express how hard that was for me. Now my youngest is in a wilderness program for drug addiction and legal issues.
My mom is 90 and very ill. She has days where we don't expect her to live, then she bounces back and has a good few days.
At this point, my WH does not speak to me unless I speak to him. I don't believe he cares if I live or die. His example has been contagious and now my 2 sons at home don't speak to me either. They all act as if I don't exist. I came home a few minutes ago from being at my mother's house all weekend, and noone spoke as I came in the door.
I don't mean to be having a pity party, but this is just TOO MUCH. I am beginning to resent everyone at my home. I don't like them any more. I don't want to be here. I have nowhere to go. I am so lonely. Everyone I know associates me with my family. I want to move away. I am 60 years old. I have no job - no money.
I read all the brave and strong stories of leaving and I get so excited for those who are escaping the hell - but I don't see any way out.
It is literally killing me to be around people who don't care about me.
Thanks for listening.
I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy