There are two things I cant seem to get over, and I am still in disbelief to the point where I am waiting for someone to yell"gotcha" at me like its some big joke tho I know its not.
1. how this could of happened, that she could sleep with someone her mothers age, I know this guy we are in a small town and he is a true loser.Of all people this guy, I thought I knew my wife and this is the farthest thing from her "type" its not even funny
2. She never showed any signs of unhappiness or even signs that anything was going on everything even during the month long affair was great with her and I.
I want to work things out with her and move on but the fact she went for some loser, and the fact we were getting along so great has me wondering if or when se will do it again.
You need to see a lawyer asap and know all your rights and responsibilities.
From what you said I am assuming she is prego with the other man's kid?
She is really broken sorry DNA test is a must.
Then you should start The 180 - you will find it in The Healing Library.
Is she showing genuine remorse over what she has done, or just regret that she was caught (and what a way to get caught).
ednogg, you do not need to make any decisions right away. There are going to be more revelations to come about her actions. Please consider seeing a therapist, demand she see one as well..........and then you can determine if MC will work for you.
Sorry you're here. Good luck!
If you believe the condom broke then I've got a bridge to sell you in Brooklyn. She is lying by minimizing.
If you've decide you an to work things out you have surrendered to her. You don't know the truth about number of A's she has had. You know she's a liar. What is she offering you. Where are the signs of genuine remorse? At least she's not sticking you with 18 years of paying for he fun
[This message edited by Schadenfreude at 6:58 AM, July 7th (Monday)]
That's why you don't dive in to R. You cannot win her heart by being Mr Nice Guy. If you unconditionally agree to R, she has no incentive to find out why she had this A in the first place. And without that knowledge,,she will,react the same way the next time temptation arises. To your serious detriment.
You need to study and figure out what your minimum requirements are before you'll consider R, figure out the consequences if she ignores them, and communicate these to,her in plain, unemotional English. If she agrees, then you have to watch her actions, not just listen to,her words. Then you can rationally decide if it's worthwhile to attempt R. And remember, as has been said countless,times here before, your old marriage is dead. You may get a new version, but it's way to early to know,that now.
An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones (Proverbs 12:4)
The fact is that age really does not matter. What matters is how she was feeling. When someone feels bad about themselves and need that validation they are willing to get the validation from anyone willing to give it
That is another story though. Your WW is most likely in shock as well. Is the fact the says she is pregnant proven, have you confirmed this?
I would not believe a single word she says at this time.
And like all others have said, you have to talk to a lawyer now. God knows what she really wants. And many times the OM wants something.
Since you have no idea what is really going on here, a lawyer will know how to protect you.
What has her mom say about this? I would think everyone is in shock with this.