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Newest Member: silenceisnotgold (46036)

User Topic: Sex without the ex
WeepingBuddhist
♀ 39139
Member # 39139
Default  Posted: 10:45 AM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I just wanted to call him up and yell at him for being such a shitty lover the last few years. Being with someone who was interested in MY pleasure as much as his own was just fantastic!


Me: BS 46
Him: unimportant
D Day:4-27-13
DIVORCED!!! 2-20-14

Posts: 676 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Columbus
brokeninfl
♀ 21896
Member # 21896
Default  Posted: 10:50 AM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I can certainly understand the impulse (and I hope to have that impulse someday myself)

Woot! for "fantastic"


"On the other side of fear lies freedom"

Me - 36 BS
Him - doesn't matter
2 DS
DD 11/08
Divorced.


Posts: 1074 | Registered: Dec 2008
WeepingBuddhist
♀ 39139
Member # 39139
Default  Posted: 10:56 AM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

thanks. I had lunch with a friend and I was like, getting divorced was the best thing that ever happened to me! If someone had told me that I would even consider thinking that a year ago, I would have said s/he had lost his/her fucking mind.


Me: BS 46
Him: unimportant
D Day:4-27-13
DIVORCED!!! 2-20-14

Posts: 676 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Columbus
brokeninfl
♀ 21896
Member # 21896
Default  Posted: 12:41 PM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

getting divorced was the best thing that ever happened to me! If someone had told me that I would even consider thinking that a year ago, I would have said s/he had lost his/her fucking mind

I feel the exact same way. 100%.


"On the other side of fear lies freedom"

Me - 36 BS
Him - doesn't matter
2 DS
DD 11/08
Divorced.


Posts: 1074 | Registered: Dec 2008
WeepingBuddhist
♀ 39139
Member # 39139
Default  Posted: 1:26 PM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

oooo, I love your sig file! sooo sooo true!!!


Me: BS 46
Him: unimportant
D Day:4-27-13
DIVORCED!!! 2-20-14

Posts: 676 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Columbus
IrishGirlVA
♀ 39694
Member # 39694
Default  Posted: 1:45 PM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My ex was pretty good at taking care of my needs physically but my desire is to find someone who takes care of those post-coital needs. You know, the snuggling afterwards as opposed to getting up for dinner leftovers or rolling over and letting out a fart.

Congrats on finding a selfless lover!

[This message edited by IrishGirlVA at 1:46 PM, July 8th (Tuesday)]


Me, the "B": 42yo
Him, the "W": 38yo
DDay: June 2013
Status: Over

Posts: 370 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Virginia
Williesmom
♀ 22870
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 2:28 PM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My wxh would be reaching for his pack of cigarettes while he was still inside me.

He had also been known to use my ass and back as a coffee table for his beer can during sex.

I kid you not.


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7866 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
IrishGirlVA
♀ 39694
Member # 39694
Default  Posted: 2:55 PM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He had also been known to use my ass and back as a coffee table for his beer can during sex.

Ummm....wow!


Me, the "B": 42yo
Him, the "W": 38yo
DDay: June 2013
Status: Over

Posts: 370 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Virginia
asurvivor
♂ 32368
Member # 32368
Default  Posted: 3:02 PM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He had also been known to use my ass and back as a coffee table for his beer can during sex.

Wow is right. That was hard to read,just horrible. I can't imagine how messed up that guy was.


I've wiped the shit off. It can be wiped off you know.



Posts: 587 | Registered: Jun 2011
WeepingBuddhist
♀ 39139
Member # 39139
Default  Posted: 3:04 PM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

yeah, reading other people's stories, I know I got off easy.


LOL...now I've got the giggles.

Williesmom, your ex sounds like a right piece of garbage. Glad you're rid of him.


Me: BS 46
Him: unimportant
D Day:4-27-13
DIVORCED!!! 2-20-14

Posts: 676 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Columbus
Williesmom
♀ 22870
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 7:04 PM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Meh. It was the best 200 lb weight loss ever.

Thanks guys. I just look back on my past and shake my head. I can't believe I ever put up with that shit.


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7866 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
SBB
♀ 35229
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 7:20 PM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

getting divorced was the best thing that ever happened to me! If someone had told me that I would even consider thinking that a year ago, I would have said s/he had lost his/her fucking mind

A-men. On DD I told him he didn't know it yet but he had just made the biggest mistake of his life. AND I didn't know it yet but he just did me the biggest favour of my life.

I sure do know it now.

He had also been known to use my ass and back as a coffee table for his beer can during sex.


What a fucking pig.

He sure did set the bar low. The sad clown did too. All onwards and upwards here now though.

The first time I was touched after S was electric - I thought it was because it had been a little while and then it happened again. Ah, THIS is what it's like when someone doesn't think your genitals are your only erogenous zone.

It's amazing the shit we'll tolerate or go without - it has to be Stockholm Syndrome.


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5734 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
phmh
♀ 34146
Member # 34146
Default  Posted: 7:20 PM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes, selfish people (cheaters) tend to be terrible, selfish lovers.

WXH had been my only, so I always liked sex well enough, but I had no idea what I was missing out on. Yet another positive side benefit of his cheating -- I would have gone through life without ever having amazing sex!


Me: BW, divorced, now fabulous and happy!

Married: 11 years, no kids

Character is destiny


Posts: 3538 | Registered: Dec 2011
miadianna
♀ 10516
Member # 10516
Default  Posted: 10:13 PM, July 8th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You know that saying: "You don't know what you've got till it's gone?" Well sometimes you do. And you're thankful it left. Someone else's problem now, I'm free.

"You don't know what you're missing until it arrives."


Me: BS 53
Son: 27 years old
Daughter: 25 years old
D-day(s) 9/23/94 - 1/31/05
Divorced 4/10/08

Posts: 7486 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Illinois
WeepingBuddhist
♀ 39139
Member # 39139
Default  Posted: 8:50 AM, July 9th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

oooo, another good one: you don't know what you're missing until it arrives. I LIKE IT!


Me: BS 46
Him: unimportant
D Day:4-27-13
DIVORCED!!! 2-20-14

Posts: 676 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Columbus
Mormegil
♂ 34841
Member # 34841
Default  Posted: 4:37 PM, July 9th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Confirmed...yup my cheating exwife was also a pretty lazy/selfish lover.

My new girlfriend...omg...she's wonderful! I'm completely spoiled.


Me: BH 38
DDay 10.18.2011
Divorced.
DD: 11 yrs old
Dating someone new now.

Posts: 52 | Registered: Feb 2012
DepressedDaddy
♂ 41521
Member # 41521
Default  Posted: 10:45 AM, July 10th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I completely agree with the whole being happy after D/S. I also agree that if you would have told me that I would be happy about it last Nov/Dec, I would have argued with you until I was blue in the face.

I look at my life as a single person now and am thankful (in a weird way) for what happened. When I think about my STBX now, I just feel sorry for her in some ways. I am just happy. I didn't realize the toll our post-A life was taking on me. I can say all this now and it is strange. New friends, new relationships, new experiences all have different meaning to me now. My life has definitely discovered a newly-defined purpose.

Holy shit - I can't believe I'm here.

WB - I'm so happy you found someone that wants you for you and is willing to show that any way he can.


Since D I have become DDaddy 2.0 - or better known as DevotedDaddy

“Optimism is a strategy for making a better future. Because unless you believe that the future can be better, you are unlikely to step up and take responsibility for making it so."


Posts: 916 | Registered: Dec 2013
WeepingBuddhist
♀ 39139
Member # 39139
Default  Posted: 1:54 PM, July 10th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I feel like I should thank the skank for getting me free. I just want to go over to JFO and be like, RUN, GIRL, RUN!!!


Me: BS 46
Him: unimportant
D Day:4-27-13
DIVORCED!!! 2-20-14

Posts: 676 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Columbus
cmego
♀ 30346
Member # 30346
Default  Posted: 2:42 PM, July 10th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My ex was gay. It could only go up from there.

Pun intended.


me...BS, 44 years old, 2 small kids
WS, 41, multiple gay affairs
M 15 years, together 17
Divorced


Posts: 4283 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: South
risingfromashes
♀ 3903
Member # 3903
Default  Posted: 4:34 PM, July 10th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes, selfish people (cheaters) tend to be terrible, selfish lovers
.
Yes to that! I ran into his post-divorce girlfriend who had dumped his ass. When he told her he had been treated for SA (porn only he said) she thought that it meant he would be great in bed. She was really disappointed.
Of course! Being a sex addict means that it is all about them. You just happened to be there to make him happy!

He had also been known to use my ass and back as a coffee table for his beer can during sex.

Makes me want to kick a beer can up his ass.
Sorry for the graphic language. It is just a reflection of how outraged I am. Glad you are free!

I am glad for you WB and for all of us who have found out how much better it is to be here instead of there.


There is a wonderful life on the other side of hell.

Posts: 1730 | Registered: Mar 2004
Topic Posts: 23
Pages: 1 · 2

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