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WeepingBuddhist posted 7/8/2014 10:45 AM

I just wanted to call him up and yell at him for being such a shitty lover the last few years. Being with someone who was interested in MY pleasure as much as his own was just fantastic!

brokeninfl posted 7/8/2014 10:50 AM

I can certainly understand the impulse (and I hope to have that impulse someday myself)

Woot! for "fantastic"

WeepingBuddhist posted 7/8/2014 10:56 AM

thanks. I had lunch with a friend and I was like, getting divorced was the best thing that ever happened to me! If someone had told me that I would even consider thinking that a year ago, I would have said s/he had lost his/her fucking mind.

brokeninfl posted 7/8/2014 12:41 PM

getting divorced was the best thing that ever happened to me! If someone had told me that I would even consider thinking that a year ago, I would have said s/he had lost his/her fucking mind

I feel the exact same way. 100%.

WeepingBuddhist posted 7/8/2014 13:26 PM

oooo, I love your sig file! sooo sooo true!!!

IrishGirlVA posted 7/8/2014 13:45 PM

My ex was pretty good at taking care of my needs physically but my desire is to find someone who takes care of those post-coital needs. You know, the snuggling afterwards as opposed to getting up for dinner leftovers or rolling over and letting out a fart.

Congrats on finding a selfless lover!

[This message edited by IrishGirlVA at 1:46 PM, July 8th (Tuesday)]

Williesmom posted 7/8/2014 14:28 PM

My wxh would be reaching for his pack of cigarettes while he was still inside me.

He had also been known to use my ass and back as a coffee table for his beer can during sex.

I kid you not.

IrishGirlVA posted 7/8/2014 14:55 PM

He had also been known to use my ass and back as a coffee table for his beer can during sex.

Ummm....wow!

asurvivor posted 7/8/2014 15:02 PM

He had also been known to use my ass and back as a coffee table for his beer can during sex.

Wow is right. That was hard to read,just horrible. I can't imagine how messed up that guy was.

WeepingBuddhist posted 7/8/2014 15:04 PM

yeah, reading other people's stories, I know I got off easy.


LOL...now I've got the giggles.

Williesmom, your ex sounds like a right piece of garbage. Glad you're rid of him.

Williesmom posted 7/8/2014 19:04 PM

Meh. It was the best 200 lb weight loss ever.

Thanks guys. I just look back on my past and shake my head. I can't believe I ever put up with that shit.

SBB posted 7/8/2014 19:20 PM

getting divorced was the best thing that ever happened to me! If someone had told me that I would even consider thinking that a year ago, I would have said s/he had lost his/her fucking mind

A-men. On DD I told him he didn't know it yet but he had just made the biggest mistake of his life. AND I didn't know it yet but he just did me the biggest favour of my life.

I sure do know it now.

He had also been known to use my ass and back as a coffee table for his beer can during sex.


What a fucking pig.

He sure did set the bar low. The sad clown did too. All onwards and upwards here now though.

The first time I was touched after S was electric - I thought it was because it had been a little while and then it happened again. Ah, THIS is what it's like when someone doesn't think your genitals are your only erogenous zone.

It's amazing the shit we'll tolerate or go without - it has to be Stockholm Syndrome.

phmh posted 7/8/2014 19:20 PM

Yes, selfish people (cheaters) tend to be terrible, selfish lovers.

WXH had been my only, so I always liked sex well enough, but I had no idea what I was missing out on. Yet another positive side benefit of his cheating -- I would have gone through life without ever having amazing sex!

miadianna posted 7/8/2014 22:13 PM

You know that saying: "You don't know what you've got till it's gone?" Well sometimes you do. And you're thankful it left. Someone else's problem now, I'm free.

"You don't know what you're missing until it arrives."

WeepingBuddhist posted 7/9/2014 08:50 AM

oooo, another good one: you don't know what you're missing until it arrives. I LIKE IT!

Mormegil posted 7/9/2014 16:37 PM

Confirmed...yup my cheating exwife was also a pretty lazy/selfish lover.

My new girlfriend...omg...she's wonderful! I'm completely spoiled.

DepressedDaddy posted 7/10/2014 10:45 AM

I completely agree with the whole being happy after D/S. I also agree that if you would have told me that I would be happy about it last Nov/Dec, I would have argued with you until I was blue in the face.

I look at my life as a single person now and am thankful (in a weird way) for what happened. When I think about my STBX now, I just feel sorry for her in some ways. I am just happy. I didn't realize the toll our post-A life was taking on me. I can say all this now and it is strange. New friends, new relationships, new experiences all have different meaning to me now. My life has definitely discovered a newly-defined purpose.

Holy shit - I can't believe I'm here.

WB - I'm so happy you found someone that wants you for you and is willing to show that any way he can.

WeepingBuddhist posted 7/10/2014 13:54 PM

I feel like I should thank the skank for getting me free. I just want to go over to JFO and be like, RUN, GIRL, RUN!!!

cmego posted 7/10/2014 14:42 PM

My ex was gay. It could only go up from there.

Pun intended.

risingfromashes posted 7/10/2014 16:34 PM

Yes, selfish people (cheaters) tend to be terrible, selfish lovers
.
Yes to that! I ran into his post-divorce girlfriend who had dumped his ass. When he told her he had been treated for SA (porn only he said) she thought that it meant he would be great in bed. She was really disappointed.
Of course! Being a sex addict means that it is all about them. You just happened to be there to make him happy!

He had also been known to use my ass and back as a coffee table for his beer can during sex.

Makes me want to kick a beer can up his ass.
Sorry for the graphic language. It is just a reflection of how outraged I am. Glad you are free!

I am glad for you WB and for all of us who have found out how much better it is to be here instead of there.

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