I'm not a WW, and my situation is different from your fww but I'll add my answers if it'll help you in any way:
Did your BH leave you?
- bBF wanted NC for one week and gradually spoke with me more (once a week until a month later where we spoke almost every day)
- He's in limbo right now
Did you ever realize the full impact of what you did and how it affected your whole family?
- Yes, towards the end of the A and definitely after DDay the impact gradually dawned on me. I think now I'm seeing the full picture (almost a year after the end of the A)
Were you ever able to feel true remorse and communicate that to your BH?
- I am remorseful and I can trust that assessment because the reasons for me to never do that again aren't only about him but also about me and the need to honour myself for my own well-being and happiness.
Did you have to hit rock bottom to realize that you lost the man who loved you unconditionally and wanted to R?
- How he handled himself after DDay made me realize he truly does love me in the crazy love way. Any other person would have seen the easy route is to leave but it takes an amazing person to want to stay for good reasons. It makes me more determined to prove to him that our future is worth this heartache and pain.
Were you able to R after separation?
- We're still in limbo.
I feel my W truly wants to be IL with me again, but has come to the conclusion she's gotta fix herself before she can fully commit to helping me heal. She feels the limbo is unfair to me & our 2 boys.
If she's honest about that then good for her for knowing her limitations. Is she in counseling?
Would you rather she be there in limbo with you rather than leave to take care of herself first? She's got to know that choosing to leave might mean never being able to return by your side though. Conversely choosing to stay in limbo still doesn't mean reconciliation for the both of you either...I think this is why it's hard for me as a wayward to own the idea of letting go of the outcome.