It just seemed like there's been a lot of hopelessness posts lately.
I know full well the feelings of panic, dread, worry, self-pity.. you name it. I felt like my life was over and I was just a walking shell of a person, going through the motions of merely existing.
I had lied to her to spare myself and prevent our marriage from being over if she ever did find out.
Well, what a surprise, she found out.
She was devastated. I've never had more sheer horror in my life; the sudden realization that I was capable of hurting the people I profess to love. It's easy to let it consume you, and then come in here and let everyone else's horror stories drag you down as well.
Every situation is different, but it's ok to have hope. Even if you think your situation isn't going to work out. Hope that your efforts now are going to pay off for you individually even if they don't for you as a couple. And if you haven't made any effort and you're still wallowing (you know who you are), then I invite you to start making the effort.
"But I don't know what to do or how to do it?"
Here's where I hand you the imaginary shovel.
And while you're digging inside of yourself, come up out of that pit every once in a while for a break and cold glass of lemonade.
There are things worth living for. Simpler things. Finer things. Peaceful things.
Despair not, ye remorseful lost souls who are here to better themselves. It's not you who I worry about. It's the unremorseful ones who still don't "get it". But they're not here for us to talk sense into. They're still out there hurting themselves and others.
A moment of silence for them.
I'm glad I could brighten the day for some of you.
We lost souls are a compassionate bunch. I love being here amongst you imperfect humans. We're still capable of love, and there's a lot of it here. Stick around and you'll see.
Now go heal yourself, and fix yourself, and come back and report on how much better you're doing and be ready to give support to those who are still struggling. Sometimes all it takes is a good ear and a kind word.