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just my imagination?

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hihn posted 7/11/2014 22:18 PM

After reading so many stories of discovery day I have come to believe the number one way for a cheater to get caught is through texting? Am I right? My WH during his A even asked me "does it bother you that O_ _ _ & I text so much?". To which I replied "should it?". Just a few days after that he made the mistake of leaving his cell phone on the desk & she texted him. The text was in response to them previously making plans to moving her in as soon as I moved out. Those two morons actually thought they were going to live together in the house I bought, in the better of the two houses that I owned. The smaller house wasn't good enough for her. I texted her back, you will never come within 20 feet of any property I own. My WH was a minimal contributor when it came to financial, emotional or physical support in any thing for us as a couple. It started 25 years ago & just got worse through the years. But he loved bragging to others that he owned 2 houses. For which he only paid 1/2 of the mortgage on one of the houses, and half of the utility bills for one houses. Repairs, improvements, furniture, you name it I paid for. I got the pleasure of paying for everything else. Now I get to pay for his crappy choice in women too. The OW has stalker tendencies. Is a considerably stupid, money grubbing, warped, NPD, HO with sadomasochistic tendencies & expensive tastes. A sex addicts dream come true. I could groan on for some time about how intentionally absent he was in the financial department & many other departments, but I will spare the other details for now. FYI I just sold the other house two days ago. When we decided to R that was one of the first matters I decided take care of. Only one house to try and take from me in the future, should it not work out, & that feels good During my first individual PTSD session my counselor said after telling her about what he put me through in past 25 years (of which I was just scratching the surface)" you are a very faithful person aren't you?". I wasn't sure where she was trying to head with that but the thought of it was scaring the crap out me. I put up with the emotional abuse because I was faithful, maybe I was just a nave idiot? There is more, so much more that he said & did to my face & behind my back all these years. I wear myself out thinking about it. But on the brighter side he has turned over a new leaf, is genuinely remorseful, trying his best to earn my trust back and contributing to everything in our life together. In case any of you are wondering, no I am not into porno, S&M, OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT! How I was so lucky to end up with a secretive sex & porno addictive I have yet to figure out. Perhaps some day I will.

Ostrich80 posted 7/12/2014 00:46 AM

My ws and ow started texting over the team he coached, her kid was on the team. It graduated to sexting soon after, then pix, then pa. I caught him by seeing the boatload of texts shooting between them 8 hrs a day. So to answer your question, in my case, definitely.

hihn posted 7/12/2014 02:54 AM

Let's make a pact not to tell the cheaters out there that they shouldn't text about there cheating, because it seems to be the number one way to get caught. Let's let the bloody fools have their false sense of security/secrecy. Mawhahahaha....

NeverAgain2013 posted 7/12/2014 06:31 AM

I'd get down to a lawyer PRONTO and have a post-nuptial document drawn up that doesn't entitle this guy to a box of saltines in the event of a divorce.

You've lost far too much already.

mamazen posted 7/12/2014 13:19 PM

Do we have the same WH? Coasted on me financially forever, now wants everything. Porn addict, and I recently learned he likes blow jobs from men, and has probably been doing this the entire marriage. Didn't realize there was a mold for these kinds of guys. I'm sending you compassion vibes. Good luck.

hihn posted 7/12/2014 15:33 PM

OMG mamazen

Mine did the anonymous sex membership thing, plus prostitutes, and 2 co-workers. One of the anonymous sex dates ended up being a male dressed in drag. Who promised WH he would introduce him to his sister for anonymous sex if my WH would let him give my WH a BJ. Of course my risk taking WH agreed but claims he didn't like it and got pissed at the guy because WH never did get to meet the sister. Sometimes I think I am still in shock over sheer numbers of sex partners he had & what all he did with them. Yet some how I didn't get a STD. That's a miracle in & of itself. Thank you Jesus.

Nature_Girl posted 7/12/2014 15:39 PM

My ex hid his sexual preferences from me as well. I am not into porn, young girls, rape, anal rape, or being urinated on. How in the world did I end up with him? He lied to me. Plain & simple.

918Mama posted 7/12/2014 15:57 PM

Mine asked "does it bother you that OW and I are Facebook friends??"

I said "nah. I trust you."

Not sure which of us was the bigger idiot.

hihn posted 7/12/2014 16:53 PM


Have looked into the I can relate forum?
Topic: Spouses/Partners of Sex Addicts-13

Vulcanized posted 7/12/2014 17:00 PM

I caught XH thru text.

OW's pet name for my H: swamp nuts. Sums it all up, huh?

Ostrich80 posted 7/12/2014 20:59 PM

OW's pet name for my H: swamp nuts


whattheh posted 7/12/2014 21:19 PM

My fWH was sly and told OW not to text and not to phone. They communicated mostly by email.

OW occasionally broke the rules and texted and called when she wanted reach him more quickly though I later learned.

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