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HeBrokeVows posted 7/12/2014 22:12 PM

Mom just called to read me the letter. Return address was a po box (some may remember he won't tell me where he lives). It basically was business like with an apology and hoping to talk to me. In our ethnic background, its not unusual to go through the parents. He wrote me a few days ago saying he made a mistake and wants to air things out and talk. Crickets I did.

But this still kills. Now I think to myself am I deprivingy kids of the chance to have him back? And my reality sets in and I say to myself this man is horrible what he did to us.

His financials and interrogatories are past due and I think he wants to chat to see if any chance at R. If not, he may just tell me what I'm about to see in the financials. He doesn't know that I already know most of it and the secret life he was living.

MissMouseMo posted 7/13/2014 00:21 AM

Keep giving him crickets.

You may straddle two cultures, but I don't trust he's thinking of what will benefit you so I urge you to be very cautious, not generous.

He is apologizing and trying to win you back but he won't let you know where he lives?? Yeah, that's the way to build trust.

peridot posted 7/13/2014 00:28 AM

He doesn't sound like someone who wants to R. Keep moving forward and keep up the crickets.

Kajem posted 7/13/2014 07:56 AM

If he has something to say to you, can't he say it in a letter and send it?

Just a thought that came to mind.

Hugs,
K

Ailanthus posted 7/13/2014 10:19 AM

My WXH did the same thing. The result was that my parents evidently have given him a 'pass,' so to speak. I have reminded them that I never got a letter.

I don't know what to suggest. In my case, I think that his attempts to maintain contact with my family were manipulative. It wasn't about healing and repairing the rupture. It was about making him look better.

Hugs to you no matter what you decide.