I am sorry he continues to be selfish and hurts you over and over again. I am sending hugs, thoughts and prayers.
It was eating him up in what way? What does he want? Did he convey this to you? Again, he is treating you and your feelings like a yo-yo.
Your WH has been living a double life for a long time.
The "whore" is part of the equation but remember you did not take your vows with her. You took them with your WH. He is the one that owes you truth, honesty and commitment. He has broken his vows to you over and over again.
It is normal to want to strike out at the OW (Lord knows I did and mentally still do) but focus your hurt and anger where it should be directed. At your WH.
This stops when you say it stops.
Know that we are here. We are rooting you on and that you are not alone.
Many hugs. Take care of YOU. That is all you should do right now. You can't fix him.
[This message edited by 1Faith at 6:14 PM, July 14th (Monday)]