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Newest Member: Katie191 (61867)

User Topic: he abused my
♀ 40859
Member # 40859
Default  Posted: 5:46 AM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I need to vent so I hope you dont mind. I am so upset and about to have a fight and a half with my ex. My 9 year old and 7 year old came home last night from being at asshole house for 12 days for their 2 week summer vacation. He just got unsupervised visitation in May which of.course was not my choice and I fought like hell to get no visits. While my kids called me from there each night, it was a 2 minute conversation on speaker phone and they kept saying they were having a blast. When they got home last night I was MORTIFIED to learn my kids were abused by BOTH asshole and his mother. I am filing kidnapping charges, neglect, and cruelty to kids here around 9 am once i get a sitter for kids. I feel like I have failed my kids and i have never in a million years thought he or his mom would treat my kids like this. He was physically abusive towards me, but always verbal and mental abusive to us all. However the abuse my kids endured is horrible. If they do not arrest him AND his mother they will place me under the jail.

My 7 year oldd daughter got a serious bad cut on the bottom of her foot. So bad it needed stitches. He got her no medical attention and she said he just laughed at her everytime she begged for a doctor. She cut it on a rock in a river he let them play in. The cut has been opened for 3 days and is infected. As they were getting ready to leave because she was being a "baby" according my son, he left her on side of major highway and told my son they were going to teach her a "lesson" and they drove around the corner and my daughter was wondering in the middle.of the street crying her eyes out and not able to walk hardly due to her cut. My son said he was also afraid for her that she was going to get hit. Her foot is bad infected and i had to take her to quick care as she got in my car at 730. Then his mom used a hickory switch WITH thorns and hit my 9 year old with it across his face, arms, chest back and legs and he bled from some of them. Then she hit my daughter across her back and legs and she bled too. Then he took them MISSISSIPPI on the 4th (we are in Georgia) and spent the night in a hotel. He told them if they told me anything about leaving the state they would get spankings with a belt. He is not allowed to leave the state as he is on probation and he is NOT to be traveling with my kids. He wouldn't let my daughter call me when she was upset and he snd his mom told her she wasnt allowed to speak to her mom.

I am so upset and so lost right now. I just want to take justice in my own hands but i know i need let police do it.

I am going to call around 9 to report. Please pray for me that i will get justice for my kids....i have done nothibg but cry so bad all night and have no one to talk to.

Tht is not all that happened but that is enough

I am a basket case.

Thanks for always being there. :(

Posts: 111 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Georgia
♀ 12580
Member # 12580
Default  Posted: 6:21 AM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Nail his ass teeghan.... A coward like that doesn't deserve those precious babes of yours. I think it shows huge amounts of courage and what a truly great mom you are that they came to you...

I know you will keep them safe, even if that means keeping that monster and his evil monstrosity of a mom away from them.

(((((teeghan and kids)))))

♥ Me: 31

♥ HiM: 32

♥ Married: 11 years

♥Kids: 10 year old DS 7 year old DD 5 year old DS♥

Posts: 473 | Registered: Nov 2006 | From: NY
♂ 37455
Member # 37455
Default  Posted: 6:59 AM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Hope this guy gets exactly what's coming to him!!!! Pissed for you, almost deranged about what he did to the kids.

Nail his ass! You've got incontrovertible physical proof.

Prayers sent.

BH 53, WW 45
DS 25(Mine),SD 24,SS 23(Hers),DS 12 Ours, DGS 6, DGD 2
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 13yrs
I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.
― Sophocles, Antigone

Posts: 5562 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
♀ 21101
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 7:10 AM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Give those kids extra hugs. That was very brave of them to tell you what happened. If they have any marks still of the abuse they sustained please photograph it with a time/date stamp, so you can use it as proof.

Good luck with your call today. I hope your DD foot is feeling better. Poor Kiddo, also if you got a note from the Dr you saw use it. Get a ROI from the facility you went to to get his notes, If the Dr documented anything that shows it should have been stitched, or wasn't cared for properly it will help your fight.

This asshat does not deserve to live. Let alone have children.

(((and strength today))))

Him: FWS
Kids: 18 & 20
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

Posts: 13435 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
♂ 42915
Member # 42915
Default  Posted: 7:17 AM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

teeghan. Screw his ass nail something else to the f'ing wall !! You didn't fail your kids the system did. You did everything possible to protect them. So keep your chin up and fight for them yet again. That's what good parents do. Your better than good, I believe that. I read your other posts, you suffered but stood your ground. You did not fail. You and your children were let down by others.

As a cop I have respect for the law. I don't always agree with them but I enforce them. You did all you could to prove what a POS he was. In my experience I often have to tell fathers to fight for their rights. But there is a difference. They are fathers not monsters.

So you do what you have to do. Fight him and prove he should never see your babies again.

[This message edited by SWAT70 at 7:45 AM, July 15th (Tuesday)]

Me-BH WW-39
DD-11 DS-6 DS-3
D day was Valentines day 2014. Talk about a trigger.

Posts: 343 | Registered: Mar 2014 | From: Down range
♀ 25001
Member # 25001
Default  Posted: 7:57 AM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Teeghan, I'm so sorry you and your kids have to still deal with him and his family.

That is my fear with my husband...that things will escalate.

Sending you and your precious children strength and (((HUGS))) to get through this.

You are strong. You are a good mother. You did NOT fail them.

Me - BS, 40 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS11, DD8
Getting my ducks in a row for divorce... finally (4+ D-Days too many - listed in profile.)

Posts: 6121 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: In the darkest depths of hell!
♂ 43101
Member # 43101
Default  Posted: 8:07 AM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Teeghan, document every single detail that you can. If you have video on your phone ask the children questions and allow them to answer while you record it. Report this immediately. Once you've done everything you can do you hold them babies close and make them feel safe like only you can do. Take the others advice and get all the medical documentation you can. Find out where they stayed out of state if you can. This POS is not a father - he's a f-----g coward and an abusive bully and he obviously come by it honestly because that scumbag he calls a mother is no better. I'm praying for you - stay strong

BH - 53
DDay - 4/4/14
Together 21 years
Completely Devastated and Trying Hard

Posts: 59 | Registered: Apr 2014 | From: NS Canada
♀ 33806
Member # 33806
Default  Posted: 8:20 AM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes, nail him..Tell the doc treating your daughter's infection that the child's injury was ignored while under your WH's care..Once a time window (about 8 hours after injury) is passed for getting stitches, cut will usually have to be treated with wet to dry dressing changes to clean and debride the cut..So it is possible you will have more than one doctor visit to treat this cut..If possible make this doctor who treats your daughter your ally..His word or statement may help you in your fight to get your WH to lose visitation..
I think your kiddos may both have to speak up as well..

Don't tie your happiness to the tail of somebody else's kite

60 years young..

Posts: 3929 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: Texas
♂ 35619
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 8:24 AM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Get the kids to a hospital and document everything. Contact his probation officer and pursue a PO against him. He threatened the kids regarding probation violation. Pursue that issue as well.

Posts: 4634 | Registered: May 2012
♀ 21101
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 8:27 AM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I just wanted to add there is a special spot in hell waiting for him, and his mother.

This makes me sick. YOU are quite the awesome woman though. YOU have become so strong. I really admire you.

((((and strength))))

Him: FWS
Kids: 18 & 20
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

Posts: 13435 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
♀ 41038
Member # 41038
Default  Posted: 8:28 AM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so so so sorry. You tried so hard to keep this pig away from your kids, and the courts just ignore all of it and hand them over to him and his obviously sick mother.

What possible reason would he have to drag them many hours away for one lousy night? That sounds so suspicious - like he was there to get something he shouldn't be getting - drugs, a weapon, something - but that's a hell of a drive for one night.

Definitely get the police and have them both arrested. I'd be trying like hell to find out why he had to go so far away too.

DDay - 12/2010
Fully R'd - I love my husband

Posts: 2246 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: East Coast
♀ 27428
Member # 27428
Default  Posted: 8:42 AM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Teeghan and kiddos)))

This is terrible. I'm glad you took your daughter to the doctor for 2 reasons. 1) Because your daughter obviously needed medical attention and 2) there needs to be a record of what happened which I should think would give your legal case more credence. Did you take your son to the doctor as well? I think I might do that too were I in your shoes, for the same reasons as above. Document everything your kids told you while it's fresh on your mind.

Disclaimer: I'm no attorney, so please listen to the advice of your attorney over any advice I gave you.

Contact his probation officer and pursue a PO against him. He threatened the kids regarding probation violation. Pursue that issue as well.

This too.

Good luck as you navigate this mess. Hug your babies extra close.


Posts: 1830 | Registered: Feb 2010
Long Gone
♂ 32587
Member # 32587
Default  Posted: 12:14 PM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

nuke that piece of shit

Dday 11/2010

Posts: 785 | Registered: Jun 2011
♀ 35812
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 2:36 PM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so bloody angry that I'm surprise that my keyboard isn't combusting. Believe me, I'll be praying that you nail his ass to the wall. Bastard. Utter bastard, and I mean that literally since I'm sure that his bitch of a mother isn't too damned sure of who his father is.

Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012

Posts: 10199 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
♂ 42012
Member # 42012
Default  Posted: 3:12 PM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WTH? FTG!!!!

Most importantly I hope your kids are ok. I'm so sorry that your kids had to go through this. Saying this is a major tragedy that they were treated like this is an understatement.

I hope you nail his ass to the wall and he gets exactly whats coming to him and your xMIL.

Lastly, know that this is not your fault and I think SWAT put it best, the system failed them. Not you.


"I remind myself of this. I am a survivor. I have taken all this world has dished out and am still here. So there is no reason to be afraid. Whatever happens, I will survive. So now onto living. It is time for me to thrive." - DrJekyll

Posts: 4487 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Northeast US
♂ 42967
Member # 42967
Default  Posted: 3:15 PM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Can you pursue your X for depraved indifference regarding your kids? You and your attorney might be able to make that kind of charge stick.

Not an attorney so just asking if that is an option.

I'm so very sorry. I should be but sometimes I'm just amazed at man's inhumanity to man. No parent should ever treat their kids that way! Seriously, WTF over?

ME - BH 45
Her - XWS 30
D - April 2010 - never looked back and good riddance.
Happily remarried!

Though much is taken, much abides; and though we are not now that strength which in old days
moved earth and heaven, that which we are, we are

Posts: 244 | Registered: Apr 2014
♀ 40144
Member # 40144
Default  Posted: 4:26 PM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

OMG, this is just horrific. I am so sorry you and your kids are being further hurt by this POS and his mother. I just don't understand how some people can utterly lack any bit of humanity. And I am completely disgusted by the system that insists that a pig like him get unsupervised access to his kids. I sincerely hope that you are able to turn this situation on him so that the "powers that be" start making some decent decisions to protect your children. It must be so sickening and heart-wrenching not to be able to protect your own children.

I'm so glad you got your DD to a doctor and agree with everyone on getting both their injuries documented and also videotaping their stories about the visit.

You are an amazingly strong woman and I know you will fight like a mama bear to protect your kids. Wishing you tons of strength and praying for the "people in the system" to see the light and care more about your kids than about his paternal "rights". Stay tough. Thank God your kids have you!

Me: BS49+ 😝, Him: WH 51
M 24 years - DD21 DS19 DS17
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday = 2/10/13, S for 1 year, now Reconciling

Posts: 1488 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: MidWest
solus sto
♀ 30989
Member # 30989
Default  Posted: 5:49 PM, July 15th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((teeghan)))I'm so sorry. I can't fathom harming a child, and am always taken aback by those who do.

That said, that the man from whom you had to hide, in a shelter, harmed your kids comes as little surprise. You worked hard to ensure this would not happen, and sadly the system did not help you protect them.

Hopefully that will change.

I'm glad you took your daughter to the doctor's. S/he is a mandated reporter; if you made him/her aware the injuries were the result of abuse, then CPS will become involved and that will help you keep the kids from him.

What else have you done? Have you photographed the injuries? Do so, and continue to as they heal (and change appearance). Contact your attorney. Reach out to the resources at the center where you stayed and got so very much support. And I'd also call the police. Both in your town and the town in which your ex lives, if he is somewhere else.

I am SO angry for you. You have been remarkably strong---more has been required of you than anyone should EVER have to deal with, and you've handled it so very well.

I am so, so sorry your poor babies have been hurt by this monster.

I hope you can nail his ass to the wall.

Being abused in prison sounds kind of like justice, to me.

BS-me, 55; WX-irrelevant
Divorced after an eternity
"So much for the past and present. The future is called 'perhaps,' which is the only possible thing to call the future. And the important thing is not to let that scare you." Tenn

Posts: 15349 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: midwest
♀ 17569
Member # 17569
Default  Posted: 8:04 PM, July 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hoping you are ok. Please give us an update.

me bs
him fws
19 years
OW was my best friend
2 amazing kids
finding happiness again
separation 12/27/07
let him come back 3/25/08
Just had our 25th anniversary.

Posts: 392 | Registered: Jan 2008
♀ 40859
Member # 40859
Default  Posted: 1:48 AM, July 19th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you all for support. I have been so upset all week. I went to poive Tuesday morning and filed reports against his mom and him.

His mom is on a cruise until next Saturday so she doesnt know she has to come in for questioning but she will when she returns home. I am going after her for cruelty to kids times two, battery times 2 and the detective mentioned possible simple assault x 2 as well.

Then him they are going after him for probabtion violation since he didnt have permission to leave state. Neglect and cruelty to kids x 2 and detective was going to see what else can be charged.

The detective was sick when i emailed him pictures. Keep in mind the hickory switch pics were taken 11 days after she hit them and the marks are still massive and deep and my son
Has over 25 marks from his face to his toes.

My kids have been telling me so much that i have broken down a lot this week as my heart hurts to know how.they were treated. I am not.going to stop until i get justice ad i.warned.the detective that i will.get

The special.victims out Tuesday to interview my kids and then we go from.there. I will.keep you posted please continue to keep us in your prayers. I need it and so do they. We are also counseling tomorrow at noon.

And yes doc did report this to cps and has written a sworn affidavit and it is in the detective hands as well

Posts: 111 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Georgia
Topic Posts: 86
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