The bouts of sadness are likely normal after an intimate betrayal.
I am two plus years out and I still get sad.
I think it has to do with the fact that I can't believe my life has become just another worn out cliche.
A woman married to a man who has an affair with a much younger woman.
I thought my marriage was good. I thought I had found and married a better man than my husband is.
Seriously, I used to tell my girlfriends what a great guy he was, even while some were trying to clue me into the rumors of his affair.
So I think when we think of things like that even if there was no external trigger, it makes us feel sad.
I think what makes me saddest is that his sleazy affair will always, now, be part of our marital history.
This women he had an affair with will now always be a part of our marital history, like a troublesome relative who keeps showing up uninvited at family functions.
Every holiday reminds me that he was spending time with and buying gifts for the OW on that holiday, during the affair, while neglecting me and our children.
I can't say for sure, in your case, but perhaps that's what causes the bouts of sadness for you, too.
[This message edited by seethelight at 3:15 PM, July 17th (Thursday)]