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Newest Member: Giupeppe (46032)

User Topic: We are all so Specific on our d-day dates.
lostcovenants
♀ 40637
Member # 40637
Frustrated  Posted: 8:23 PM, July 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Notice how most of us can list the exact date of our D-day? I guess we can add this to the list of dates/places that are forever burned into our memories ... Kennedy's assignation, Armstrong's first step on the moon, the attack on the World Trade Center/pentagon/ and wherever those poor brave souls on the Pennsylvania flight were headed..... And God help us all - our D-day(s). I can't remember my zip code half the time - but July 8th 2013 will forever be burned into my brain.


Haha! The jokes on me, another DDay November 20, 2014! A date that will live in infamy, along with July 8,2013, oh yea and 36.5 years ago right after we got married. Hat trick!! WH is tremblingaspen. Life sucks.

Posts: 198 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: USA
hopeful325
♀ 43521
Member # 43521
Default  Posted: 8:31 PM, July 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Mine was my best friends birthday, I hate that her special day will always be tarnished in my mind :(

Posts: 31 | Registered: May 2014
mhca
♂ 41920
Member # 41920
Default  Posted: 9:05 PM, July 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

D-day #1 Christmas Eve
D-day #2: DS birthday

Won't ever forget.


Me: BH 47 STBXWW 47 (Lklb5)
M 19 years, DS 15, DS 11
DD#1: 12/24/2013
TT/Broke NC/False R
DD#2: 4/15/2014
TT 4/23, 4/24, 5/31, 7/19
Divorcing

Sample recovery plan, feedback welcome: http://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=539961


Posts: 902 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: California
Gemini71
♀ 40115
Member # 40115
Default  Posted: 9:08 PM, July 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You never forget the days that the world as you knew it ended.


Edited to correct stupid typos.

Double Betrayal D-Day 7/26/2013
Divorced 11/18/2014

Two steps forward and one step backwards, is still progress.


Posts: 2090 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Illinois, USA
OakStreet
♀ 41193
Member # 41193
Default  Posted: 9:11 PM, July 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have so many antiversary dates coming up:

When they first connected.
when I first suspected.
My actual anniversary (which I won't be celebrating this year).
And then Dday.

Yippee!


Me: 58
Him: 65
Married: 21 years (well, we'll say 19 now!).
One son: 19, 2 adult stepdaughters
DDay: Oct. 14, 2013
18 month EA/PA with COW
Dday #2: 4/16/14 - took it underground for 5 months.
Haven't decided on outcome.

Posts: 554 | Registered: Nov 2013
PurpleRose
♀ 33129
Member # 33129
Default  Posted: 9:16 PM, July 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

True... But the farther out I have gotten, the less this date means to me anymore. Of course, I divorced the Doosh so I am sure that has something to do with my feelings.

My divorce date is a date of celebration for me now. It's 2 days before my dday (on the calendar) so it took the sting out of dday for me.


divorced the Dooosh
*****************************
even if you find your voice,
sometimes it does not matter anymore,
when you speak to a man who is deaf by choice.
~dodinsky

Posts: 3631 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: Happyville
simplydevastated
♀ 25001
Member # 25001
Default  Posted: 9:23 PM, July 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

June 12th, 2008. The day my world crashed and burned.


Me - BS, 39 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS10, DD7
Married, for now... (4+ D-Day - listed in profile.)

Posts: 5854 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: In the darkest depths of hell!
norabird
♀ 42092
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 9:32 PM, July 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Like PurpleRose, I hope and think these become less burned into our brains with time. It is amazing how the dates stick with everyone. But I firmly believe the impact fades!


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4235 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
Uhtred
♂ 40392
Member # 40392
Default  Posted: 11:37 PM, July 17th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't remember much but my god I remember that day like the back of my hand. I've never felt worse even after having several close people die. A death is something that is natural I guess and easier to deal with.


Me: BH 32years old DDay 4-29-13
Her: WW 33 years old
“Yet each man kills the thing he loves
By each let this be heard
Some do it with a bitter look
Some with a flattering word
The coward does it with a kiss
The brave man with a sword”

Posts: 633 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Houston, Texas
Bobbi_sue
♀ 10347
Member # 10347
Default  Posted: 1:03 AM, July 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Actually, I don't remember any of the exact dates of D-days in my first M (there were 4 of them). It is my opinion, that at least for me, the main reason I remember the two D-days from my current M is because of this forum, realizing we have a term called "D-day" and there is the word antiversary, to commemorate the date in future years.

In the first M, the first D-day was about three years into the M, when our D was about one. I can't pin point it any further than that. I don't even know if it was summer or winter. The second D-day was in November of 1988. I only remember it was slightly before Thanksgiving and I was 7 months preg. with our 3rd child. I remember crying on Thanksgiving, and being thankful for nothing...

The 3rd D-day can be narrowed down to either right before the new year of 1989 began (that same OW from a couple of months earlier). If I wanted to do a little homework I could definitely figure out the exact date of the fourth D-day as I do remember that it was on a Sunday, Father's Day, 1992. I remember trying to make the day normal for the kids. We went to McDonalds with him to "celebrate" Father's day. I didn't confront him until after they went to bed that night. I filed for a D two days later.


Posts: 5791 | Registered: Apr 2006
Lark
♀ 43773
Member # 43773
Default  Posted: 1:41 AM, July 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

June 6, 2014, 12:30ish a.m. is when I opened the phone log. 2:17 a.m. is when I called and told him to come home. 4ish a.m. is when I found out it had been sexual and not just sexting. 11:30ish a.m. is when I found out about OW1 and that it went back a year.


“It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” - Dumbledore

Posts: 1062 | Registered: Jun 2014 | From: California
determinata
42124
Member # 42124
Default  Posted: 2:19 AM, July 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It's been 7 years and the exact dates have faded for me. There's so much other b.s. to remember and be traumatized by.


M 2007. DDay 2008
~10+ CL Prostitutes in 8 months
Divorcing SAWH "ActionsOverWords"
Me: Early 30s BW (also an adult OC) w Baby DS

6 years of TT, hidden STD & false R
Separated 5 mos+; he will not commit
Someday I will be okay


Posts: 288 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York City
BrokenButTrying
♀ 42111
Member # 42111
Default  Posted: 3:25 AM, July 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't remember my first Dday. Like Bobbi_Sue said, I didn't have SI, I didn't discuss it with anyone, I didn't have it written down, least of all in a signature on a forum I read everyday.
I remember the day, I remember what happened but not the date.

I know it was either some time in late 2009 or early 2010 but beyond that, I honestly couldn't tell you. I have 01/10 because it was around that time, January 2010, but I didn't want to run out of characters in my sig!

My 2nd Dday, I remember because it happened after I found SI and I put in my signature so I see it every day.

[This message edited by BrokenButTrying at 3:27 AM, July 18th (Friday)]


Me - 27
Him - 27
Madhatters

My Ddays - Jan 2010 & 12/04/14
His Dday - 23/12/13

Chin up. Unwavering. Fight. I can do this.


Posts: 1270 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: UK
stunnedmullet
♀ 42975
Member # 42975
Default  Posted: 3:43 AM, July 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I will never forget the day that my world as I knew it crumbled and my heart broke into a million pieces


DD April Fools Day 2014 (unfortunately no joke)

BS (me) 40
WH 38
OW - a friend of WH for 5 years

4 month EA which turned into a 5 month PA

Us together 20 years, married 17 and 6 kids

I always thought I was enough but obviously not!


Posts: 232 | Registered: Apr 2014 | From: Australia
Flatlined123
♀ 35862
Member # 35862
Default  Posted: 4:20 AM, July 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

July 11, 2008 at 1:29 pm

A date that will be forever burned in my brain. The day my life as I knew it fell apart.

It just passed and didn't crush me, but I'll never forget that day.


Me: BS 43
H : WS 46
DD #1 7-11-08
DD#2 8-21-09 same OW, A never ended.
Started R in 12-09
"If what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, I should be able to bench press a Buick."

Posts: 698 | Registered: Jun 2012
Ailanthus
♀ 42911
Member # 42911
Default  Posted: 5:06 AM, July 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

October 21, 2012.
You know, on the one year anniversary, I was prepared to feel devastated all over again. And I wasn't. Our divorce had been finalized the previous month, it was a beautiful day, I wore a pretty dress to work…it didn't destroy me again. Still, I doubt I will ever forget the date.

Posts: 31 | Registered: Mar 2014 | From: Appalachia
confused615
♀ 30826
Member # 30826
Default  Posted: 5:23 AM, July 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

August 10, 2010...11:54am.

I had just glanced at the clock as I sat down at the computer..and found his secret email account logged in.


BS(me)42
FWH 45
4 kids
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10
Status: Reconciled.

..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.


Posts: 8084 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: Indiana
TheBestMe
♀ 39476
Member # 39476
Default  Posted: 5:37 AM, July 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I do not remember when my gut told me that my H was having an A. During the LTA each day of the A was a continuing D-day.

Oh, but the day the shit hit the fan! I remember every single detail. My therapist said that contact from it made the A real.

Coincidently, it was the same day that my H and I began his cancer journey. This day, was the day that I had to face the fact that my life as I had hoped, was no more.

Damn....


ME Doing Better
WH Trying As Best He Can
Married 23 years
Status: Working towards friendship
D Day #1 - 2007 My gut told me
D Day #2 - 2010 His D told me
D Day #3 - 1/11/2013 OW Confirmed
LTA 7 years

Both feet pointed forward; positive


Posts: 508 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Inner Peace
kernel
♀ 27035
Member # 27035
Default  Posted: 5:42 AM, July 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

For me it was New Year's Eve, so kind of hard to forget. It isn't a trigger or anything, not anymore. I do sometimes measure time in how long since the divorce, or how long before D-day, i.e. moved to XXX 3 years before D-day, crap like that. I need to stop that.


"On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good."

Posts: 5337 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Midwest
TheIrishGirl
♀ 43496
Member # 43496
Default  Posted: 5:55 AM, July 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yup. My world has crashed twice in the same week- four years apart. 4.16.10 I lost my first pregnancy. 4.18.14 I lost my husband... Well, found out I'd lost him, he's been gone a while.


Me: 31, BW Him: 38, WH
2 children (ours) 7/11 & 3/14
D-day 4/18/14 I saw his 'other' email

Posts: 808 | Registered: May 2014
Topic Posts: 49
Pages: 1 · 2 · 3

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