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Newest Member: FaithGrace

New Beginnings :
My new beginning - well, it began

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 sodamnlost (original poster member #37190) posted at 7:26 AM on Tuesday, July 22nd, 2014

I didn't so much see this one coming, at least not yet. I filed for divorce a week and a half ago, should have a LONG time ago. I wasn't expecting things to feel like this. I am literally being awaken from a horrible dream and running full force into a new life.

A life where I can laugh, a life where I have fun, a life where I have friends, a life where I am *ME* again. That life has finally started, despite SAWH still living on my couch for now. I am moving on and not in an icky way, in a healthy way. Clearly I am not used to healthy and I must say it feels awesome!

I hurt like hell still when I stop long enough to feel it. That's OK though. Part of being me is having big intense feelings. But gosh darn it - somehow I finally realized I am worth more and am on a mission to give myself what he couldn't give to me.

It's about time!

Me - BS original Dday 10-2012, separated June 2014, divorce Fall 2016


Grief, loss and pain taunt her - "you will never be the same." Like a Phoenix rising from the ashes, she rises and spreads her new wings as she brushes off the ashes an

posts: 772   ·   registered: Oct. 19th, 2012   ·   location: Out of the ashes
id 6880817
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bigskyblues ( member #36759) posted at 10:46 AM on Tuesday, July 22nd, 2014

sodamlost, congratulations! Moving on does have it's own pain associated with it, but it is also the point where the real healing begins!

I am very happy for you, enjoy the adventure of finding the "real" you again

BSB

BH 50s
xWW 50s

Dday1 7-2012
Dday2 8-2012
Divorce 9-2012

4 kids all adults.

Married 22+ years.

I have moved on and life is good!

posts: 277   ·   registered: Sep. 8th, 2012
id 6880878
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WeepingBuddhist ( member #39139) posted at 1:29 PM on Tuesday, July 22nd, 2014

Some days are going to suck the marrow from your bones but I wouldn't trade my worst day divorced for my best day married to a cheating bastard.

Me: BS 46
Him: unimportant
D Day:4-27-13
DIVORCED!!! 2-20-14

posts: 978   ·   registered: Apr. 30th, 2013   ·   location: BFE
id 6880958
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norabird ( member #42092) posted at 2:14 PM on Tuesday, July 22nd, 2014

Sodamnlost, this is wonderful. It will keep hurting but it's the pain of rebirth--it means you're moving on. You're going to get an amazing life for yourself and you're right, you DO deserve it! Congratulations.

Sit. Feast on your life.

posts: 4324   ·   registered: Jan. 16th, 2014   ·   location: NYC
id 6881019
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better4me ( member #30341) posted at 2:17 PM on Tuesday, July 22nd, 2014

I remember that feeling. It felt like "anything" could happen. It was both scary and invigorating. You can hurt like hell and at the very same time be excited about what is to come, don't try to block any of your feelings.

Welcome to your New BEGINNING!

DDay 11/17/2010 BW:58
Happily remarried!

posts: 4246   ·   registered: Dec. 9th, 2010   ·   location: Missouri
id 6881022
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