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BrokenDaisy (original poster member #37063) posted at 12:14 AM on Wednesday, July 23rd, 2014
Next week will mark the day when last year I finally escaped in-house separation hell and moved over 900miles away with my son to start our New Beginning. I wrote the following as if I could post a public announcement somewhere.
It was so cathartic to write it (I wrote it for the day next week when it will be a year) I didn't care how it may come across or how some may interpret it different to what my meaning is. It was for me and the best I can express my feelings. I wanted to share it, if not publicly, at least here. I feel every word I wrote. I can finally start to see the healing and change in me. It's slow going but it's happening! I blamed myself for so long, tore myself to pieces to try and fix things. Never giving myself slack or a break. I am notoriously hard on myself. So the focus on me in this piece is new and good for me. I want to be kind to myself for a change and acknowledge my successes and struggles.
Sorry this is so long. 
ETA to remove post. Sorry about that but I'm sure those that we're going to read through this would've by now. Thank you for everyone that did and took the time to respond! Much appreciated! I decided to share it IRL and so don't want someone to do a google search and find my username on here. Even though I don't post much on here, most of the times I have were during very vulnerable times or when I was super scared or panicked. I don't want that to be used against me. I don't want my safe venting space intruded.
[This message edited by BrokenDaisy at 4:49 PM, July 27th (Sunday)]
Me xBW, him SA NPD WxH
1 son: sole legal custody to me and supervised visitation to xwh.
No longer broken
DDay 01/2012
10/2013 Finally Divorced!!
norabird ( member #42092) posted at 2:34 PM on Wednesday, July 23rd, 2014
This made me cry. Striving mightily to create good out of darkness is a wonderful thing, and you are doing amazingly well. Thank you for sharing.
(((BrokenDaisy))))
BrokenDaisy (original poster member #37063) posted at 7:07 PM on Wednesday, July 23rd, 2014
Thank you for reading norabird and the kind words! 
Me xBW, him SA NPD WxH
1 son: sole legal custody to me and supervised visitation to xwh.
No longer broken
DDay 01/2012
10/2013 Finally Divorced!!
WeepingBuddhist ( member #39139) posted at 8:37 PM on Wednesday, July 23rd, 2014
Thank you for sharing this.
Me: BS 46
Him: unimportant
D Day:4-27-13
DIVORCED!!! 2-20-14
Riskybusiness ( member #43475) posted at 9:42 PM on Wednesday, July 23rd, 2014
"Years I gave my all until I realized it would never be enough. Not because I wasn't enough but because it wasn't my void, my problems or my actions causing the endless damage. I could not stop it no matter how much I wanted to."
This.
Thank you for posting and much luck for continued success in your new beginning!
Me-42
Engaged 5/2017
Him-no longer matters
Married 22 years
Two DD-adults. DS-18, DD-14
DIVORCED
Rejoice in hope, persevere in tribulation, be devoted to prayer. Romans 12:12
BaseballMom31 ( member #43637) posted at 5:50 PM on Thursday, July 24th, 2014
This was a very encouraging and inspiring post! Thank you!
The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are stronger at the broken places. -Ernest Hemingway
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