Has anyone else felt this way? Any suggestions?
ME: WH HER: BS (holesinmybucket)
I do not PM with Women
I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling that way. I've had a rough day too, and am also feeling really anxious and unfocused. Do you have something in the back of your mind that you need to talk about? If so, talk about it on SI or to someone in person. Another option, besides antidepressants or supplements, is to practice some serious self-care. If you are able to, go run or do jumping jacks or stretches. Listen to some relaxing/positive music. Cook a healthy meal. Watch a cute or funny video on youtube. One small task at a time, and before you know it, you will start to feel incrementally better. If none of this helps, keep asking yourself why.
One thing that gave me a sense of accomplishment today was finishing, sharing, then editing 2 letters of apology. Talk about emotionally draining!
Here is one of my "why?" exercises. Someone else posted about this earlier, so I tried it. (thanks, whoever that was!!) It gave me that feeling of "Okay, that's a pretty good approximation of why, I can move on to a new topic in my head".
-Why do I have an unhealthy relationship with work?
o Because I donít value the work I am doing.
- Why donít I value the work I am doing?
o I have developed a negative mindset toward work. It doesnít matter how many deadlines I give myself, and how bad I try to feel about NOT doing the work. If I donít value it, it wonít get done.
- Why have I developed a negative mindset toward the work I am doing?
o Because I worked in an environment where people were not respectable, and I associate the work with the people, the place, and my past.
and so on...until you feel done.
Keep posting, and I hope the rest of your day is much better! =^..^=
[This message edited by TheWorstCase at 1:45 PM, July 24th (Thursday)]
theworstcase - quite familiar with the why exercises. I use them regularly.
It is exhausting just going to work. my director has 70% of my NPD mothers attributes. And I still work with an AP. I have had several job interviews since dday came in 2nd on one but still here. I have yet another 2nd interview coming up next week. And my 14 year anniversary. I am feeling spent.
We go in cycles. I am at my job here for 14 years, they put me down to 20 hours. You know the scam... we have financial problems... yada yada yada...
never mind that the guys who own the place one is in Chili with his family for vacation and the other is on the Jersey Shore in a large rental...
I don't work with my AP, but my boss is a manipulative little man who is a micro manager.
I have been looking too. Finally started looking at possibly becoming a recruiter. Who knows.. .
Take it easy.
You have helped me on several occasions, I hope my words can bring you some assistance...
You are on the right path, and help others that are on their way. No wonder why you are exhaused - work, BS, everyone you help here - you need to take a break. Relax. Realize you are doing what you can to heal, you are on the right path, you are improving yourself. You are not a bad person, you did a bad thing, and now you are on a path that makes you a better person. Take a deep breath and then take another.
You are a good person. You are doing the right thing. You are not defined by what you have done, just what you are doing NOW.
You have helped many people here, and they all appreciate it. I know I do.
Thanks for your help. I hope these words help you find peace within yourself.
Currently living apart, unsure of reconciliation. In IC.
in my why exercises that night I came to a new realization.
I had thought that I was no longer accepting external validation, but I have really still been getting validated by my BS. So I am on to a new journey and my BS and I are working through trying to figure out how to validate myself.
I spen years trying to gain the worlds approval now I am trying to do less of that.
The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Edmund J. Bourne http://www.amazon.com/dp/1572248912/ref=cm_sw_r_udp_awd_q9K0tb0KGDW2N
One of the things I am getting better with is perspective. If I am angry, it doesn't mean everything is falling apart. If BW goes a day without saying something to me, it just might be because we are both busy, and not that she hates me. Just be honest and mindful of your feelings.
"If you were happy every day of your life you wouldn't be a human being. You'd be a game-show host." Veronica Sawyer: