Well it has been a loooooong time since I posted. I thought I might update and start participating again. Especially since I'm coming up on my one year anniversary of DDay.
A lot has happened in my life since I last posted. Things got crazy. My oldest munchkin was diagnosed with Autism and was having a difficult time in school. I think we have some things figured out there but it is a process. My middle munchkin had 4 hospital stays in about 5 months time. She was really in poor health all winter into spring and I had to pull her out of school. She steadily getting stronger but we have another hospital stay coming up in August with another round of testing. My little one has a speech delay and is in therapy. Add to that a dysfunctional set of parents and you have enough stress to gain15 Pds.
I went to an intensive therapy weekend back in March that I thought was very helpful. I was told that I have complex PTSD. It helped to see that I was not crazy and also it helped me to understand myself better. I have been working hard on addressing my emotional challenges and healing. Therapy, journaling, meds, working out, etc.
My hubby did therapy and has worked hard. He has worked on expressing his emotion, talking with me, and addressing my concerns or triggers when they arise. We went to a marriage conference which further helped us to heal and build on things. We have come a long way in the last year. We still have further to go.
There have been some things that have made it hard. So if you may recall, OW is our neighbor. Her husband deployed in February. After he left I swear she went off the deep end. CPS was called several times for a variety of reasons. This lead to her husband contacting my husband and I. He wanted to know what was going on. Through a series of conversations there was concern for the kids safety, concern she was leaving, on and on it went. It turns out she has a boyfriend she moved in while hubby was gone. It's been crazy. Just when I thought I was done hearing from him or her I would get a random text. They are now both blocked from FB and my phone. He has been in contact with my hubby who feels obligated to be helpful. ( there is so much more but it would take forever to write out). Needless to say, with her being next door it has been stressful. It would seem however, that she will be leaving soon.
I am still struggling with anxiety attacks, stress, and feeling like my brain is Swiss cheese. I had to step back from here for a while because I was maxed as far as stress was concerned. But as my DDay anniversary approaches I feel increasingly anxious. I need the support. Not to mention a place to vent. Some of the support I had for a while is no longer there.
Oh and to add icing to the cake, I got mono from my kid a few months ago. I was doing well until I relapsed last week. Yeah it's a wonder I can even function at all. Anyways I'm back and ready to learn some more and keep walking this journey.
