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Newest Member: lostsoul8008 (61557)

User Topic: How to manage these feelings
♀ 43702
Member # 43702
Default  Posted: 2:46 PM, July 29th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Earlier this week I found out that WH had edited details about his A "to make it less hurtful" during his confession. R had been mostly going well, and the whole thing made me crazy realizing he had lied AGAIN! I basically reset to the same feelings I had after dday. Then yesterday his car was hit on the expressway by a semi and neither of us can figure out how he escaped it alive. This experience of nearly losing him shocked both of us so badly. I'm having trouble trying to figure out where to go from here. The hurt of earlier in the week pales in comparison to the fact that I could have lost him. And that we were not on good terms when it happened. I know if anything had happened I would have regretted some of the things I said. I don't want to let him off the hook and be a fool, but I am still really freaked out by my near loss. The great and sudden shift in emotions has left my head reeling and not sure what to do now. Any advice appreciated.

BW- 39
WH- 38
Married 2009, together since 2003
DD 2
Dday 6/10/14 multiple EA's spanning our entire relationship, 1 PA with a 24 yo.

Posts: 48 | Registered: Jun 2014
♂ 44263
Member # 44263
Default  Posted: 3:38 PM, July 29th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My wife set me back the same way several times. It felt like she was slowly crushing my spirit. I was walking on eggshells waiting for her to drop more bombs for months after DD.The close call things I'm sure has to do with unresolved issues and the potential of not gaining closer. My wife who was the WS brought up her fear of something bad happening to one of us a lot after dd while we were starting to work on recovery. I think it had to do with her losing the opportunity to make things right. So what your going through is not isolated. The main thing is he is ok and you are free to resume working on your issues.I would also say don't let him use this as an excuse to act like everything is normal...

Me 47
WW 40
D-day Jan 2014 2month EA 2011 TT D-day #2 Feb 2014 2 brief PA 2010-2011
D 12 S 9
Working on recovery

Posts: 474 | Registered: Jul 2014 | From: mn
Topic Posts: 2

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