I just have this fear that he is going to find someone else and realize that what he had before really was not all that great.
^^^^ Lies from the pit of Hell ^^^^^^^^^^^^
Don't believe it, say with me, "get behind me Satan".
You are scared, as is many of us about making big changes when we are emotional, but would it really have made any difference if the OW was completely unattractive? I don't think so. My WWs APs were all very unattractive IMHO, but that never mattered at all to me.
YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL, and as cliche as it is, the real beauty honest men go for is the beauty of the heart, how a woman treats a man. I would never want to marry a Playboy model or anything close to it, only NPDs go for that stuff and all the realtionships are shortlived. Just look on TV, worthless relationships abounding...
YOU are BEAUTIFUL, YOU will find a new path that leads to lasting and worthy love, this is your future mediate on this daily and it will happen in time. Be patient my dear.
An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones (Proverbs 12:4)
R can't be predicated on a fear that he is able to go out there and get laid whenever he wants while you are left to a lonely spinsterhood, or a fear that he might find someone 'better' while you deliberate and take your time over a majorly hard decision.
If he is really waiting for you, than he should not be with anyone else. And if he is with someone else, it's due to brokenness. While you may not be attracting male attention because you aren't in a place to be healthy and available; in other words, you are (quite appropriately!) broadcasting signals that say 'taken' and 'not ready'. Understandably, your energies are directed somewhere other than looking for the cheap ego boost of flirting and being hit on.
Don't let the attention of others artificially inflate or deflate your knowledge of your true worth, which is independent of those two things.
OW - multiple, just found out about ALL of them, Husband coming out of years of fog due to multiple childhood and military events.
Hopeful but cautious