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Ok,enough now, I'm losing beauty sleep and I can't afford it

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AmSoDone posted 8/2/2014 23:19 PM

I can't sleep and have been having a big old pity party all by myself.

Nothing triggered this specifically today but it's been coming for a while. I looked back over my posts and I started with a panic attack about a month ago and I've been hold on by a thread ever since. All the contact, NC, DD issues, THAT text message etc. have taken their toll and I'm a blubbering mess.

So much for my vow never to shed another tear over this man. (He promised he would never make me cry again )

I know I can't change anything. I told my DD that it would take a MAJOR event, i.e. him saying that he was going to a monastery in Tibet to find himself before I would even entertain the thought of 'us' again. So what is my problem?

Help me here, what should I be doing to get past this?

norabird posted 8/2/2014 23:23 PM


We can't get past it just because we want to, unfortunately. Meditation, exercise, relying on bonds with friends and family, time, investing in our own interest and future, IC, reading books on healing all help; but crying the tears helps too, even when we don't want to honor them with anymore of our emotional energy. Think of the tears as being not because of him but for your own benefit--a way of cleansing yourself. The cure for the pain, is the pain.

nekorb posted 8/2/2014 23:36 PM

You're just working your way THROUGH. It's the only way to go.

It sucks.

You'll be better for it on the other side.


AmSoDone posted 8/2/2014 23:58 PM

Yes, you are both right. I think I fooled myself into thinking that I could deal with our break-up. Maybe I thought there might be some chance of R somewhere along the way, IDK. I was waiting for him to come to me at some point.

Then came the OW revelation and it has blown all my thinking out of the water. That has changed everything.

hopefulfourus posted 8/3/2014 09:07 AM


I too, am having problems sleeping. Too much is swirling around in your head right now. In a way I can't wait to go back to work in the fall as I think my mind will be preoccupied and kept busy with other things. Unfortunately, right now, I have a lot of free time. Don't get me wrong, there are a lot of things that I could be doing to stay busy, but I feel frozen to even move off the couch to go do them.

You and I seem to be around the same point in time. Try to get some rest, even if it's during odd times during the day.

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