After fWS let me down yet again last night I wrote this
"Well I can't believe it's been 4 years since I was last on here, doesn't time fly when you're having fun! NOT. I've been on one hell of a roller coaster in that time, denial, anger, reconciliation and now realisation that I think I need to leave. Problem is I don't actually want to :-( Reasons to stay - I love fws, my kids are very attached to ws and it would crucify them if we D, I can't bear the thought of WS being with someone else, I gave up work to be a ft mum and haven't got a penny to my name. We're in the middle of moving house to be in catchment area for our kids school. Reasons to leave - I'm totally miserable, fws makes NO EFFORT or contribution to our marriage, I feel that if I was financially independent then I'd leave.
I'm so tired of being in Limbo, but feel emotionally and financially trapped. I don't know what to do :-("
And then this morning I woke up and heard fWS downstairs and my heart leapt and I felt really happy he was still home (he was supposed to be at work). WTFik is going on??? My head is a total mush, I feel so drained and confused, I just don't know what to do anymore.