I look forward to the time coming nearer and nearer with each passing day when I no longer have to look at the face of the betrayal and feel that knife in my back, that swirling pit in my stomach, that tightness in my chest. I welcome the coming solitude and freedom from her drama and selfish bullshit.
I look forward to the days spent with my kids not spent walking on eggshells, waiting for the drama hammer to drop on our heads. The anxiety felt by all in her presence. I look forward to the freedom to breathe again and relax in my home, free from her nastiness, clutter, and hoarding.
I look forward to spending time with ME. I have not had any me time in 9 years, as it always comes down to her selfish needs and desires. SHE has always felt smothered by our marriage and our children and raising a family, and has sought escape after escape after escape, while I was left holding the bag and sweeping up the shit and destruction left in her wake.
I look forward to peace, and being afforded the opportunity for the first time in 9 years to place my needs on my list of things to take care of. My kids will always be number one, but I can finally place myself up there with them.
I look forward to the solitude in between weeks with the kids, as an opportunity to relax and de-stress. I have zero plans on becoming involved ever again, as I do not feel the capacity to trust any longer nor have the tolerance for anymore bullshit.
Her bullshit and dysfunction will be gone from my life and poisoning another mans existence. May God have mercy on his soul...on second thought, he knew the score when they met and saw the ring. Fuck'em both.
[This message edited by HurtingandLost at 7:35 PM, August 8th (Friday)]
Sons 17 and 9 Daughters 12, 8, 6.
Ex#1 and Ex#2 both cheated
Rediscovering Life. It may not be a bed of roses but at least I don't smell like dog$h!t