The more I think about this, the more this thought is recurring in my mind. And yes I realize this is a stereotype and not all relationships and people fall along these gender lines. But in general betrayed females seem to be more upset about the emotional connection in the A. He expressed affection to the AP, and was able to express his feelings for the OP often in ways he wasn't able to do for his spouse.
On the other hand, betrayed males are often more upset about the sexual aspect. She did this, she did that with the AP. She did sexual acts with the AP that we were only supposed to do together, etc.
Not to say that the male BS is not upset about the emotional connection and that the female BS is not upset about the physical aspect. But for R, you need NC and remorse and some basic things. And I believe both connections needs to be restored for a healthy relationship. Yet it seems to me from following posts on SI that many of the betrayed female spouse are struggling with restoring an emotional connection, to feel loved and appreciated by their WH. At the same time, many of the betrayed male spouses are struggling to restore their sexual intimacy and feel wanted and desired by their WW.
Am I being sexist, or just trying to justify my need to reconnect physically with my WW? Not sure R is possible without this connection. Appreciate your thoughts.