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Not.the.Big.Easy (original poster member #2569) posted at 11:45 PM on Sunday, August 10th, 2014
There are times while I wait for my wife to return from her parents that my anxiety grows. I realize that the anxiety is not just related to my current situation, but triggers from the mindfuck from 14 years ago. My XWGF utilized my absence from New Orleans to conduct a portion of her affair.
I just hope I have the strength to make it through the next few days.
Me: BH (44)
Her: WW (37)(EAish)
Dday 7/23/14
Dday #2 9/9/14
TT #1 10/4/14
TT #2 10/14/14
Doubt I have the whole truth
D final 4/7/16
Not.the.Big.Easy (original poster member #2569) posted at 2:12 AM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
OK, my wife called. I feel better now. Better than what I'm not saying, but I feel better.
Me: BH (44)
Her: WW (37)(EAish)
Dday 7/23/14
Dday #2 9/9/14
TT #1 10/4/14
TT #2 10/14/14
Doubt I have the whole truth
D final 4/7/16
WhatsRight ( member #35417) posted at 2:19 AM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
It is this type of anxiety that I call "the infidelity gift that keeps on giving".
It is my verdant hope that one day we can all overcome this type of trigger – and be at peace.
"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt
I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy
WhatsRight ( member #35417) posted at 2:20 AM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
PS. Let me know if you ever do get over this type of anxiety – and be certain to tell me how you did it! 
"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt
I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy
Not.the.Big.Easy (original poster member #2569) posted at 2:57 AM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
My wife and I lived 6 hours apart when we were first dating. A few weekends out of that time when I wasn't visiting her, I would be anxious because I didn't know what she was doing. A couple times she asked if I minded if she went out with some friends to the bar (and she named who they were). At those times I would say I was almost panicked. But she always called me afterward and always told me about it. I always had to remind myself that she wasn't my ex.
This pattern continued which comforted me and led me to feel a trust that I hadn't in a long time. Unfortunately I trusted too much. So with regard to your P.S.; if I ever get over this type of anxiety AGAIN, I will certainly tell you how.
Me: BH (44)
Her: WW (37)(EAish)
Dday 7/23/14
Dday #2 9/9/14
TT #1 10/4/14
TT #2 10/14/14
Doubt I have the whole truth
D final 4/7/16
djla2929 ( new member #44354) posted at 3:23 AM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
I'm close to 4 weeks since finding out of my wife's infidelity. It's a struggle to cope each day. I have constant anxiety of being away from her or feel uncertain when she departs. Part of our MC is to regain trust, but it's hard. It's almost as if I'm dependent on constant communication of what she's doing (a text, or a phone call, etc). She's been pretty accommodating (as I believe she should). I'm getting ready to start back traveling for my job so that'll be a good test for the both of us. I put faith and trust that she wouldn't stray (at least that's what I thought when she did cheat:/ I pray for peace and comfort for everyone that is going through this ugly business of infidelity.
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