SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

Not.the.Big.Easy posted 8/10/2014 17:45 PM

There are times while I wait for my wife to return from her parents that my anxiety grows. I realize that the anxiety is not just related to my current situation, but triggers from the mindfuck from 14 years ago. My XWGF utilized my absence from New Orleans to conduct a portion of her affair.

I just hope I have the strength to make it through the next few days.

Not.the.Big.Easy posted 8/10/2014 20:12 PM

OK, my wife called. I feel better now. Better than what I'm not saying, but I feel better.

WhatsRight posted 8/10/2014 20:19 PM

It is this type of anxiety that I call "the infidelity gift that keeps on giving".

It is my verdant hope that one day we can all overcome this type of trigger – and be at peace.

WhatsRight posted 8/10/2014 20:20 PM

PS. Let me know if you ever do get over this type of anxiety – and be certain to tell me how you did it!

Not.the.Big.Easy posted 8/10/2014 20:57 PM

My wife and I lived 6 hours apart when we were first dating. A few weekends out of that time when I wasn't visiting her, I would be anxious because I didn't know what she was doing. A couple times she asked if I minded if she went out with some friends to the bar (and she named who they were). At those times I would say I was almost panicked. But she always called me afterward and always told me about it. I always had to remind myself that she wasn't my ex.

This pattern continued which comforted me and led me to feel a trust that I hadn't in a long time. Unfortunately I trusted too much. So with regard to your P.S.; if I ever get over this type of anxiety AGAIN, I will certainly tell you how.

djla2929 posted 8/10/2014 21:23 PM

I'm close to 4 weeks since finding out of my wife's infidelity. It's a struggle to cope each day. I have constant anxiety of being away from her or feel uncertain when she departs. Part of our MC is to regain trust, but it's hard. It's almost as if I'm dependent on constant communication of what she's doing (a text, or a phone call, etc). She's been pretty accommodating (as I believe she should). I'm getting ready to start back traveling for my job so that'll be a good test for the both of us. I put faith and trust that she wouldn't stray (at least that's what I thought when she did cheat:/ I pray for peace and comfort for everyone that is going through this ugly business of infidelity.