This Topic is Archived
sodamnlost (original poster member #37190) posted at 3:37 AM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
I feel so needy, all I have is questions ;(
I am struggling with NC. We still share a bank account and need to have some contact. It always seems to end up personal one way or another. I have NO desire to have him back so it's not that kind of contact on my end. It just sends me down roads I don't want to go down. I get so angry that even after losing us he hasn't changed.
I need a 3rd party to be the go between to keep contact to essential stuff only. I know people have done this here. Who did you chose and why? I have no family and my one good friend has no personal boundaries and loves drama so she's not a good choice. I literally have NOBODY to ask ;(
Any suggestions?
Me - BS original Dday 10-2012, separated June 2014, divorce Fall 2016
Grief, loss and pain taunt her - "you will never be the same." Like a Phoenix rising from the ashes, she rises and spreads her new wings as she brushes off the ashes an
Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 3:48 AM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
I'm wondering if you could just change your banking habits. My ex & I still shared a bank account, but that was so he could deposit the monthly family support amount in it, and I would withdraw it & put it in my own bank account. No conversation or interaction necessary, and he didn't get to see what I was spending (although he certainly found out by pumping the kids for info).
Are you certain you absolutely need to share a bank account?
Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU
Bluebird26 ( member #36445) posted at 7:33 AM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
If you are separated and divorcing you don't need to share a bank account imho.
Get your own bank account it will bring peace to you by not having to deal with your ex more then you essentially need too.
Me: BW
Best thing I gained in my divorce - my freedom.
Life's good.
debbysbaby ( member #32962) posted at 2:20 PM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
I agree. My ex transfers the child support directly to my bank account. We don't need a joint account to do that. Get your own account and let him deposit the money. No conversation needed.
-betrayed almost my whole almost 15 yr marriage
-divorced since 2004
HurtingandLost ( member #29322) posted at 3:14 PM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
As others have said, separation / divorce requires SEPARATE bank accounts. There is ZERO need to share an account for support.
When I was divorced from XWW, I asked her for her account info and then set up a direct deposit with my employer to send money straight into her account.
With STBXWW, I expect to do the same. As a side note, due to XWW antics during divorce, STBXWW and I have never shared ANY accounts.
This Topic is Archived
