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Newest Member: brokenmum15 (48480)

User Topic: The difficult "to do" list never seems to end
♀ 38928
Member # 38928
Sad  Posted: 4:08 PM, August 17th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

But I got one more thing completed - the two flag cases. For those that remember, one flag was draped over DS at the funeral and one was draped over him as we brought him off the mountain. The Army provided one flag case and we ordered a second one with the cases matching, including the medals and ribbons. Not only because we have two flags, but I wanted each DD to eventually get one of the cases and, if they match, there would be no squabbling down the road. I have put a small label on the back of each to designate which flag came from where. I am keeping the flag that came from the mountain as I have a real need for that specific one.

Still so much more to do and it is impossible to really start to heal until all the "stuff" is done...

BS - Me
XPOS - too many OW/OCs over 20+yrs
Kids - DDs 23,18 -DS20 Deceased
M Dissolved 2013

This above all: to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man ~ Shakespeare, Hamlet

Posts: 1582 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Rising out of Hell's ashes!
♀ 18449
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 4:18 PM, August 17th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Posts: 11828 | Registered: Mar 2008
♂ 31240
Member # 31240
Default  Posted: 5:03 PM, August 17th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


fBH (me) - 70 (22 in my head), fWW (plainsong) - 70 (22 in my head), Married 45+, together since 1965, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
I'm not an exemplar. I share my own experience because it's all I know.

Posts: 11731 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: Chicago area
♀ 33226
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 5:58 PM, August 17th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


You can call me NIK

“Fear is the cheapest room in the house. I would like to see you living in better conditions.”
― Hafiz

Posts: 30946 | Registered: Aug 2011
♀ 39193
Member # 39193
Default  Posted: 8:40 PM, August 17th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


As always I'm amazed by your strength and ability to think clearly at a time when it must be so hard to function at all. Hugs x 1000

Me: Enjoying life
Him: Someone else's problem

Follow your heart, but take your brain with you. ~ Alfred Adler
Letting go of the outcome is about the most empowering thing you can do for yourself. ~ LosferWords

Posts: 1458 | Registered: May 2013 | From: Oregon
♀ 22722
Member # 22722
Default  Posted: 11:28 PM, August 17th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh Phoenix, you ARE healing you know. Each step you take might hurt a little or a lot, but you are moving through the process and it's clear to me reading your posts that you are making your way forward.

Thank you for sharing your story. My heart goes out to you, with much love and wishes for peace.


BW then 46, STBXWHNPDPAFTG the destroyer of my entire life.
D-Day 1 1999, D-Day 2,3,4,5,6... 2009 thru 2011.

Separated, divorcing, moving on.
I edit because I always make typos.

Posts: 1505 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: California
♀ 36445
Member # 36445
Default  Posted: 5:37 AM, August 18th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Phoenix you are an amazingly strong person. All these things must be so difficult and you are powering on. Please look after yourself too.

Me: BW

Best thing I gained in my divorce - my freedom.

Life's good.

Posts: 1493 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Australia
♀ 42092
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 9:00 AM, August 18th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4313 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
♀ 20849
Member # 20849
Default  Posted: 10:41 AM, August 18th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Original WS D-Day July 10, 2008. Kept lying, he is gone.
New WS (2 EA's, no PA) 12-3-13
If you don't like where you are, then change it. You are not a tree.

Posts: 15988 | Registered: Aug 2008 | From: Ohio
♀ 39439
Member # 39439
Default  Posted: 1:39 PM, August 18th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Phoenix1. heartbroken_kk is right. You are healing. It is happening in small increments, but it is happening. It seems so hard to believe when it hurts so much, doesn't it? You are incredible and an inspiration to us all. Your determination will get you through this and everything else that needs to be done. I think of you often and I know we all really appreciate the updates. Please know that you are in all our hearts.

And remember Murphy is right. Nothing is so bad that it can't get worse!!!

Posts: 1620 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Ontario, Canada
♀ 36134
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 10:14 PM, August 18th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 6347 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
♀ 35810
Member # 35810
Default  Posted: 12:05 AM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I second what gypsy said. Everyone else too, but my first thought was the same as gypsy's - to be so thoughtful about the future, so detailed, it really paints a beautiful image in my mind of you lovingly attending to the flags. You take such good care of memories, it's very warm and kind...seems like a beautiful way to honor DS, DDs and yourself.

Me: Former BW, 28
Divorced 10/11/12
He didn't show up for the D...very fitting, seeing as he didn't show up for the M, either : )
"What did not demolish me simply polished me, now the clearer I can see" - India Arie

Posts: 388 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Back in the Southeast!
Topic Posts: 12

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