Not much discussion. I've talked. He gave me an open door one day with a comment about another situation, and I called him on his crap. Shook him up a bit. Still not much conversation. But there are actions.
Over the weekend I had a small disappointment. He apologized. Genuinely apologized for the sitch. With his hands kneading my shoulders. He didn't shrug and say "bummer. Sorry 'bout that.". His apology language has changed. It feels like he actually cares and doesn't brush it off anymore. Like my hurt/frustration/irritation actually register with him now.
He is still running with me. My allergies are murdering me and it's really a struggle. He works all day, then runs with me. As tired as he is. Pushing and encouraging. Not just on Sunday anymore. But every day I run. He knows what this means for me and is supporting. Even if I fall short of my goal.
One evening after the kids were in bed, he surprised me with something we used to do. It was a moment for just the two of us. It felt peaceful. Happy.
Again, not much talking. But I'm seeing action. Not just with the examples above, but all the way across the board. I'm reading between the lines of his actions to fill in my blanks. I wanna analyze and talk and hash and discuss. He may never do that. So I'm trying to let it go. (No Frozen references please.) I still need talking. But I guess I need to make better decisions on which hills I want to die on. *shrug*
Is this change permanent? Dunno. Hope so. All I can do is roll with it. And be vigilant. And keep working on me.
"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne
As if we are running exact parallels, Crazz accidentally stepped on my foot last night and his face contorted into something that resembled actual sympathy as he apologized. I was taken aback and almost laughed. But then I let him know I appreciated it.
Oy. Small victories?
Small victories?
One day at a time. That's all I know to do.
"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson "She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson
Digging our way through.
“The most difficult times for many of us are the ones we give ourselves.” ― Pema Chödrön
I would suggest you make sure he knows that you like the things he's begun to do, give him positive feedback/reinforcement.
Best wishes going forward!
Absolutely Hobbes. He knows.
ES, I still feel like such a mess. I tease Jrazz about being a Spazz, when in reality, I'm the Spazz. It's so hard finding the right balance with it all.
Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless
We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.
Nothing wrong with a little spazzing here and there.
