The 180 is for a BS who has an unremorseful WS. Since you are trying to R, the 180 isn't needed here.
ETA: Its been 3 weeks since dday. Right now the therapist should be concentrating on getting the two of you through the affair fallout..not the problems in the marriage before dday.
Working on other problems, this soon after dday, is similar to trying to shut the door while your house is on fire. You put the fire out first.
[This message edited by confused615 at 1:59 PM, August 23rd (Saturday)]
M: June 2001
Status: Reconciled. Love my "new" husband!
..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.