Dealing with the police is never any fun. If he was charged with Criminal Domestic Violence, he is in for a world of hurt when it comes to the courts and the fallout that comes with a CDV charge. Contrary to television shows, once an arrest is made, there isn't an option to "press charges." It is in the State's hands at that point if they decide to prosecute, and they will since more than 90% of people take a plea bargain rather than go to trial.
When people are mad and in a rage, they almost never take responsibility for their anger. Something outside themselves "caused" their anger, so you "caused" him to get mad. Then you "caused" the police to show up and now everything is your fault because he can't or won't take responsibility for his anger issues.
This is a shitty situation and I'm sorry you're dealing with it.