We sing public karaoke...lots of memories both good and bad surround karaoke.
One night, the bf of the hostess was wanting me to sing She Wolf. I declined as it tells a very exact story of our last debacle. I didn't think I could get through it and I'd already suffered the extremely public embarrassment of a complete panic attack on stage in front of at least 100 people earlier on during his affair. I was singing a long favorite..If You Could Read My Mind from Gordon Lightfoot, another intensely personal song outlining so much of our life. It took awhile to reclaim that but in my favor, I got back on stage after a massive screaming fit out on the street in the rain. I've never done anything like that before or since.
Anyways, I ramble but back to She Wolf. My H asked me why I wouldn't want to sing that song >.<
I faced that demon though...I did learn to sing it privately and one night, I will sing it publicly because that's how I purge and give a big "fuck you" to the pain surrounding something and the people who caused it. There are few things I can do that with but I take any opportunity I can.
He's always listening to music that involves infidelity etc because so much of current music does and it never registers on him and it never has. This has always bothered me but he simply doesn't make that connection. I'm very symbolic so everything means something. He isn't. Don't know what else to say other than it's baffling. Fyi, he is remorseful and has been pretty perfect about healing things so it's not that he's still wayward, it's just him...he's a music freak and can't make the connection.
In case anyone's interested:
She Wolf
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/davidguetta/shewolffallingtopieces.html
If you could read my mind
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/gordonlightfoot/ifyoucouldreadmymind.html
Me: 44 BS
Him: 40 FWS
Ow: 47 head case, no obs
5 DD's: 23, 20, 19, 17, 12
Last D-day: August 2012 with lots of very blurry lines.