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I am choosing to edit this post b/c a friend of mine found me on SI and now is hurt b/c of some of the things he read on here. I feel violated.

[This message edited by Exit Wounds at 9:10 PM, July 20th (Friday)]

I don't want to offend anybody either, but 5'5" is my personal dealbreaker height. I wouldn't date anybody shorter than that.

If I were a tall woman, though, I don't think I'd have an issue with dating someone a few inches shorter than I was. I don't think I'd be dating a 5'6" guy if I were 6' tall, but I would date a guy who was 5'10".

I am not a tall woman, though, I'm 5'2".

I am 5'8", which is on the tall side. My problem is that I am also a "bigger" woman. My WXH was a petite man.

Being with him made me feel like an enormous cow. So, now I find myself gravitating toward taller and bigger men.

I would like someone to be at least my height, maybe a little taller.

To aid my ability to wear heels and not tower over a gent, I like my guy to be at least 2-3 inches taller than me, so that would put him at 5'7" to 5'8" (on the 'shorter' end for guys, I guess). On the other end of that spectrum, I'm not one to say "he has to be over 6ft tall" since that's probably guaranteed to give me neck problems eventually.

That said, I've dated a couple of guys that were shorter than barefoot me. One was really nice, but we just had no real chemistry. The other guy had a lot of attitude problems including what truly seemed to be a complex about his height.

If a guy is nice, treated me well, etc- that was my top criteria. My minimum height was more of a plus, not a requirement.

My hubby is 5'8". We fit just fine together.

I prefer taller guys also (never been a problem for me at 5'4"!), because I love wearing heels and I don't really like being taller than my guy....just seems a bit strange.

However, if I had a guy that was perfect for me, treated me well, and had a good heart, I would overlook the height thing.

I love, love, love to wear heels. The higher the better. I'm normally in 4-5 inch heels and am 5'4.

I don't have a problem with a guy being shorter than me with my heels on. The only issue I had with a date was him telling me he was considerably taller than I am so I wore some tall heels. However, when he came to pick me up he was no where near what he said so that I was a bit of a turn off. We also didn't have much chemistry so it didn't go past that. If the chemistry is there, I could look past height as long as he was fine with my heel obsession...that is something that I won't be giving up taller or not.

[This message edited by ARae2 at 10:39 AM, July 18th (Wednesday)]

Everybody has their preferences.

Just bear this in mind when you find some guy my height (5'7") who is otherwise perfect for you, but then gets resentful of you passing him by for someone inferior but taller.

Or the next time some tall dude passes you by for someone with bigger breasts. Or smaller; different preferences come in all sizes.

Not a deal breaker for me. I think couples that are both on the short side are super cute. I'm 5'3 as well. My long term relationships have been with guys in the 5'10-6' range. It just happened that way. I went on dates with shorter guys and had no problems with it. Those relationships just didn't form for one reason or another.

I think you should give him a chance. Don't rule him out for something he has no control over!

Everybody has some preferences that really shouldn't matter, or may even be irrational.

For myself, if a woman is shorter, I prefer that she be comfortable wearing stripper heels when shopping. STBX could not, and was forever getting lost among the racks in the clothing store and I spent many hours of my life looking up and down aisles for her.

I tell people I'm 5'10 but I'm actually closer to 5'11, I just round down... so pretty tall. A guy has to be at least as tall as me but preferably a little taller.

When I was online dating I went on a date with a guy that had on his profile that he was 5'10 also. He showed up and was about an inch shorter than me and he was wearing cowboy boots (I'm from the midwest ). Major turn off for me, more so the false info on his profile than his height.

I don't wear heels much because I tower over people already but I like a guy to be a bit taller (at least 2 inches) because it makes them seem a little more masculine/makes me feel safe with them.

I don't see it as being picky to not want to date someone who is the same height as you.

I prefer a man be my height or taller. I'm 5'6.

[This message edited by lieshurt at 7:08 PM, July 20th (Friday)]

I am editing b/c I feel my thoughts are not private anymore.

[This message edited by Exit Wounds at 9:14 PM, July 20th (Friday)]

Yes, I would not date a guy shorter than me, same height or close to.

That might sound superficial, but I don't think it is. We like what we like. Some dudes might think my brown off is an automatic no - that's life.

I guess my biggest issue is he is 5'3 like me! So wearing high heels would make me feel very uncomfortable. 5'7 is OK b/c w/ heels I can be his hight...

Again, I am trying to see if it is something I can get over?

EW - If you want to know whether this is something you can get over, I think you need to look at what it is, specifically, about standing taller than him while wearing heels that is uncomfortable for you.

Not a dealbreaker at all. SO is only a little taller than me (I'm 5'6"). He's not bothered by it when I wear heels. In fact, I think he kinda likes it.

I'm 5'3". The tallest man I dated was 6', but I'm more comfortable with shorter men - current SO is 5'7". I feel disadvantaged when I'm with a really tall person - it makes me feel too vulnerable, plus all that looking up hurts my neck!

NL

I am 5'9". I prefer a man taller than I am.

I've been dating a man who says he is 5'10" but I don't think so. I think I'm about an inch taller than he is. It hasn't bothered me. But, i think it would if he was more than an inch shorter.

It bums me out to have this preference because it limits my potential dating field. I think that if a man was comfortable with being a few inches shorter than I am, I would give it a try and see how it went. So, I'm not opposed to dating a shorter man. I can't, however, see myself dating someone who is 6" shorter than I am. It would feel uncomfortable to me.

I work with a woman who is about 6'6"...no kidding. Her husband can't be more than 5'9". He doesn't even come to her shoulders. It is the oddest thing I've ever seen. But, I have a great deal of respect for them. They are better people than I am.

From a guy's perspective, I am 5'8" or 5'9". My XWW is 5'7" so when she wore heels, she was taller than me. I always thought that it was a little sexy for some weird reason.

I want to add that although I'm only 5'3", I'm not fond of high heels. I like comfortable shoes - no more than 1 1/2 inch heels. If I try anything taller than that, on my budget, I end up teetering around and wincing from the pain.

NL

I don't know for sure ... but I tend to think not.

I think what is more likely to be the dealbreaker is how he feels about his height.

When I was in my 20s and wore heels daily (work outfits and all) I dated a guy who was 5'7" - I am 5'6" so in 3-inch heels I was taller than him. His attitude toward the height thing was such a turn off that in the end his feelings (read insecurity) about his height made it a dealbreaker. I would meet him after work at a club or bar and he would ask me to change into flats or tennis shoes (really with a business suit?). Uh ... no. And when I refused he'd pout like a little girl.

I will say that his attitude did create a bit of a feeling of caution in me and I haven't dated a man who is that close to my height since.

[This message edited by SouthernGal at 5:56 PM, July 18th (Wednesday)]