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I Can Relate Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Dealing With Depression
Wales
♀ Member
Member # 14222
Default  Posted: 2:29 AM, April 16th (Monday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Strike2,

Hang in there. It's tough to wait to get in to see a doc. and wait until you wind up with the right match to help you. If you feel like losing it, come post here and get it out. We're here for you! I'm glad you're looking for a doctor that specializes in this. Too many just don't get it.
(((((Strike2))))))

Pivot,
I'm sorry your Lexapro isn't working so well anymore. Wellbutrin can be increased up to 400 mgs/day in some people. From what I see in this thread, changing AD's, especially SSRIs, in not uncommon. Apparantly their effectiveness can fade. It's tough.

pseudonym,
Thanks. Sure is frustrating, huh? My (former) doc tried to accuse me of "liking to change medications around." What a jerk. No-one likes to go through the unpleasantness of trying and failing ADs until hopefully something starts working again. That's just the reality, especially with SSRIs, as I've learned, even just from reading this thread.

My best to each of you here at this forum.


"Never, never, never quit."
(on yourself)

"When you're going through hell, keep going"
(until you're through it)

Winston Churchill, in quotation marks. Words in brackets added, by Wales.


Posts: 69 | Registered: Apr 2007
Wales
♀ Member
Member # 14222
Default  Posted: 2:33 AM, April 16th (Monday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Question/Poll:

How many of us who've been treated for depression have had to change AD meds at least once since your depression first started? How many have had to switch meds more than once?

Thanks in advance. Much peace to all here.


"Never, never, never quit."
(on yourself)

"When you're going through hell, keep going"
(until you're through it)

Winston Churchill, in quotation marks. Words in brackets added, by Wales.


Posts: 69 | Registered: Apr 2007
KiwiJ
♀ Member
Member # 13131
Default  Posted: 2:49 AM, April 16th (Monday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Depression since childhood. First recollection was at about 11.

First medication was at 16.

Been on and off various medications all my adult life.

Yes, tried all sorts and most have worked very well. Paxil was the worst for the sexual side effects.

My current AD is WONDERFUL. Cipramil. I'm not sure what that is in the USA.


Jen

Posts: 7132 | Registered: Jan 2007 | From: New Zealand
one sad lady
♀ Member
Member # 12891
Default  Posted: 3:24 AM, April 16th (Monday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I've been depressed off and on for the last 15 years. I've been through rounds of prozac, paxil, lexipro. Wellbutrin gave me insomnia. The others gave me really bad stabbing pains in my head and dizziness when I forgot to take them, which was often. And 10 times worse during withdrawal. They all helped me accept my lot in life, which was that I was married to a jerk. I am scared to ever take them again.

I have also taken xanax for general anxiety panic attacks.

I am seriously depressed today for a variety of reasons but since being separated and decision made to divorce, I generally feel quite good. That tells me a lot of the depression and anxiety was associated with trying to live with a controlling selfish, possibly NPD emotional abuser.

What has helped me a lot in recent months is a little yellow book called Feeling Good. I can't recall the author off hand. It is really about how you react/respond to other people's actions and how you can stop. It is really, really helpful and I hope some of you will find it and read it.

I may be back later if this current wave doesn't pass soon. Peace to all.


In the heaviness of night, when all
Creatures seek the ghost of Slumber, I
Sit up, singing at one time and sighing
At another. I am awake always.

~ Khalil Gibran


Posts: 4476 | Registered: Dec 2006
Newlease
♀ Member
Member # 7767
Default  Posted: 1:50 PM, April 16th (Monday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I've had to switch medications more than once. It takes awhile sometimes to find one that works with your chemistry.

NL


Even if you can't control the world around you, you are still the master of your own soul.

Posts: 7557 | Registered: Aug 2005
Newlease
♀ Member
Member # 7767
Default  Posted: 3:04 PM, April 16th (Monday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Anybody else having trouble making a decision or focusing? It's been over 2 years since d-day and subsequent divorce. I REALLY feel like I'm over that trauma and have moved on, but I have this lingering problem of feeling that nothing matters.

I have happy times, but can't focus or care about daily stuff. I'm back in IC and on anti-d. I'm just so sick of feeling this way. I wish I could find something to energize me - I'm just going through the motions.

NL


Even if you can't control the world around you, you are still the master of your own soul.

Posts: 7557 | Registered: Aug 2005
goodboyinDC
♂ Member
Member # 10377
Content  Posted: 6:39 PM, April 18th (Wednesday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

well i have tried prozac for a very small period of time. i had to basically break the capsule open so that i could dissolve the contents of one capsule in 8 oz of water and then i would need to sip like an ounce per day for the week.

i got too tingly of a feeling and hyper.

so we switched to imipramine. i don't know about that one. maybe the therapist i had was much more effective but i don't recall anything particularly great about that drug. i did that for about a year and a half.

then i moved to nyc and lived without ADs.

but when i moved to VA/DC, i was in a big funk - due to a break up and life wasn't turning out as it should have been - so i wanted to live like i was taking exstacy.....and the psychiatrist said then that i would love Effexor!

and i did......

i had orgasmic feelings and euphoria every time i yawned. small yawns, big yawns.....i felt like i creamed my pants without any need to change my underwear. i loved that Effexor.

that lasted about a good six-eight months. then i turned evil and a total bitch. i would bite anyone's head off.....i would be so irritable. i changed. where did my phantom orgasms go????

needless to say, things got complicated and i got off the meds myself and suffered brain and body shocks at random!

finally that went away but after about what seemed like a year.

my second visit with Effexor XR gave me my orgasms back but didn't last as long and i got just as evil again.

so got off.....

and i haven't been on anything since like 2003.

but tomorrow, i am going to join the pill popping club again. this time, after some more careful research, i think Cymbalta will help me or at least i feel comfortable that this would be a good follow up to Effexor.

here's to cymbalta.......i am keeping my fingers crossed for some AD orgasms!!!!


Don't tell God how big your mountains are. Tell the mountains how big God is. Thank you God for everything in my life. I find peace in You.

Posts: 3642 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Washington, DC
goodboyinDC
♂ Member
Member # 10377
Default  Posted: 6:07 AM, April 20th (Friday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

well believe it or not, just one day on cymbalta and i am already feeling something.

yesterday i went into yawn overdrive!!!! some of them had a very light light orgasmic feeling but not fullblown like the effexor.....

hmmmm.....

maybe today on my second dose i will get them more....

****
certainly can feel the 'edge' taken off from my worries and my thoughts are not rushing into my head like they normally do.

and amazingly, i didn't get up to pee or just wake up at 3 am like i have been all week long.......

****
okay here is to day no. 2.......

edited to add day no. 2:

so far so good.....took it at 730 am and i started yawning at around 10ish....getting a nice calm feeling rushing over me throughout the day.

it was like taking valium......kept me from getting too irritated or too reactive to my environment.

but alas, no intense orgasmic feelings like effexor but there is a tiny feeling of something in my upper part of my body.....

i wasn't very hungry today at all even after jogging 5 miles.....which was a bit challenging but i got through it!

i had some good sleep through the night and didn't have to wake up to go to pee.....

woke up on day 3 with very little stiffness if any in my back and neck which is nice.....

[This message edited by goodboyinDC at 6:16 AM, April 21st (Saturday)]


Don't tell God how big your mountains are. Tell the mountains how big God is. Thank you God for everything in my life. I find peace in You.

Posts: 3642 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Washington, DC
Noclue
♂ Member
Member # 10250
Default  Posted: 10:17 AM, April 23rd (Monday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well... seems to me that i'm now part of this forum too.

Got diagnosed last week in IC to be in an adcance state of depression. She immediatley told me to go see my doctor. I'm meeting him wednesday and then ff Igo on either meds or whatever he prescribes. I feel like I could sleep everywhere I go but just can't sleep. I also want to byte everyone's head at work and i'm also just this bouncing dynamite. I just can't sit still. I always have to run and do something and I'm very impulsive.

Those are all great and a good sign of depression but as much as my thoughts of suicide. Been having them more and more lately and this has been since I was 15 or more and I'm 34 right now.

As soon as something as little as a rainy day comes and I feel like ending it all.

Will need help guys. Just registered on deppression.org and will get help from there too.


Do not do what I've done. Let my life be a lesson for you.

Posts: 6562 | Registered: Mar 2006 | From: Ontario
hollie
♀ Member
Member # 9949
Default  Posted: 6:19 PM, April 23rd (Monday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hello, I too suffer from clinical depression. As I read these posts I am sorry to see so many people in such pain on account of their depression, but take some relief in seeing I am not alone. I am very glad for this I Can Relate/Dealing with Depression thread.

In response to Wales' poll I have had to switch meds many times before finding a medication that offered long term positive effects. Aprox 10 years ago was my first treated 'bout' of depression and it took 18 medications before finding the right one for me. Boy, that was a long haul. I began taking high doses of a medication called Manerix and it finally did the trick for me. It is an MAOI (vs many newer medications which are generally SSRIs)
All this to say hang in there if you need to try a few untill you find a good fit for yourself.

I had been med free for 3 years prior to finding out about the affair. This time though I was able to start straight back on Manerix, and it started working right away. I currently also take seroquel (which is actually an antipyschotic) to help lower anxiety levels. These medications give me the health to find stregnth to get up in the morning.

This is becoming a long post but I am just happy to have a spot to say all this
One more thing I would like to say is that clincal depression is an illness that needs to be treated. It is not something you have because you are weak or have been thrown for a loop or are lazy or just can't cope. You wouldn't let your diabetes go untreated, and this is the same.
If you are feeling depressed you really should see your doctor. At the very least you'll have wasted the money on parking but at the most you'll find some support you need.

[This message edited by hollie at 6:20 PM, April 23rd (Monday)]


Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
(Lily Tomlin)

Posts: 162 | Registered: Mar 2006 | From: Canada
DunnoWhatToDo
♀ Member
Member # 13511
Default  Posted: 8:44 AM, April 24th (Tuesday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi all. Glad to see this thread...

My therapist referred me to a psych to talk about going on AD's. And I have to say, after reading all these posts I'm kinda scared to! Some of the side effects have me freaked! I already have major issues with self esteem so weight gain and acne are just about the last thing I need right now!


Me: BS / 37 Him: WH / 38 / SA
Married 8 yrs, together 15
Kids: Twins 4 1/2 yrs old, my angels
DD#1: June '04 Total BS
DD#2: 09/25/06 told him to move out 09/27/06
riding reconciliation rollercoaster

Posts: 120 | Registered: Feb 2007 | From: New York
Digger 4 Truth
♀ Member
Member # 14155
Default  Posted: 9:02 AM, April 24th (Tuesday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I've been holding on to my scrip for weeks now. I need something to help me cope, but I'm scared of side effects and that fact I can't handle this on my own.


Trying to find myself and prepare for the future ... whatever it may hold.

Posts: 67 | Registered: Apr 2007
unsaveable
♀ Member
Member # 12620
Default  Posted: 2:13 PM, April 24th (Tuesday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


I've been on Effexor XR since 2004. Psych diagnosed me then with PTSD and Panic disorder. I also take Lorazepam when needed. I told him a lot of the stuff going on in my marriage back then and he really emphasized the need for me to realize or read about battered women's syndrome.

My anxiety has calmed since STBX left the home.

But now I am into a new realm of freakiness. Just thinking about everything I have to do now/and my situation, I get all of the previous symotoms of anxiety but now, add EXTREME nausea, tingling in my fingers & extremities, feeling like I am going to faint. It is really just becoming toooo much. Last night I had a HUGE panic attack in the car.
Today I am totally nauseas, tingling, and can barely get anything done.

Anybody else giong through something like this?
I don't know if I should go back to the Dr. or what. Please any help or suggestions much appreciated.


Posts: 4391 | Registered: Nov 2006
goodboyinDC
♂ Member
Member # 10377
Default  Posted: 7:12 PM, April 24th (Tuesday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

well i am on day six of cymbalta.

ever since i started, i have not had to get up in the middle of the night to pee! actually in the UK, they use this drug for those who do get up in the middle of the night to pee......

also, my hunger is practically gone. not like i don't get hungry but it's like once a day. and i don't eat as much as i did before.

it's amazing.

although no orgasmic yawning, i think i do prefer this AD over Effexor XR which i was on for a couple of years.

****

i only had one moment of zombiness, which happened yesterday during work between 3-4 pm. work was really boring my ass yesterday.....

other than that, it has been a good week.


Don't tell God how big your mountains are. Tell the mountains how big God is. Thank you God for everything in my life. I find peace in You.

Posts: 3642 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Washington, DC
gluton4punishmnt
♀ Member
Member # 7181
Default  Posted: 12:04 AM, April 26th (Thursday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ive made an appt with my Dr for tom am. I called his office today telling the nurse that I HAD to get back on SOMETHING ASAP! She worked me right in first thing in the am. I cant stnad it anymore. I feel useless, worthless, and basicaly like shit 24/7 and its just getting worse. Being a single mom to three kids is hard enough, add to that the asshole ex that I have to see twice a week every week, a 5.5 yr old with ODD and ADHD who is FAILING kindergarten, work stress, bills and being so overweight that I cant stand the sight of myself anymore and my body aches constantly....im just at the end of my rope. Im about to give up .......



Posts: 3902 | Registered: May 2005 | From: Allergy Hell
KiwiJ
♀ Member
Member # 13131
Default  Posted: 3:13 AM, April 26th (Thursday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

gluton, AD's will help. Believe me they will help.

I ran out of mine a couple of months ago and I waited a week before seeing the doc. By the time I got there they were worried about giving me the full supply in case I overdosed.

The even keel they keep me on is worth it's weight in gold. No side effects, just normality.

I've told someone else here it's like coming into the sunshine after being in the dark.


Jen

Posts: 7132 | Registered: Jan 2007 | From: New Zealand
KiwiJ
♀ Member
Member # 13131
Default  Posted: 3:15 AM, April 26th (Thursday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Don't give up gluton. I've seen your pic. That twinkle in your eye is wonderful. You're full of personality. Don't knock it.


Jen

Posts: 7132 | Registered: Jan 2007 | From: New Zealand
gluton4punishmnt
♀ Member
Member # 7181
Default  Posted: 5:25 PM, April 26th (Thursday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks Kiwi...

went to the Dr and he put me on 10mg daily Lexipro. We'll see how things go.



Posts: 3902 | Registered: May 2005 | From: Allergy Hell
howcouldhe1
♀ Member
Member # 13210
Default  Posted: 3:10 PM, April 27th (Friday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi everyone, i guess I'm joining the club.

I have never suffered from depression, always been an optimist. But since D day, in November, I've been on that roller coaster we all know so well. Despite some set backs, I've usually been able to pull myself back up again, until the last two weeks. Now I seem to be feeling constant despair, at the thought of the rest of my life being filled with such pain. I can't face talking to anyone, can't even look anyone in the eye and feel worthless and useless. Nothing seems worth bothering about, and whilst I wouldn't consider harming myself because of my kids, the thought of going to sleep and not having to wake again to deal with this is appealing.

My doctor diagnosed moderate to severe depression on Monday and today I have had my first appointment with a psychiatrist for evaluation. I go back next week to start therapy. I'm not considering anti Ds at the moment as I'm really scared about side effects, particularly loss of libido as it was the lack of sex in our M that led to the A.

Fingers crossed to us all.


Me BS 54 FWH (BT) 52 M 22 years D Day 4/11/06 Over a year of trickle truths. March 08. D Day 2. Online porn and SA. Just when I thought we'd be ok, July 19 08. BT had accident. Severe brain damage, in persistent vegetative state. I lost him anyway.

Posts: 5488 | Registered: Jan 2007 | From: Kent UK
betinkers
♀ Member
Member # 11386
Default  Posted: 3:50 PM, April 27th (Friday), 2007View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Firmly back in depression.

Went to the doctors today - for some reason I always think they're going to tell me that I'm just imagining it, and there's nothing wrong with me. They never do, they just give me ADs immediatly.

Exeflor this time. Not had this one before.

I'm getting shorter and shorter gaps between periods of medication.


Me: BS 37
Him: WH 37
Reconciled - we even have a new cute little baby girl
D day 06/06/2006

Posts: 1305 | Registered: Jul 2006 | From: uk
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