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I Can Relate     Print Topic    
User Topic: One Night Stand Support Thread
whathappenedtome
♀ Member
Member # 21695
Default  Posted: 10:34 AM, April 1st (Wednesday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

its... hope you are better today!


Posts: 289 | Registered: Nov 2008 | From: Way UpNorth, California
itspjw
♀ Member
Member # 21268
Default  Posted: 10:42 AM, April 1st (Wednesday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

ohpuhlease, it's good to hear from you.

rainbow, don't be too hard on yourself.

db, i know exactly what you mean

wh2m, thanks.

i'm still feeling very down. down like i was a few days out.

((((hugs))))


no, I can't take one more step towards you...cuz all that's waiting is regret...

there's just too much that time cannot erase

dday 9/11/08

And the more I know, the less I understand

Because of you...I am afraid...


Posts: 14786 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: Texas
rainbowlittle
♀ Member
Member # 22334
Default  Posted: 11:45 AM, April 1st (Wednesday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

it was stupid fight...DD was not eating dinner wanted to play with WH...while he wasnt focusing on her (may have been tired right after work), i was getting frustrated trying to get dinner into her and just let it out on WH that he is passive, not focused on family etc. etc. and you all know where this was coming from....and also screamed on DD that your father doesnt want to play NOW!!!
The thing is i feel sorry for sreaming but i realise the truth may be...truly he is not focused, no energy, on to his mobile etc...while talking to DD.....earlier it wasnt an issue ...i would think of course office takes precedence, he is tired after a long day at work, would feel tender towards him...now i just see everything thru the infidelity glasses and feel he is not been remorseful enough to focus on his family or may be now i see the truth...am confused....i feel him so disconnected.....
Its such a hopeless feeling...like notihng will work out ever. because we both are really on different planes...


Bad marriages don't cause infidelity; infidelity causes bad marriages.
-Frank Pittman


Posts: 88 | Registered: Jan 2009
itspjw
♀ Member
Member # 21268
Default  Posted: 1:17 PM, April 1st (Wednesday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((((rainbowlittle)))))


no, I can't take one more step towards you...cuz all that's waiting is regret...

there's just too much that time cannot erase

dday 9/11/08

And the more I know, the less I understand

Because of you...I am afraid...


Posts: 14786 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: Texas
itspjw
♀ Member
Member # 21268
Default  Posted: 4:02 PM, April 1st (Wednesday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

wow. just wow.

i thought i had pretty much the whole truth.

apparently there are some things he "forgot"

trickle trickle.

sucks


no, I can't take one more step towards you...cuz all that's waiting is regret...

there's just too much that time cannot erase

dday 9/11/08

And the more I know, the less I understand

Because of you...I am afraid...


Posts: 14786 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: Texas
whathappenedtome
♀ Member
Member # 21695
Default  Posted: 4:50 PM, April 1st (Wednesday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((rainbowlittle))))

its - what's going on?

your h always seems to be ahead of the pack... what could possibly trickle in?

i hate hate hate this.... we are all good people. why do bad things happen to good people.


Posts: 289 | Registered: Nov 2008 | From: Way UpNorth, California
dbjl
♀ Member
Member # 22878
Default  Posted: 5:12 PM, April 1st (Wednesday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Rainbow)))

Oh,Its! I hate this! At least I know my H hasn't told all! My heart goes out to you!

I've pretty much stayed off today. I took Granddaughter #1 home... 40 mile drive. Most of you know I have this mentor.

The weather in the area is beautiful. My mentor lives about 150 miles away. She sent me a big ehug this morning & said " NO SADNESS TODAY!"

I've done pretty good.

Sending you sunshine & hugs to all of you! WH2M, Its, ohpuhlease,... and Rainbow


Posts: 216 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: The land of pain
dbjl
♀ Member
Member # 22878
Default  Posted: 5:15 PM, April 1st (Wednesday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Rainbow)))

Oh,Its! I hate this! At least I know my H hasn't told all! My heart goes out to you!

I've pretty much stayed OK today. I took Granddaughter #1 home... 40 mile drive. Most of you know I have this mentor.

The weather in the area is beautiful. My mentor lives about 150 miles away. She sent me a big ehug this morning & said " NO SADNESS TODAY! Go out & enjoy the beautiful weather... wishing I was close enough to work in the flowerbed with you & have a margarita"

I've pretty much done what she said... not the flowerbed or margarita... (yet ... that may yet happen!) But, I've kept my thoughts on better things.

Sending you sunshine & hugs to all of you! WH2M, Its, ohpuhlease,... and Rainbow


Posts: 216 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: The land of pain
whathappenedtome
♀ Member
Member # 21695
Default  Posted: 5:34 PM, April 1st (Wednesday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have this friend who I can tell anything to. She is sweet and thoughtful and kind and caring. I can tell her anything and not worry about any judgment now or later.

She calls me on my shit. Knows my H well and unfortunately we live far apart now and don't talk very much.

We emailed today and it was so nice to catch up (she’s been busy and traveling) any way in my email I said

The enormity of what he did consumes me for the most part and I don't know if I'm capable of forgiving him.

After I sent my long email, I thought, gosh - what did I just say? I usually don't really express myself in emails too much or even here.... oh, don't get me wrong I type TONS of stuff that I never submit, I edit, edit, edit and usually stick to simple things. but today, I felt in touch with her, even in email and I just went back and re-read it and now I wonder.... can I really really do this. Do I really really want to?

I'm doing an overnight on Saturday with another girlfriend. She is driving 4 ++ hours and mine is 90 minutes. It will be good for me to get away.

Sometimes I want to tell my parents (I NEVER DID) so I could factor in what kind of support that would mean and if it would change my way of thinking...

ok, I'm completely rambling now and my head is still splitting...

bye for now.


Posts: 289 | Registered: Nov 2008 | From: Way UpNorth, California
itspjw
♀ Member
Member # 21268
Default  Posted: 5:52 PM, April 1st (Wednesday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

still processing and too upset to post too much.

it's not another ow or another ons...it's just that there was more to the whole thing than he originally let on.


no, I can't take one more step towards you...cuz all that's waiting is regret...

there's just too much that time cannot erase

dday 9/11/08

And the more I know, the less I understand

Because of you...I am afraid...


Posts: 14786 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: Texas
dbjl
♀ Member
Member # 22878
Default  Posted: 9:42 PM, April 1st (Wednesday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Its))) If you need to talk, I'm here. PM me ... I'll send you a PM.

Take care.....


Posts: 216 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: The land of pain
ohpuhlease
♀ Member
Member # 13679
Default  Posted: 9:43 PM, April 1st (Wednesday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

its, I'm sorry hun. Hang in there.

dbjl, I'll have a margarita with you anytime. We can have a Jimmy Buffet party.

wh2m, I'm happy you're getting some time in with your friends. That helps alot.

My H has been home for the last week and will be leaving any day now. It sucks but it's his job.


Those who know others are intelligent. Those who know themselves are truly wise. - Lao-tzu, Tao Te Ching


Posts: 5714 | Registered: Feb 2007 | From: *Proudly Canadian...Eh!*
rainbowlittle
♀ Member
Member # 22334
Default  Posted: 2:41 AM, April 2nd (Thursday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Its)))
hope you doing a bit better...
I am feeling a bit better today.

New info is nasty anytime and especially we are so emotionally vulnerable now....all our beliefs are challenged...our esteem has taken a nose dive...
Every new thought seems all consuming..
please take heart...i send you strength ...you will be fine. We will hold your hands thru this..


Bad marriages don't cause infidelity; infidelity causes bad marriages.
-Frank Pittman


Posts: 88 | Registered: Jan 2009
itspjw
♀ Member
Member # 21268
Default  Posted: 11:16 AM, April 2nd (Thursday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

hi all. thanks for being there for me.

turns out he didn't tell the truth about a couple of details about the ons. claims it was because he couldn't remember, but who knows? we talked until the wee hours and i think we are going to be okay. we talked alot about what this does to my trust and our r and he promises to come to me with anything else he remembers before i ask about it again.

just got back from my physical, where i finally asked the dr. to do std tests. i'll get results within a couple days--but maybe monday since so close to weekend.

mc this afternnoon.

day has barely started and i'm already exhausted.


no, I can't take one more step towards you...cuz all that's waiting is regret...

there's just too much that time cannot erase

dday 9/11/08

And the more I know, the less I understand

Because of you...I am afraid...


Posts: 14786 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: Texas
Iwillrecover
♀ Member
Member # 22329
Default  Posted: 4:18 PM, April 2nd (Thursday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

its,

I'm glad to hear you're feeling a little better about the new info.

I hope your STD tests are OK.


Posts: 235 | Registered: Jan 2009
itspjw
♀ Member
Member # 21268
Default  Posted: 6:49 PM, April 2nd (Thursday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

posted in general...

mc went well. very, very good session.

i think we will get through this. it was a step (or ten) back, but i think it was necessary.

i'm completely drained now.


no, I can't take one more step towards you...cuz all that's waiting is regret...

there's just too much that time cannot erase

dday 9/11/08

And the more I know, the less I understand

Because of you...I am afraid...


Posts: 14786 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: Texas
Iwillrecover
♀ Member
Member # 22329
Default  Posted: 9:06 PM, April 2nd (Thursday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sometimes I don't know whether to post here or in "General".

I'm freaking out. Kinda starting another fight on ichat. I'm always starting fights since dday a couple of months ago. He's going out of town for the first time since dday. It happened when he was out of town. He also did it to his XW when out of town.

He assures me he really wants to change that he couldn't bare to lose me & he can never get away with anything with me anyway (I freakishly always find things out).

Due to the nature of his work he doesn't even know if it's one night or two or where they will go.

We may miss out on date night tomorrow night so were gonna have it tonight but now he has an old business associate in town for one night only that he really should see.

I want him to do what he needs to do business wise...I really do. It's just that I thought maybe tonight he could make me feel better about him going away. I guess he can't...nothing he could say or do could make me feel better.

edited for grammar

[This message edited by Iwillrecover at 9:07 PM, April 2nd (Thursday)]


Posts: 235 | Registered: Jan 2009
whathappenedtome
♀ Member
Member # 21695
Default  Posted: 9:45 PM, April 2nd (Thursday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((Iwill))

I know how you feel. Hope he figures out a good compromise that accomodates you and your feelings and his business.


Posts: 289 | Registered: Nov 2008 | From: Way UpNorth, California
ohpuhlease
♀ Member
Member # 13679
Default  Posted: 11:37 PM, April 2nd (Thursday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((Iwill)))))

It's never easy when they go out of town.

its, I'm happy MC went really well for you.


Those who know others are intelligent. Those who know themselves are truly wise. - Lao-tzu, Tao Te Ching


Posts: 5714 | Registered: Feb 2007 | From: *Proudly Canadian...Eh!*
itspjw
♀ Member
Member # 21268
Default  Posted: 11:20 AM, April 3rd (Friday), 2009View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((Iwill)))))

my h is a pilot, and goes out on a trip every week, (and slept with a flight attendant while on one) so i know what you are feeling.

will he be able to call and txt you frequently while he's gone?


no, I can't take one more step towards you...cuz all that's waiting is regret...

there's just too much that time cannot erase

dday 9/11/08

And the more I know, the less I understand

Because of you...I am afraid...


Posts: 14786 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: Texas
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