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I Can Relate     Print Topic    
User Topic: Long Term Affairs -V I I
Lost Heart
♀ Member
Member # 11515
Default  Posted: 10:29 AM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

BT, I was thinking about your statement where you said that you thought that your H would'nt dare do this to you.

I believed that H wouldnt dare do that to himself!
He always showed such contempt and disdain for my father, who was a LTA WH. Also, H made quite a deal about always playing fair,and being brutally honest and straight. It is so hard to believe that he was NEVER that man...maybe a long long time before he met OW1.

To have kept up this image for so long, must have taken aside from the arrogance and superior attitude, some pretty good acting skills.

How do I know now that I am not seeing those skills in action albeit in a different role?


Everyday is a winding road
I get a little bit closer
Everyday is a faded sign
I get a little bit closer to feeling fine

Posts: 2471 | Registered: Aug 2006 | From: London
hurtbuthappy
♀ Member
Member # 14539
Default  Posted: 10:45 AM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

LostH - Our H's all had great acting skills to remain in these relationships for so long.

That is one of the things I struggle with the most. How could he even look at himself in the mirror. Pretend to be this "good husband, good father".

He grew up with one of these "good" fathers and hated him because of his actions. So how could he turn around and do this and live with himself?

He can justify it all he wants. I will never understand it.


M-25 years
2 kids

Posts: 131 | Registered: May 2007
IMstrong
♀ Member
Member # 10637
Default  Posted: 11:19 AM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Triggering
Hi all, I realize I'm changing the subject a bit. I mostly come here and post when I need help, then I have to leave because I just can't move forward if I'm here reading all the time. So please excuse me, I have been reading here a few weeks because I slid back into despair, so there may be a more appropriate place to post this, but I feel comfortable here.

My H's A was long distance, so I never had to worry about him on a daily basis after DDay. His infidelity always took place while he was away. In the frst 3 months after DDay, he lied to "make things easier", then with the help of our MC, agreed to total honesty. A few weeks ago, I jokingly asked a question and got an honest answer. (apparently I had missed a question in my re-asking after his honesty pledge) She came to town once and got a hotel. He left our house, went to her, and came back. I know most of you had this experience during the whole A, but for me it was as devastating as a new DDay.

Funny thing is, in an over 3 year affair, I can pinpoint the moment he did it. I remember what he was wearing, I remember my confusion at his sudden departure, I remember the look on his face when I was asking if we could go with him,and I remember how relieved I was when he came home an hour later. He has confirmed that this was probably the day as his lie matches where he said he was going.

Anyway, last night he had to work late, which he frequently has to do. My car was in the shop, so I had his car. He got a ride home from work (I heard the guy make the offer as he was calling me to pick him up) An hour later he wasn't home and even though I know OW is thousands of miles away, I went to "that place". I texted him and he answered immediately with a street name. When he got home, he opened the topic by saying it must be hard for me when that happens, and explained that his ride had to pick his son up at a basketball game (and H saw my daughter's best friend there, so I could check if I wanted).

Fast forward to 4AM. So, my daughter has a cold, and H asked me to buy breathe right strips for her earlier in the day. I forgot. Daughter wakes up at 4AM. H realizes I didn't buy strips, so he gets mad and calls all over for a 24 hour drug store and goes to buy them. All I can think is, "I wonder if he used to call her and tell her whenever he's mad at me?" I took a Xanax and doped myself into sleep. I woke up to get the kids off to school, but went back to bed and was asleep when he left.

He is talking to me, and doesn't seem mad anymore ( a miracle since in the past he wouldn't speak to me for 3 days after something like that) but I just feel crappy.
We're 2 years out, done with MC, reconciling beautifully, but when shit like this happens, it just messes me up. I want to be over this already. I want to live a normal life without stupid shit sidelining me. Will I ever be over this? Will I fucking trigger for the rest of my life?

[This message edited by IMstrong at 11:24 AM, January 4th (Friday)]


Me BS
He FWS
LTA
DDay 2/20/2006
Reconciled

Posts: 76 | Registered: May 2006
OneToughCowgirl
♀ Member
Member # 14817
Default  Posted: 12:17 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

IM - Have you done any PTSD therapy? EMT or EMDR? That may be what you need for the triggering. I've also found a cognitive therapy-like script from a book called Feelings Buried Alive Never Die by Karol Truman - an excellent book for overcoming trauma and for physical/health issues. If you've done your IC and MC and are in good R this may be the missing piece for you. So many of us feel we have suffered from PTSD from this and it's rarely addressed by ICs or MCs. Just a thought. Sorry to hear you're in this place. It sucks.


M 20 years / together 25 yrs
6 yr LTA
Me 47
FWH 48
D-Day Jan. 2006
We're good and getting better every day!

Posts: 607 | Registered: May 2007 | From: Chicago
kelsey913
♀ Member
Member # 17605
Default  Posted: 12:23 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hurtbuthappy, I so think that my husband got off easily. He says he's so happy now, now that it's over and we're working on our marriage. Yes, the marriage is going better than ever because he's a willing participant and not preoccupied. As the BS, I believe we carry the brundt of the work, healing from this nightmare and working on the marriage. Some days, it's pretty hard to tend to his needs when all I want to do is slap him.

I look at this man that I have been with for 30 years and ask myself if I even know him. I don't trust him and I certainly don't trust my judgement right now either. Both have failed me miserably.


Me - BS
Him - WH
5 Yr LTA
D-Day 8/5/07
Married 28 Years
R

Posts: 90 | Registered: Jan 2008
IMstrong
♀ Member
Member # 10637
Default  Posted: 12:33 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Cowgirl, what is EMT and EMDR? I'm off to my library's website to request that book, thanks. And, no, I have never had any PTSD counseling.
I hesitate to even approach my MC cause I feel like I should be over this by now. I feel like a whiny baby continuing to have issues.


Me BS
He FWS
LTA
DDay 2/20/2006
Reconciled

Posts: 76 | Registered: May 2006
IMstrong
♀ Member
Member # 10637
Default  Posted: 12:45 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

kelsey and hurtbut, my H tells me that there were so many times that he almost drove himself into a tree while on his way home. He felt so horrible about what he was doing, and unable to get out, that he would almost rather die than have to face me. He also suffered from insomnia almost the whole A, and only started sleeping through the night after DDay.

Yes, I'm sure he had some "fun" during his A, but he did his suffereing during, and when he finally ended it, he became unburdened just as I received the burden of discovery and betrayal.
I try to remind myself of that when I feel resentful that he is so carefree. I have to remind myself, because he doesn't like to remember how he felt.

I have asked him to share some of those feelings with me as he tells me things. Like my recent discovery a few posts back about the hotel. He was being factual, and I had to ask him how it made him feel. I found out some things that helped me handle the truth because it wasn't as I imagined.


Me BS
He FWS
LTA
DDay 2/20/2006
Reconciled

Posts: 76 | Registered: May 2006
OneToughCowgirl
♀ Member
Member # 14817
Default  Posted: 12:48 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

IM - My mistake - it's actually EFT which stands for Emotional Freedom Technique. It's a series of tapping motions you do on certain pressure points in the body that hold emotion. Sounds wacky but it works and is widely used in many therapy modalities not. You can go to the developer's website at www.emofree.com to learn more. EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. You can learn more at www.emdr.com . And as far as feeling like a whiney baby and being reluctant to contact your MC or IC - get over that one IM!This road is a bitch to walk and you have to treat it as if you've been through a horrific trauma. I don't think any of us will EVER be "over it". This is a life long process of healing perhaps. There has been a major trauma to your life, your sense of safety, you sense of being and sense of self. This is not to be taken lightly or looked upon like there is a time limit for getting over it. GET THE HELP YOU NEED IM!!!! And don't buy into anyone telling you or making you feel like you should be over it. It's also like a death of a loved one. People who have not been through it feel like you should be "over it" in a prescribed time when those who have been through it know that the process is different for everyone and you don't ever really get over it. Anyhow, I can't stess this enough - LTA discovery and revelation is a dramatic and deep trauma and should be looked at and treated as such.
Let me know if you need any additional info IM.


M 20 years / together 25 yrs
6 yr LTA
Me 47
FWH 48
D-Day Jan. 2006
We're good and getting better every day!

Posts: 607 | Registered: May 2007 | From: Chicago
IMstrong
♀ Member
Member # 10637
Default  Posted: 12:55 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks Cowgirl, I am heading to those sites right now...

Your post brought tears to my eyes. My MC is wonderful, she really is, but at one of my last sessions where I was talking about obsessive thoughts about OW, my MC mentioned that she had never been through what I had, so she couldn't imagine what I was going through. Since then, I haven't felt the same sense of safety in her office. I know she didn't mean it this way, but the message I got was that she was one of the lucky ones who could say their husband had been faithful. I almost felt like she was thanking God that she wasn't me.
Thanks again, I will read up on those therapies you gave me.


Me BS
He FWS
LTA
DDay 2/20/2006
Reconciled

Posts: 76 | Registered: May 2006
weepy
♀ Member
Member # 8790
Default  Posted: 2:28 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I hesitate to even approach my MC cause I feel like I should be over this by now. I feel like a whiny baby continuing to have issues.

Waving hand in air, hello, whiny baby here! IM, anything can set me off. I've found the meds I'm on help a lot. My H seems to let things go easier than he did in the past and I surely wonder the same thing as you... did he run off to her when he would stomp out the door during an argument.

I too have a "date" that I know my H was with someone. I remember vividly the conversation, what he was wearing, where we were. I remember being confused at his departure and not buying his explanation. Just thinking about that can set me off down the weepy road again.

I understand the reluctance to talk to THAT MC any more. How about an IC just for you?


Dday: 9/12/05
M: 29 yrs( me anyway )
BS(me): 55 And I'm ok with that
FWS: 57- Multiple PAs, LTA 7? yrs.

Try not. Do or do not, there is no try. -- Yoda


Posts: 9340 | Registered: Nov 2005 | From: SE PA
IMstrong
♀ Member
Member # 10637
Default  Posted: 2:55 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks weepy. It's soooo good to hear from others who feel the same. Maybe I should hang here a little more, I feel so much less alone already.

I feel like no one knows who I am anymore. NO ONE in my life knows what happened, only our priest and MC. I was so humiliated I didn't tell anyone. I belonged to a board like this, but for travel, and made some great friendships, but can't feel as though I fit in anymore because there is a huge part of me that I keep hidden.

I won't even open up here, because as slim as the chances are, what if OW is here and can see from details in my posts that I am who I am? That's why my profile is blank. Ugh.

I was afraid hanging out here would keep me ruminating on things, obsessing over it, but maybe trying to go on without letting my feelings out is not the way to go either.

Thanks for listening


Me BS
He FWS
LTA
DDay 2/20/2006
Reconciled

Posts: 76 | Registered: May 2006
weepy
♀ Member
Member # 8790
Default  Posted: 3:29 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I was afraid hanging out here would keep me ruminating on things, obsessing over it, but maybe trying to go on without letting my feelings out is not the way to go either.

Even my IC was afraid of that. I told her last session that there's no onein the "real" world who knows how I feel. I told her to back off, I wasn't leaving here. I have told one dear friend. She's my oldest friend and her H and mine are also close. They have not changed how they act around my H one iota, although they are quite concerned about how our M is going. See if my H had even mentioned the "issue" to this guy, he would have set him straight, but H didn't want any advice that would steer him toward home.

I know his OW is not here, she's dead. At least this one is. I don't know if there were more other than the pros. I have spilled details except names, where we live, except in PMs to people who have become dear friends.

I don't know about you, but I don't bring up anything about the As any more with my H, my fears, my doubts, my insecurities are all held inside. He probably thinks I'm healed, I know if I get the least bit upset about anything he asks if I took my meds... like they're some kind of magic memory clearers.

I wish I could ask my H about specifics, like that night.. he just says he doesn't remember. Which is a lie, he doesn't want to tell me. If he would just get over that, we could be so much further along.


Dday: 9/12/05
M: 29 yrs( me anyway )
BS(me): 55 And I'm ok with that
FWS: 57- Multiple PAs, LTA 7? yrs.

Try not. Do or do not, there is no try. -- Yoda


Posts: 9340 | Registered: Nov 2005 | From: SE PA
mumto3sat
♀ Member
Member # 14336
Default  Posted: 3:36 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Im strong, my ow actually posted on here a couple of times and it really really put me off going into any details, but now I think if she is still stupid enough to want to read what I have to say then more fool her, this is for ME not her and if I want to write on here I will. I'm fed up of being scared.

But I don't always post because sometimes I feel I need to just get on with things, at the moment is not one of those times unfortunately. I just don't know that I can do it. I really don't. He's so self-centred. It's not selfishness exactly, he just doesn't think of anyone else. We're supposed to be going to Mexico on Sunday for a holiday, no kids for the first time in years and I just can't look forward to it. I don't want to be with him, I'm so angry. I feel so crap about myself and its all because of him. Why the hell should I be with him?

Anyway, well done Lost Heart on the job, that really is fantastic news! I'm so so pleased for you.

Funny Love Actually should be mentioned as that was on tv at Christmas and I watchedit with H for the first time and at that scene where she breaks down when she realises her H is having an affair H tuned to me and said sorry, because he could see how crushed she was and it instantly reminded him of how I still am. She acted it so well and I can't help feeling that she has to have known this in real life, you can't fake that.

I'm really sorry Soggy for what you are now going through. It really really sucks. Thinking of you.

Found a song on H's backup drive today called "H and OW Wedding song"
She used to make CD's for him with all sorts of songs from mushy stuff to ethnic music to all sorts but this one gets my goat! I know you all told me months back about OW's and I went some way to defending mine, but I am beginning to see the deliberateness of what she did, again H lied to her too and I don't absolve him of anything and I still fervently believe he is more at fault than her, but what a wicked witch she is for thinking what she did was ok, for makiing her one and only aim removing three baby's father. She still lives with her mum and dad at the age of 30! How dare she think that my children would be ok without their dad and the youngest was only 14 weeks old at the time!!! She can't live without hers but mine would be ok without theirs. Nice girl. I still feel sorry for her in some respects, ie. that she has so little self esteem that she thinks someone else's husband is ok to pursue, but I no longer feel she was the innocent in all this. She knew exactly what she was doing and she carried on anyway. It's a good job I just can't be bothered to be angry at her. I could do some serious damage to her life, but she's just not worth it. H definately traded down.

I'm sorry so many of us are in the anger place at the moment. hopefully things will improve.

BT I hope you manage to sort something out over the job. Congratulations!


Me (BS): 38
Him (WS): 38
3 children, d 6 s 4 s 1yr
D day #1 03/16/07 8 mth ea
D day #2 07/13/07 turned into 7 year long term affair, pa/ea 08/18/07 Got final info - is that it?

Posts: 284 | Registered: Apr 2007 | From: UK
Lost Heart
♀ Member
Member # 11515
Default  Posted: 4:04 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

IM, Please try to get into IC.
My IC taught me some EFT and I tell you, it DID help me get through the holidays. I also did some in the waiting room before me interview! LOL.
EMDT can also help. IC is for YOU. And dont stress about triggering 2 years out. I know others here do so too. You are where you are. Stick around some ok?

Mum, nice to see you.
How about using the holiday in Mexico for you? See it as time away from this crappy weather, from the kids, some place where you can bask in the sun, find some inner peace, catch up on reading, and do some shopping (yes, I had to throw. that in!). It doesnt have to be about you and H, if you dont want it to. Just some chilling time to start the new year out. Have fun!

I look at this man that I have been with for 30 years and ask myself if I even know him. I don't trust him and I certainly don't trust my judgement right now either. Both have failed me miserably.

Kelsey, we all have said this at some point since dday.

weepy,

I know if I get the least bit upset about anything he asks if I took my meds... like they're some kind of magic memory clearers.


If only.

Am struggling abit today. Its been awhile since I had a meltdown, and I dont know specifically what triggered me. Could be so many things, as there have been little and not so little stuff triggering me the past few weeks, but I have been stuffing them down, cos I was so scared of spoiling the holidays and I promised my IC that I wouldnt tackle any issues in this time, as I woiuld be on my own. I cant wait for my next session (next week).

Sometimes I just hate him. I really do. I want to wipe the smirk from his face.He says its not a smirk, thats how he looks.
Just sometimes, just for a little while, I wish he could hurt just like I do..but I know that he is incapable of that.


Everyday is a winding road
I get a little bit closer
Everyday is a faded sign
I get a little bit closer to feeling fine

Posts: 2471 | Registered: Aug 2006 | From: London
BorrowTrouble
♀ Member
Member # 2435
Default  Posted: 5:02 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh boy. Talk about a trigger.

My H is pretty much a dead ringer for George Michael, and George Michael was one of OWs favorites. She gave him copies of his music, and he brought that home to me, and we listened to it together. bastard.

I know this is childish, but I hope she has had the most miserable fucking life possible.


D-day 7/29/04.

Posts: 5711 | Registered: Oct 2003
mumto3sat
♀ Member
Member # 14336
Default  Posted: 6:02 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

BT!!!! Lucky lucky you (said with tongue in cheek). George Michael eh! Lost Heart and I were both going to grow up and marry him (or so we thought when we were teenagers) Of course now we know that wouldn't have worked out too well.......



Me (BS): 38
Him (WS): 38
3 children, d 6 s 4 s 1yr
D day #1 03/16/07 8 mth ea
D day #2 07/13/07 turned into 7 year long term affair, pa/ea 08/18/07 Got final info - is that it?

Posts: 284 | Registered: Apr 2007 | From: UK
numb and scared
♀ Member
Member # 9908
Default  Posted: 6:15 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I know this is childish, but I hope she has had the most miserable fucking life possible.

BT,
Can't tell you how many times I have wished that on the OW POS.

True is....I know where she works, and amazingly small world that it is...I even know the director..a person
who would NOT look the other way if I exposed her. I could very definitely get her fired...and it has been very tempting. Who knows...there may be a trigger along this path that just may put me over the edge on that.

Her crimes are not just about shagging my H and feeding her ego with his attention....she exploited a very serious
family crisis with one of our kids and used that as an excuse to get back in touch after 2 other of our children
had exposed them both.
She also stepped up her demands when she KNEW I was onsite with my dying mother.
The day of my mother's funeral her voicemails were insistent that he leave.....
" She needed him."

I have never "hated" anyone like I do her. If there is a God who deals out justice, she will get hers..somehow, someway.

IM,
Stay on if you want...
I am almost 2 years out....most days I have a handle on things. God knows, there has been 24 months of introspection and grief, along with other non-A related events and challenges...but triggers are still ever flirting at the fringes of my vision and memory.

This just isn't something that "goes away"......eventually you just get used to the feelings. And it is crucial that you engage in whatever therapy (concepts) feel right for you. Cowgirl made some excellent suggestions.
Hugs

[This message edited by numb and scared at 6:16 PM, January 4th (Friday)]


BS
LTA
"Lying is the strongest acknowledgement of the force of truth."
- William Hazlitt
"Let us move on, and step out boldly, though it be into the night, and we can scarcely see the way."
-Charles B. Newcomb



Posts: 3958 | Registered: Feb 2006 | From:
zanny
♀ Member
Member # 13183
Default  Posted: 7:05 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I know this is childish, but I hope she has had the most miserable fucking life possible.

If it's childish, then I am right there on the playground with you. I have nothing but ill wishes for her. To me, these OW are just the male version of the sociopath. Sure, their crimes don't land them in jail because they aren't evident, but in the female world, it doesn't get any LOWER than this.

I have never "hated" anyone like I do her. If there is a God who deals out justice, she will get hers..somehow, someway.

Oh yeah Numb, you are singing my song. I have never "hated" anyone either. I never understood it. Well, I guess I do now.


BS-Me
WS-Him
D-day #1 LTA
False Reconciliation then
D-day #2
In reconciliation


"Just when the caterpillar thought it was over, she became a butterfly."


Posts: 573 | Registered: Jan 2007 | From: The Middle of Somewhere
OneToughCowgirl
♀ Member
Member # 14817
Default  Posted: 7:32 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well you girls know I'm not going to sit on the sidelines with my six shooters in my holster when the OW venom starts flowing. If it's childish BT then give me a rattle and a highchair! I have no apologies for the hatred I feel. These bitches were predatory and deliberate! And when I hear IM say she doesn't feel like she can open up here because OW may be stalking her here in the only place she has to heal from her predatory attempts at stealing her fucking life? Well, it makes me a little crazy (only showing the whites of my eyes right now and foaming at the mouth. )And Mum, so glad to hear you are seeing a different aspect of the OW in your sitch. When that whore followed you in here and we all smelled her out right away I wanted her address! It's not just the SOW in my sitch I hate - I have a blanket hatred now for ALL of them after seeing and hearing all the pain here in SI!

I'm firing up girls! Hold me back don't turn me loose!

Don't know if any of you have had the stomach to watch "I Think I Love My Wife" I love Chris Rock and finally got the nerve to watch it the other day (since I've rented every single other movie on digital TV over the holidays and this was the only one left) Anyhow, it was of course an exagerated version of how a basically happily married man who is dealing with midlife questioning and a lack of excitement and fulfillment in the old sex dept. gets led astray by a predatory whore. I found it fascinating! It really showed the dynamics of a husband who begins that self talk of justification and the OW pushing and weaving her web while he convinced himself he deserved more. It also showed the self talk the H's use to diminish the wife. The only slumper for me was that just when he's about to cross the line sexually he has a moment of conscience and chickens out. If only........ I think they should have probably showed what happens in MOST cases and showed him boning her then compartmentalizing, then lying, then gaslighting, then DDay, then chaos, pain and destruction. Perhaps that would keep a few flies zippered up this winter!

I have never "hated" anyone like I do her. If there is a God who deals out justice, she will get hers..somehow, someway.
I just hope God will let us watch..... it would be sooooo good to see the karma bus screeching around the corner and BAM!

OK, back to happy thoughts, happy thoughts, happy thoughts....... see, I'm really working on my anger issues.


M 20 years / together 25 yrs
6 yr LTA
Me 47
FWH 48
D-Day Jan. 2006
We're good and getting better every day!

Posts: 607 | Registered: May 2007 | From: Chicago
Feeling so alone
♀ Member
Member # 14492
Default  Posted: 8:07 PM, January 4th (Friday), 2008View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

O.K. girls, I'm PMSing and my pisstivity is flying high. And now ya'll have opened up the door to an ow vent. Although I'd rather do a H vent, but I would feel so guilty after all my good talk the last couple of days. H has kind of rubbed me wrong today, and like I said, the PMS has got a hold to me, so I think I'll just take it out on ALL ow.

You bunch of worthless bitches. I so hope that there are actually some ow lurching in here, 'cause I've got plenty to say to you. You only wanted and tried to be like us for years. You never stood a chance. If our H's ever loved any freaking thing about you do you think that they would be on their knees now begging us to give them one more chance. Hell ya'll could not even show your true feelings about shit to our H's b/c you know they would have been out the door and never ever looked back at your skanky ass. While we as the wives can now rant and rave and do any Fing thing we want and they will take it and thank us. You stupid bunch of skanks. The only hold you had on any of our H's was your damn nasty hole. Have you not figured out yet that there is a hell of alot more to life than that. Probably not. Let's see do I want to be a wife that is loved and cherished and kept no matter how bad it gets or do I want to be nothing more than a hole that is dumped as soon as that hole threatens my ability to stay with my loved wife. You bunch of dumb asses. Just WTF did you think you were ever going to gain. Our lives. NOT. You damn sure didn't get it did you.

Please somebody stop me. My keyboard is trying to run away from me.

Sorry but I had to let that PMS and pisstivity out somewhere didn't I.

Now ya'll all get your 2x4's out and bat away at me for being so mean and nasty when I've been so good here lately.

OH BTW. Welcome Kelsey. I'm not always like this. Just most of the time.

FSA


Together we're working through an LTA

If a man says something in the woods and there's not a woman there to hear it, is he still wrong?


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