Topic: Tactical Primer
Member # 12233
| Posted: 1:57 PM, May 27th (Tuesday), 2008|
Great. I always feel so bad that I can't touch base with with all the new people all the time--there are just too many (sad, huh??)--but this is a fantastic first read for anyone in this situation
Be a lion, not a mowess...
The Cowardly Lion
Posts: 11300 | Registered: Oct 2006 | From: A whole 'nother country
Member # 14993
| Posted: 12:38 PM, June 4th (Wednesday), 2008|
Me: BH - Happily remarried.
Hope is never lost. It exists within you - it is real. It is not a force in and of itself - it is something that you create with every thought, action, and choice you make. It is a gift that you create for yourself.
Posts: 17109 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Further North than South
Member # 16197
| Posted: 9:03 PM, June 4th (Wednesday), 2008|
"Forgiveness is the grace by which you enable the other person to get up, and get up with dignity, to begin anew" Desmond Tutu
Posts: 2170 | Registered: Sep 2007
Member # 18437
| Posted: 10:11 PM, June 4th (Wednesday), 2008|
Me - BS 42
Kids 12 and 9
Posts: 1846 | Registered: Mar 2008 | From: NY
Member # 19777
| Posted: 2:47 PM, June 5th (Thursday), 2008|
Thanx... very helpful. A must read.
An angel is someone you feel like you've known forever
even though you've just met.
Posts: 67 | Registered: Jun 2008
Member # 15330
| Posted: 9:25 PM, June 5th (Thursday), 2008|
So well written! Nice job. I vote for this to go into the Healing library....just sayin.....
Married 8 years, together 11
BS(me)-34 FWH-37 d-day 7/3/07
Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.
Let your clarity define you.
"Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable." ~The Wizard
Posts: 1476 | Registered: Jul 2007 | From: New York
Member # 16571
| Posted: 1:46 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2008|
WOW. what a great, great post.
Las cosas no son como las vemos sino como las recordamos
Posts: 113 | Registered: Oct 2007 | From: Mexico
Member # 18943
| Posted: 7:49 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2008|
I will survive....
Posts: 1154 | Registered: Apr 2008
Member # 17210
| Posted: 5:27 PM, June 7th (Saturday), 2008|
Bumping for newbies as it slips off the front page.
Your mileage may vary... in accordance with the prophecy.
Do not back up. Severe tire damage.
Posts: 14924 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Winnipeg
Member # 16891
| Posted: 6:17 PM, June 7th (Saturday), 2008|
Just caught this. I'll be a proud bumper for it.
I may have not gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.
- Douglas Adams
Posts: 4965 | Registered: Nov 2007
Member # 14742
| Posted: 7:35 AM, June 8th (Sunday), 2008|
bumping up another great post.
Me BS 44
Him WS 45
sons :17, 16
dday1: 6/1996..separated 1.5yr, then reconciled 1/1998
Separated at last!~10/31/2008
But he lost his job in April..so pending, pending, pending.
Posts: 280 | Registered: May 2007 | From: ohio
Member # 19433
| Posted: 2:56 PM, June 8th (Sunday), 2008|
Thanks for much for this. I`m one year on from exposing WS`s affair but he still works with the OW and living with him has been an emotional rollercoaster for the past year.
Learning a lot from SI though. Was pointed in the direction of this thread just today and am so glad!
Posts: 66 | Registered: May 2008
Member # 10617
| Posted: 9:35 PM, June 8th (Sunday), 2008|
< bump > for new friends
Him(WTFH):51 Married: 05/26/2002
DD#1: 09/2005 (EA) DD#2: 09/2006
Mini-DDays: Many. Mostly online
It's not what you've got, it's what you give.
It ain't the life you choose, it's the life you live
Posts: 6401 | Registered: May 2006 | From: Michigan
Member # 16928
| Posted: 11:13 PM, June 9th (Monday), 2008|
Me:BW Him: FWH E/A
M: 29 years, together 36 : both guilty of PAs 20+ years ago
CDay#1 Oct 06 (false); DDay#2 Oct 07 (truth from OW's BH)
R: Tenaciously optimistic
Posts: 843 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Midwest
Member # 17062
| Posted: 8:11 AM, June 10th (Tuesday), 2008|
Yet another one from SerJR.
Yet again, I wish I had found this place earlier.
D-Day: 30 July 2006 LTA: 5yrs
Me, BS, 57 y/o Him, WS, 58 y/o
MOW, pathetic ex-fiancee.
3 grown boys and one 19 y/o
I don't consider myself married anymore.
There are some words once spoken split the world in two. Before you say them and after.
Posts: 3498 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: UK
Member # 6449
| Posted: 12:34 PM, June 10th (Tuesday), 2008|
Fabulous post SerJR!!! I just wish I'd have had this when I first started down this road, completely lost and shattered. You're WORD!!!!
~~"You can't run away from yourself"!!! Me to my H when he descended into adultery insanity.
~~Prov.15:13 "By sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken"
~~"The day breaks-your mind aches"
Posts: 9992 | Registered: Feb 2005 | From: Texas
♀ New Member
Member # 19648
| Posted: 12:41 PM, June 12th (Thursday), 2008|
Thanks so much for steering me here! What great words or advice & wisdom!
BS (Me) - 38
WS (Him) - 43
2 DD ages 10 & 5
Married 2 1/2 yrs., Together 10
11/19/07 - "I just don't love you anymore. I want a divorce."
12/21/07 - DDay confirming OW
Working on R
Posts: 8 | Registered: May 2008
Member # 18277
| Posted: 9:10 PM, June 12th (Thursday), 2008|
This is perfect, and just the reminder I needed to remain focused.
I use to think my self-respect was being prideful. This reminds me, it isn't, it is a necessity!
BSO - 35
Together 5 yrs.
OC Born 11/2012
DD born 01/2014
I still love him but what I miss the most is the peace I felt loving him without the fear.
Posts: 2201 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: AZ
Member # 19862
| Posted: 11:50 PM, June 12th (Thursday), 2008|
Had I known all this, 9 years ago, hell, 13 years ago, things would have been very different.
There is so much anger and resentment built up now - I don't know if there will be a reconciliation.
Stronger than reason, stronger than lies, the only truth I know, is the look in your eyes.
BH(42) FWW(41; 8+ OM/OW, 5 year LTA)
M: 16yrs, 2 kids DS16, DD13. d-day 6/17/2008 (after 9 months of MC+gaslighting).
Posts: 4898 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: CA
Member # 17400
| Posted: 1:03 PM, June 13th (Friday), 2008|
Needs to be on pg1.
D-Day Dec 9, 2007
D final Oct 19th 2010
Posts: 2585 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: in a van down by the river
|Topic Posts: 870|