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Wayward Side Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Helpful Books for WSes
Hope24
♀ Member
Member # 9344
Default  Posted: 2:02 PM, July 29th (Thursday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


She packed up her potential and all she had learned and headed out to change a few things.

Posts: 7605 | Registered: Jan 2006 | From: Poolside
Hope24
♀ Member
Member # 9344
Default  Posted: 9:30 AM, August 2nd (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bumping for CrushedHim.


She packed up her potential and all she had learned and headed out to change a few things.

Posts: 7605 | Registered: Jan 2006 | From: Poolside
wincings_sparkle
♀ Member
Member # 27129
Default  Posted: 11:29 PM, September 3rd (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


"When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free."
- Catherine Ponder
Me-FWW. BH-wincing_at_light

Posts: 1594 | Registered: Jan 2010
HUFI-PUFI
♂ Member
Member # 25460
Default  Posted: 7:55 AM, September 30th (Thursday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump


Donít listen to your head, itís easily confused. Donít listen to your heart, its fickle. Listen to your soul, God doesn't steer you wrong.

Posts: 3230 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: Azilda, Northern Ontario
HUFI-PUFI
♂ Member
Member # 25460
Default  Posted: 7:24 AM, October 28th (Thursday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This gets bumped because I wanted to add another book.

The Ten Things to Do When Your Life DFalls Apart by Daphne Rose Kingma.

Inpsirational and instructional. Which are they way that good books should be. A good mixture of homilies for self healing for both the WS and the BS.


Donít listen to your head, itís easily confused. Donít listen to your heart, its fickle. Listen to your soul, God doesn't steer you wrong.

Posts: 3230 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: Azilda, Northern Ontario
Fallen
♀ Member
Member # 4313
Default  Posted: 9:52 PM, October 31st (Sunday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bumping for a new member.


You can't heal what you won't feel.

"There would be no grand absolution, only forgiveness meted out in these precious sips. It would well up from his heart in spoonfuls, and he would feed it to me. And it would be enough."


Posts: 23481 | Registered: May 2004
Lost68
♂ Member
Member # 27515
Default  Posted: 2:50 PM, November 12th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bump

Posts: 1476 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Sevilla
Fallen
♀ Member
Member # 4313
Default  Posted: 9:32 PM, December 3rd (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


You can't heal what you won't feel.

"There would be no grand absolution, only forgiveness meted out in these precious sips. It would well up from his heart in spoonfuls, and he would feed it to me. And it would be enough."


Posts: 23481 | Registered: May 2004
WhatHaveIDone??
♀ Member
Member # 30054
Default  Posted: 5:39 PM, December 5th (Sunday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What a wonderful thread! This should be a permanent bump on the Wayward side! Any chance of getting this added to the Healing Library so it is always readily available?

Thank you to everyone for the input. I have read some and will add others to my list.


Posts: 342 | Registered: Nov 2010
hurtful
♂ New Member
Member # 30173
Default  Posted: 7:36 PM, December 5th (Sunday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

1DLW
Where did you get audio version, I have major attention issues and have a hard time reading, but have had great luck with audio books. I would love to get this.
Thanks.

Posts: 19 | Registered: Nov 2010
WhatHaveIDone??
♀ Member
Member # 30054
Default  Posted: 9:10 PM, December 13th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bump for nohonor.

Posts: 342 | Registered: Nov 2010
HUFI-PUFI
♂ Member
Member # 25460
Default  Posted: 8:52 AM, December 17th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I know that I am not the only WS who has issues with the fights in our marriage. Itís not just arguments over the A but at times, it seems like all disagreements turn into arguments which ten escalate into fights and it seems that they just donít end until she storms off and I sit there in stony silence wondering what the fuck?

ihurtforher - One thing that I struggle with is that when we have an argument, often times we both get angry and end up saying things that we later regret. I would like to quell these situations before they escalate, but it is difficult when we start to get into an emotion overload.

Well, I found a book recently that promises a way to defuse the situation and turn the fight back into a discussion by encouraging you to deal with the ďtrue underlyingĒ cause of the hurt and anger and fear that these fights reveal about you.

Talk to Me Like Iím Someone You Love: Relationship Repair in a Flash by Nancy Dreyfus.

Iím only one chapter into the book but not unlike other books like 5 love languages, this one too seems to be one of those ďahaĒ books that make sense from the moment that you pick it up. Yesterday as we argued over the Christmas decorations, the advice from chapter one is what allowed me to defuse the situation with ease and get us back on track. Canít wait to read the whole damn book.

HUFI

[This message edited by HUFI-PUFI at 12:57 PM, December 17th (Friday)]


Donít listen to your head, itís easily confused. Donít listen to your heart, its fickle. Listen to your soul, God doesn't steer you wrong.

Posts: 3230 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: Azilda, Northern Ontario
WhatHaveIDone??
♀ Member
Member # 30054
Default  Posted: 2:06 PM, December 30th (Thursday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bump for new SIers.

Posts: 342 | Registered: Nov 2010
Lost68
♂ Member
Member # 27515
Default  Posted: 12:31 PM, January 2nd (Sunday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bump

Posts: 1476 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Sevilla
WhatHaveIDone??
♀ Member
Member # 30054
Default  Posted: 8:26 PM, January 5th (Wednesday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bump again..

Posts: 342 | Registered: Nov 2010
Fallen
♀ Member
Member # 4313
Default  Posted: 7:55 PM, February 6th (Sunday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage



You can't heal what you won't feel.

"There would be no grand absolution, only forgiveness meted out in these precious sips. It would well up from his heart in spoonfuls, and he would feed it to me. And it would be enough."


Posts: 23481 | Registered: May 2004
noheroes
♂ New Member
Member # 31064
Default  Posted: 12:28 AM, February 7th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Highly, highly recommend When Things Fall Apart by Pema Chodron.


http://www.amazon.com/When-Things-Fall-Apart-Difficult/dp/1570629692/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1297060045&sr=8-1


Posts: 4 | Registered: Feb 2011
HUFI-PUFI
♂ Member
Member # 25460
Default  Posted: 9:44 AM, March 10th (Thursday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It was time to bump this back to the front where it might be read again and the wisdom in it shared once more. BUMP!


Donít listen to your head, itís easily confused. Donít listen to your heart, its fickle. Listen to your soul, God doesn't steer you wrong.

Posts: 3230 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: Azilda, Northern Ontario
Fallen
♀ Member
Member # 4313
Default  Posted: 9:07 PM, March 16th (Wednesday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


You can't heal what you won't feel.

"There would be no grand absolution, only forgiveness meted out in these precious sips. It would well up from his heart in spoonfuls, and he would feed it to me. And it would be enough."


Posts: 23481 | Registered: May 2004
Clarrissa
♀ Member
Member # 21886
Default  Posted: 6:33 AM, March 19th (Saturday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'd like to add a recommendation for new, remorseful WS.

I just finished reading How To Help Your Spouse Heal From Your Affair by Linda MacDonald.

It's great for those who really don't like to read. Only about 100 pages. A WS doesn't get the impression that the book is trying to psychoanalyze them somehow (which is admittedly why I haven't read some of the other recommendations). It gets straight to the point: THIS is what you need to do to have the best chance of repairing your M. THIS is what your BS needs. THIS is the best way to handle a certain situation.

I found it very helpful because it also lists some "predetermining factors". It listed a few things that it never occurred to me as being such. So it can also be the source of "aha" moments as well.

(Thank you to GeauxTiger for the recommendation. My H saw it on his thread and decided to check it out. )


BH Cee64D - 48
WW (me) - 49


All affairs are variations on a theme. No one has 'Beethoven's 5th' to everyone else's 'Chopsticks'.


Posts: 5879 | Registered: Dec 2008 | From: A better place
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