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User Topic: Long Term Affair X V I I
booger bear
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Member # 26584
Content  Posted: 2:03 PM, March 14th (Sunday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm going to participate in this marriage to the extent I fell safe doing so. I realize this will be a very superficial relationship & one that will, in time, become unsatisfying to me. I'm doing so with eyes wide open.

this is it !!!!! your whole post is great and so profound and what you need to do ...

BUT .... you gotta know there will be days when you cannot or will not do those things ... there will be days when you feel like you back at square 1 d-day all over again ...

as long as you realize that and know that it will not last forever and get a plan of action together for when these do happen ... support, friends, shopping whatever ...

don't fight those days it just makes em worse in my opinion ... let em happen and use your plan of action for em and go on ... KWIM ???

and when you are having super good days ... go out and be empowered do things to help you on those days you need help ... set yourself up for success ...

you are on the right tract allgood and you sound strong in your 180 ...


I am fiercely independent and I won’t apologize for it. I'd rather be single than settled.

Posts: 18711 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Here, but not there ...
iwantamiracle
♀ Member
Member # 22812
Default  Posted: 2:17 PM, March 14th (Sunday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

allgood i agree with booger 100%...your post was awesome...i agree with the what to expect stuff too...

you have come such a long way, keep being proactive in your healing...it is so inspiring to see....

yay for you allgood...yay for you...

do you feel somewhat empowered by your post?...i hope so...


i am taking my life back, one step at a time!!!!!

Posts: 5994 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: looking for my rainbow
old dipstick
♂ Member
Member # 25598
Default  Posted: 11:00 AM, March 15th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Tribe.

Well this is the big week. If I have my facts straight, m3 is going to have her girl Wednesday! I will be thinking about her.

Wow, it looks like you gals had a pretty good problem solving session Sat & Sun. Good stuff.

About the AP's phyical appearance. In my case the OM#1 and me were probably about equal. I was never able to meet up with the other two OM. My W swore up and down that both were inferior to me. When she first confessed this to her best girl friend she told her the same. I pretty much think she is being honest about that part. Of course all this info is suspect. If this is true she traded down appearance wise. It really makes no difference. They got what they wanted and she got what she wanted, or what she thought she wanted.
She said this about OM#2, "some people know how to say all the right things." She says that she knew him for a long time, that he kept after her, and that he finally got to her in a time of increased vunerability. I wonder. If he had been much better looking would he have hooked her quicker? I would think that it would be a little bit easier to lower your self to having a affair if the AP was superior to the BS in appearance. That is about the only way that I see appearance factoring into this. She was probably going to do it anyway, no matter what the AP looked like.

It is so hard to think that this is not about you. We BSs were spending all that time only thinking about our WS. It was all we knew. How could they go through life not thinking about us part of the time? It is hard to wrap our mind around that.

miracle.

I would be remiss if I did not thank you for your Saturday night commentary concerning the mind/penis.
That was very interesting and informative. Are you planing to give equal time with a follow up lecture concerning the mind/vagina? Some of us might find that subject interesting too.

Hugs to the tribe.


Her WW 60
Me BH 60
M 36 yr
D-day#1 fall of 76 OM#1 2NS
D-day#2 summer of 89 OM#2 LTA 8 yrs OM#3 Short Term A


Posts: 751 | Registered: Sep 2009
trynhard
♂ Member
Member # 22698
Default  Posted: 11:06 AM, March 15th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I had a wonderful time this weekend.

Dip... thanks for the encouragement about thinking about my W's A everyday. Twenty-five years ago, my W chose this prayer at our ceremony Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Sometimes, when my mind struggles with hate and sadness, remembering what has happened to me… I think about that prayer… and all I can do is follow it myself and make the choice myself to love my W.


Allgoodnamesgone… as you describe your thought and feelings.. I have traveled the path you are on… A suggestion. My W and I don’t do this any more everyday, but sometimes on occasions. And of course, it was my suggestion and I was the one that asked my W to do this… (BTW… every part of our R has been me.) What we did was to hold each others hands face to face every morning. We then told each other “we are going to make it” through this time in our marriage… and started to tell each other everyday what we loved about each other. I know you are not ready to give up on your H. I say this because doing these kinds of things will help you both to somehow reconnect….it will make you feel better to hear what he feels for you … It’s hard to listen when you’ve been hurt so very badly. If he choose love you, he will persevere.

As for you feeling the OW was “whatever”? You got your lioness knocked out of you! It’s like getting your breath knocked out… How are you going to get it back? I found it’s only you that can get it back… you will come to realize it is with your own good character, strength, happiness with you body, your own good beauty and time... you will get your lioness back.. You are a strong woman, (like so many others here)... You are better woman than the OW. She is an adulterer.. If you believe in God at all, then know Satan has taken hold of this woman. She may go to hell if she cannot repent, your H too! She is liar, cheat, controlling, and just flat out a bad person. And on the flip side… You have everything a good man wants… And your H knows it. You don’t start a good relationship knowing the one you are with, commits infidelity. Your H got lost in his own selfishness. All us men want to have sex with other women outside our marriages, tease, flirt with, newness… of course we do! It would be exciting and fun! But to love the one you’re with is not so easy, especially after so many years. I have come to realize how rare a man I am… (& you too) It takes real strong commitment, courage, and strength, WITHIN, to choose to keep a marriage commitment.. Not fall into sin.

M3.. good luck!

Iwant… I saw this Saturday and though about you.. wings of an angle..

here are a few pics from this neat place... italic]

[This message edited by trynhard at 9:03 PM, May 15th (Sunday)]


Posts: 2636 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Indiana
m334455
♀ Member
Member # 26893
Default  Posted: 11:14 AM, March 15th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Howdy!

Yep -- still set for Wednesday.

bb-- don't worry about that comment. We bipolar folk who take care of ourselves are pretty normal.

allgood -- I don't think the looks of the AP are really all that important. My WH's AP is someone he had a past with; it wasn't really about her looks compared to mine. I mean, he likes her looks, don't get me wrong, but a few of my friends have given me the "he cheated on you with HER?!" And in her case, my WH isn't better looking than her BH, so it wasn't about that for her either. My guess is that it isn't about looks in most A's.

Ok back to finishing up. Last day of work here.

oh, miracle, I also wanted to say that I really don't agree with polyamory. I still steadfastly stand by my assertion that if you *think* you're "in love" with two people at the same time you're doing something wrong and don't *really* love either of them.

Ugh. One of my favorite things OW said to me was "WH really loves you." Uh-huh. Bull. That is just an insane statement. Maybe he did once, maybe he will again someday, maybe he just really wishes he did -- but he doesn't. KWIM?


BW 38, 5 kids
Dday Dec. 2009

Posts: 4034 | Registered: Dec 2009
Allgoodnamesgone
♀ Member
Member # 26157
Default  Posted: 11:28 AM, March 15th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

M - I'm so excited for you!!! Good Luck on Wednesday (Guess it's all planned out - epidural and all )
After going to church yesterday (a rare trip for me) I really started to think about appreciating what I do have and not what I don't. I've been spending more quality time with my kids (between loads of laundry & SI) and I'm really much happier about it. Children really are little miracles - sometimes it's easy to forget that (especially if you have any kids that could be easily mistaken for demons's seed)and it sounds corny and all, but its so true.
Anyway, I really am excited and happy for you. Did I miss the post about the name? Or is it a surprise?


Me- BS
DDay- 8/26/09
Separated after failed R effort.

Posts: 2165 | Registered: Nov 2009
iwantamiracle
♀ Member
Member # 22812
Default  Posted: 12:06 PM, March 15th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

m3: wishing you so much happiness and joy to come with that baby...i will be praying for a healthy outcome for both of you...

as for the loving 2 people thing, i still believe you can, but like you said, neither is recieving 100% of that love....

i wrote this in my post the other day:

your ws should want to stay because he loves you more, and he loves you completely...when you love with 100% of your being no one else could exist for you in that way...it didn't for us....when you are 100% committed, no one else could exist for you in that way...it didn't for us...

people love more then one person all the time, usually though in "being in love" a "romatic" relationship it should be only one...but i believe that different people bring out different things in us, and this is true in romance too....but when you commit 100% what you bring out within to the other is pure and true...none of us recieved that, not a single bs recieve that true pure love, because within that love no others can exist...so just like you say they could not love the op, the same holds true for us...but they do still love, just not the same and its never that true and pure love...

look at how we love our children, friends, parents, other family....its just different....


try: thank you for my angel...the man who made my wooden angel today reminded me that i have a guardian angel too today...i actually think i have a few...

allgood:

Children really are little miracles - sometimes it's easy to forget that (especially if you have any kids that could be easily mistaken for demons's seed)and it sounds corny and all, but its so true.

i feel the same way...exactly down to the one child who can make you want to put him back...although for me that would be especially difficult since he is much bigger then i....manchild is 16 and thinks he 34


dip:

well my friend, i can only give you a lecture about vagina's from the owner's stance...can't go there with affect to wanting one and wanting one attached to a person i want freindship with as well as the vagina...
...you are so on your own on that one...

and oh my, i lecture...i thought i was merely passing on my pov...

my surgery is scheduled for wed...i will be home on thursday...dont know if i will be on the pc though...it would depend on how i feel i would assume...and i am pretty sure i will be here on friday...

(((tribe)))


i am taking my life back, one step at a time!!!!!

Posts: 5994 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: looking for my rainbow
old dipstick
♂ Member
Member # 25598
Default  Posted: 12:36 PM, March 15th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good grief. m3 having her baby Wednesday and miracle having surgery the same day! Good thoughts go out to both of you.

tryn.

It is good to hear that you had a good weekend. Thanks for posting the prayer.

miracle.

I'm on my own! O.K. Wednesday, try and be a good girl at the hospital. 16 and thinks he is 34? That is about par.

I don't know if someone can be in love with two people at the same time. I do know that someone can USE two people at the same time. No doubt about that.

Hugs to the tribe.


Her WW 60
Me BH 60
M 36 yr
D-day#1 fall of 76 OM#1 2NS
D-day#2 summer of 89 OM#2 LTA 8 yrs OM#3 Short Term A


Posts: 751 | Registered: Sep 2009
UKgirl
♀ Member
Member # 17062
Default  Posted: 3:28 PM, March 15th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Trynhard – weekend away
Had a visit to that website, it certainly looks a great place for a weekend retreat. But your dome photo looked eerily familiar:

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b8/Devonshire_Dome_4.jpg

This is just up the road from me. Believe it or not, it was built as stables! Then it was a hospital and now it’s part of a college campus (very nice too). And there is a spa (cos it’s in a spa town and it’s got spa water) run by the college. This is where I go from time to time – it’s really cheap!

http://www.derby.ac.uk/thedevonshirespa/spa/index.asp

What is it about domed buildings?

FNF, sometimes I think most BS’s live with triggers. It’s been such a traumatic event in our lives that, like being raped, losing a baby or having your house burned down, you relate to others who find themselves in the same situation. Sometimes I feel angry, but mostly sad.

Booger – I’m going to agree with the others. Your stupid H just falls into that category of following his dick. They rarely work out. It might take a couple of years, but one thing’s for sure and I’ve heard this from all wives whose H’s have left for OW. There will come a time when he stands on your doorstep or in your kitchen or at a social function when this “look” will cross his face – I fucked up and it’s too late now – and you will KNOW it when you see it. It will happen and you will feel sad but better. He will finally acknowledge what he threw away. You were enough, you are enough and you will always be enough. He was not and is not and never will be enough for himself, let alone anyone else. Hugs hon. (((((Booger)))))

Allgood:

I don't think the looks of the AP are really all that important. My WH's AP is someone he had a past with; it wasn't really about her looks compared to mine. I mean, he likes her looks, don't get me wrong, but a few of my friends have given me the "he cheated on you with HER?!" And in her case, my WH isn't better looking than her BH, so it wasn't about that for her either. My guess is that it isn't about looks in most A's.
Copy and pasted because it says exactly what I was thinking. Exactly. MOW and I have certain similarities, but being a lying cheating selfish low-life bitch isn’t one of them. And FWH is completely the opposite of BH in personality and looks. I think we can conclude it is not about us, the BS, or the AP, it is the WS. And, like Dip’s wife, the affair between H and his ex-gf was going to happen anyway. Nothing I could have done would have prevented it, only perhaps how long it went on for. Which I accept with sad resignation.
My concern is that the excitement, attention, that he had with ow - I'm not replacing.
It is a paradox. If you had it, you wouldn’t want it because it would make you feel cheap and used. Wrong. He had OW for escape to lala land. My H likened it to reading a book, something to be picked up, living the story for a while and then shutting the book and living his real life. In that respect it didn’t belong in his real life, however much she thought it was and wanted it to be.

And I have finally gone shopping with H. I did well, all things considered and we came home with 2 jackets, 2 long sleeve shirts, 4 short sleeved shirts, chinos, jeans, 212 sexy aftershave (to replace the Obsession he still insists she didn’t buy), a bow tie (to replace the one he lost), a dressing gown, a pair of shoes, a cashmere jumper, ummm. Think that’s about it. I was very hands off about it and just saying if the colour, cut or fit was wrong. When he said he didn’t know where to start or what to choose, I said he could ask the personal shopper if he/she was free, so he started to pick things up, hold them up in front of the mirror and after a few heavy sighs got into it. I think he realised if he didn’t, we were just going to leave without buying anything. Can I have a Girl Done Well badge?

Finally: m33, thinking of you and that little precious cargo. Take it easy and remember to breathe!
Miracle, Good luck with the surgery and hope everything goes as planned. Take it easy and do exactly what it says on the after care sheet. ie as little as possible!

Hope you girls have got your V-shape pillows!

Pheew! That was some catch up! Have an excellent week.

[This message edited by UKgirl at 3:30 PM, March 15th (Monday)]


D-Day: 30 July 2006 LTA: 5yrs
Me, BS, 56 y/o Him, WS, 57 y/o
MOW, pathetic ex-fiancee.
3 grown boys and one 18 y/o
I don't consider myself married anymore.
There are some words once spoken split the world in two. Before you say them and after.

Posts: 3328 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: UK
iwantamiracle
♀ Member
Member # 22812
Default  Posted: 8:05 PM, March 15th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

ukgirl:

Can I have a Girl Done Well badge?

i wish i knew how to do the picture thing...because i would give you a badge, a metal and a big hug...((((ukgirl)))

totally well done...

Take it easy and do exactly what it says on the after care sheet. ie as little as possible!

i promise i will...

dip:

try and be a good girl at the hospital

i promise this one too...


i am taking my life back, one step at a time!!!!!

Posts: 5994 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: looking for my rainbow
m334455
♀ Member
Member # 26893
Default  Posted: 9:16 PM, March 15th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

not a single bs recieve that true pure love, because within that love no others can exist

Yep -- that's kind of what I meant. It's exactly why I was so confounded. I really believed my H loved me. Oh, it's so hard to have been wrong about something so important.

I really hope your surgery goes well. I'll be thinking of you.

UK -- remember to breathe? Sadly, I'm not even remotely stoic. I'll be sure to remember to SCREAM though.

OK, almost at the end of the longest day of work ever. I probably won't check in again until next week -- and I'll let y'all know how it went.


BW 38, 5 kids
Dday Dec. 2009

Posts: 4034 | Registered: Dec 2009
trynhard
♂ Member
Member # 22698
Default  Posted: 5:40 AM, March 16th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

UK... What is it about domed buildings? Wow that is almost a look alike! That one looks beautiful too. And for Domes... They are build because they "appear" and seem "bigger"... and strong.

Good luck m3 and Iwant... St Pat's day so you both will have some luck!

Peace to all...


Posts: 2636 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Indiana
forgivenotforget
♀ Member
Member # 11053
Default  Posted: 12:50 PM, March 16th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I just wanted to jump in here and wish IWAM and M good luck for tomorrow. You both know we'll all be thinking of you and sending lots of positive vibes.
M - can't wait to hear all about the baby. They truly are gifts from above. I swear my grandbabies helped put the joy back in my life and I don't think I'd be where I am today without having their adorable little selves to cheer me up on the worst of my days.
UKG - Wow - just wow!!! I was so excited to read about your recent shopping trip. I know what a huge step that was for you and I couldn't be more happy that you were ready to take it. Good for you. Wish I could send you a "girl done well" badge and if I were more computer savvy I'd design it for you myself.


D-day - 12/23/05 LTA - 8 years.
"Love's a matter of trust and I just want to believe in us." M McBride

Posts: 1901 | Registered: Jun 2006 | From: A tunnel where I'm beginning to see the light
booger bear
♀ Member
Member # 26584
Angry  Posted: 1:00 PM, March 16th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well if you saw my thread in O/T I have GOUT !!!! GOUT I HAVE GOUT !!!!!!

GOUT !!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have not researched it yet ... but doc says stress is a big factor along with diet ...

so no more red meat for me ... school = stress

and ....

stbs f**ks a whore chooses her = stress and GOUT for me ....

what the hell !!!!!!!!!!!!


I am fiercely independent and I won’t apologize for it. I'd rather be single than settled.

Posts: 18711 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Here, but not there ...
Allgoodnamesgone
♀ Member
Member # 26157
Default  Posted: 2:21 PM, March 16th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I had a fairly constructive conversation with my husband last night. We talk all the time - but when it comes to anything serious - or God forbid about our relationship or his A - he is very close-mouthed.
I told him that it's my opinion that our R is doomed because I really don't think he is happy with our life. (Although I really do believe he wants to stay with me and the kids & doesnt want to see me move on). In response, he did a lot of talking (a lot for him at least) about how he didn't have to answer to anyone growing up (true) and it seems to me based upon what he told me that he is conflicted. I think he wants to be the good family man, but he also sees himself as being just 10 years away from when his father died & when is he going to get to do all the things he wanted to do. Other than the 1st 2 years of our marriage, we have always had little kids, which has meant little time for us to pursue our own interests - either individually or as a couple.
Not great news, but I was happy that he's confiding in me & happy to have a better understanding as to what's going on with him.
Our mc/his ic wants to meet with me next week to get my perspective.
Anyway, that's what's going on with me.


Me- BS
DDay- 8/26/09
Separated after failed R effort.

Posts: 2165 | Registered: Nov 2009
old dipstick
♂ Member
Member # 25598
Default  Posted: 3:25 PM, March 16th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

UKgirl.

You get a "Extra Special Super, Girl Done Well Badge!" Good job.

Booger.

Sorry to hear that. I hope you get well soon. Stress sucks!

Allgood.

At least he is talking and you found out a few things. He really is conflicted. It sounds like he does not want to compromise his life. You can not have a wife & kids and have total freedom to do what you want, unless you choose to ignore them. I have seen several Ms have trouble because the H wanted to have it both ways. I'm not talking about A stuff, but other interests. They wanted to pursue their hobbies during 90% of their free time while W took care of the homelife. They were pretty good dads when they were around. They also seemed quite proud themselves when they let their Ws have that 10% free time.

Hugs to the tribe.


Her WW 60
Me BH 60
M 36 yr
D-day#1 fall of 76 OM#1 2NS
D-day#2 summer of 89 OM#2 LTA 8 yrs OM#3 Short Term A


Posts: 751 | Registered: Sep 2009
iwantamiracle
♀ Member
Member # 22812
Default  Posted: 5:23 PM, March 16th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

m3:

UK -- remember to breathe? Sadly, I'm not even remotely stoic. I'll be sure to remember to SCREAM though.

this cracked me up...

seriously...get the drugs...and if you are breast feeding. think about skipping the middle of the night feeding and get all the sleep you can..because i know you know that when you get home sleep will become a precious commodity...

good luck m3..have a healthy baby..and you remember drugs can be your best freind tomorrow...stay well my friend..stay well..

thanks to everyone on my good wishes...i will take them all with me...


booger: gout as you have found out can be quite painful...and yes it sucks to have to now watch your diet..but that is good news too, because that really is all it takes most of the time to prevent flare-ups....and there is more then red meat involved if i remember correctly...shellfish too i think among the no-no's...i could be wrong its been a long time since i last saw that diet...i used to work years upon years ago for a podiatrist and i used to hand out that diet..again i am going back way too many years...

allgood:

he also sees himself as being just 10 years away from when his father died & when is he going to get to do all the things he wanted to do. Other than the 1st 2 years of our marriage, we have always had little kids, which has meant little time for us to pursue our own interests - either individually or as a couple.

i am glad he is finally being honest with you about his feelings, and i am proud of you for being able to listen without passing judgement..not easy when the man clearly has his priorities somewhat jumbled...

its odd if you think about it, he is fearing his own mortality and what he wouldn't get to do while he was alive and well...and when anyone who has had a true second chance at life again is usually not grateful for the motorcycle, the house, the sports..etc....the one thing they finally realize that matters the most in this life is the family....because that is what life is for...love...

i really hope it "gets it" eventually allgood, i can clearly see that you truly love this man with everything you've got...i hope he is fortuante enough to give himself the gift of "sight"..so that he can really see what is true and what is important...


(((tribe)))


i am taking my life back, one step at a time!!!!!

Posts: 5994 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: looking for my rainbow
booger bear
♀ Member
Member # 26584
Content  Posted: 5:36 PM, March 16th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((m3))) it is BABY DAY TOMORROW

good luck and squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee !!!!!

(((iwant))) best luck for you morrow also in your surgery ...

and there are a lot worse things I could have besides Gout ... just took me by surprise and caught me totaly off guard ... *sigh*

*(((tribe)))*


I am fiercely independent and I won’t apologize for it. I'd rather be single than settled.

Posts: 18711 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Here, but not there ...
iwantamiracle
♀ Member
Member # 22812
Default  Posted: 5:53 PM, March 16th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

booger: for your gout:


As Gout seems to be more prevalent in overweight people it is important to maintain a healthy body weight. Also extra fluid can help flush uric acid crystals out, but alcohol should be avoided. As well as prescribed medications it can be helpful to follow a low purine diet, avoiding foods that are high in purine and eating low purine foods moderately.

High Purine Foods – Avoid
Foods to Avoid
Beer, anchovies, organ meat (brains, kidney, liver, sweetbreads), game meats, gravies, yeast, meat extracts, sardines, herring, mackerel, scallops.

Medium Purine Foods – Eat in Moderation
Fresh and saltwater fish, shellfish, eel, meat, poultry, meat soups and broth, asparagus , mushrooms, cauliflower, spinach, legumes, oatmeal, bran, wheat germ, whole-grain breads and cereals, eggs.

Low Purine Foods – No Restriction
Breads and cereals (low-fiber, white flour, or refined grain types), nuts, peanut butter. Vegetables not high in purines, soups – cream style or vegetable without meat extract, coffee, tea, fruit juices, soft drinks, gelatin, sugar, low fat cheeses.

Gout Diet – Foods That May Help
Some people have found cherry juice or strawberries helpful. Some chemicals contained in dark berries may help reduce the inflammation and lower the uric acid.

Oily fish like salmon, or fatty acids in flax seed or olive oil or nuts may reduce inflammation too.

It has been suggested that using tofu (from soybeans) instead of meat could also be helpful.

Some have found relief with OPC3 antioxidant supplement.

A balanced diet for gout sufferers includes foods that are high in complex carbohydrates, low in protein and low in fat.


i am taking my life back, one step at a time!!!!!

Posts: 5994 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: looking for my rainbow
booger bear
♀ Member
Member # 26584
Content  Posted: 6:20 PM, March 16th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

THANK YOU IWANT

this helps alot and is alot better than I found online ...

weird tho I do not eat any of that crap that is high in uric acid

I had steak tacos on thur afternoon from Taco Mayo and had a taco salad on Sat night from a local mexican resturant ... the salad had ground beef in it ...

and I am about 40lbs over weight and have struggled with my weight all my life ... but have nver been more than 40-45 lbs over at any given time ...

so I do not know what gives ... send that list out to anyone who knows me and they will tell you I avoid all those foods like the plague cause they are icky ...

I also found that stress can be cause ... so I thought stress combined with the red meat I did eat in those couple days may have set it off ???

I ahve never had a problem like this before and no one in my family on either side has ever had Gout or any related symptons ...

grrrrrrrrrrrrrr ... hate mysteries like this ... have to make appt with my regular doc for follow up and what treatment she wants to do ... meds, diet or what ever ...

I am hoping just for the diet I would rather not take the meds longer than the 2wks I have to take them now ... although the pain med is very nice ...

just saying ....

thank you again iwant ... your super neat-o and I likes you lots


I am fiercely independent and I won’t apologize for it. I'd rather be single than settled.

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