Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
Find a Local Couselor
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: northeasternarea (43214)

I Can Relate     Print Topic    
User Topic: Long Term Affair... Part 18
forgivenotforget
♀ Member
Member # 11053
Default  Posted: 4:41 PM, May 23rd (Sunday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My basic security is gone even though our relationship is quite good. He knows, I think, he will never have me completely again. I don’t know whether to talk to him about how I feel or not.

UKG - First, let me send some extra hugs since I am getting the sense that your H's work schedule is bringing you down a bit and causing you to trigger somewhat. I am absolutely on the side of sitting down with your H and letting him know what your thoughts and feelings are. It seems you are trying to work through these on your own but lately, from your posts, I'm getting the feeling that it may be time to really let your H know exactly how these frequent separations are triggering you and are possibly the reason you are keeping him at a distance. Even though our H's won't ask us (typical conflict avoidance behavior) what we are thinking or feeling, I do believe they deeply sense our inner conflicts and it increases their insecurities about our R and so the cycle of each of us not wanting to be vulnerable escalates and sometimes escalates out of control, KWIM????, keeping walls up on both sides.
I totally understand why you feel the need not to appear insecure, I do this too, but I honestly think that when our fears keep us from being totally open with our S's and when we know our S's are conflict avoiders, instead of making the process easier we risk allowing the distance between us to get even greater.
There has never been a time when I have finally decided to tell my H that I am feeling ..... (fill in the blank) that he doesn't seem relieved to hear my fears and thoughts and to let me know that he was feeling so upset and confused and thinking that I was planning on leaving him.
We have to keep reminding ourselves that as conflict avoiders, no matter how much we want them to recognize our pulling back and address that directly, it just isn't going to happen unless we push for it. It's a true handicap and so we have to make the first move no matter how unfair that seems.
(Looks like I'm ramblin' now )
Many of us have witnessed our H's breaking down and sobbing and admitting their fear of losing us. They expect to lose us, they believe they deserve to lose us and they almost appear to be crippled by their fear and sometimes just seem to sit paralyzed waiting for the inevitable. They can't believe we are really willing to give the M another chance. Any silence on our part or withdraw, escalates that fear.
Talk to your H. I think the time has come, especially where the golf outings are concerned. Do you play? Perhaps you can play as couples. I know you do have a lot of time together too but the time apart seems to be wearing you down and keeping you from totally committing to the M right now. It's time for a chat.
(((UKG)))


D-day - 12/23/05 LTA - 8 years.
"Love's a matter of trust and I just want to believe in us." M McBride

Posts: 1901 | Registered: Jun 2006 | From: A tunnel where I'm beginning to see the light
forgivenotforget
♀ Member
Member # 11053
Default  Posted: 4:59 PM, May 23rd (Sunday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well they offered me the position

LH 2 - Well of course they did!!! Congratulations - I am so happy for you.
Do you plan to take a little time off between jobs or are you going to dive right in??
Hopefully, you can take a week or two just to give yourself a mini vacation before starting your new position. Keep us posted.
Also, you know I'll be thinking of you and sending you hugs and offers of support with the upcoming month. You have gotten so strong and even though I know it will be a tough time for you, I am confident your strength will get you through. If there's anything we can do to make it easier, just let us know how we can help. (((LH)))
Honest - I read your posts and it sounds like you did an amazing job while your H was here. Congratulations to you too. I'm glad you will now have more time while he is gone to build up additional strength for the future. I think it will be interesting to see how this time away will be different for both of you. I am betting that your H is leaving a lot less secure in his power over you than when he first arrived back home. This is a good thing. I am also betting that you are feeling a lot more confident and determined to get the life you deserve and are entitled to. (((Honest)))


D-day - 12/23/05 LTA - 8 years.
"Love's a matter of trust and I just want to believe in us." M McBride

Posts: 1901 | Registered: Jun 2006 | From: A tunnel where I'm beginning to see the light
trynhard
♂ Member
Member # 22698
Default  Posted: 7:54 AM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Atsenaotie…
it is hard to know that someone who has worked as hard as you is still struggling.
It will be you ats too.. and all of us, if you choose to stay and R. After something like this has happened, it is not easy.. You fight these negative thoughts, the images, and learn that this is now you. It is in your head. Maybe like if you had a birth mark on your face, you hate it, you look at it everyday, but it is part of your body and not a damn thing you can do about it. Yes, I think about leaving my W and dream of a different life without my W… It is part of my grieving I guess… But I still choose to stay and fight. It is nobodies decision buy my own.

But this too… I had a great weekend… Nice dinner and evening with my W, Ran in half Marathon.. 1:59:23, a couple movies, perfect day to plant flowers, Son came in for cookout, Sunday boating…. Some lady asked me this weekend if I had turned 40 yet! I laughed and said I just got my AARP invitation to join this week.. lol… It was all good. I am living life again.

Anyway, I hope all is well… Peace to all.

[This message edited by trynhard at 7:55 AM, May 24th (Monday)]


Posts: 2636 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Indiana
m334455
♀ Member
Member # 26893
Default  Posted: 8:23 AM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Someone on another forum said they think women stay in love until they find a new love. What do you think about that?

I think it's bullhockey. I fell out of love with my XH years before I fell in love with my WH.

Miracle -- the kids are 8, 3, 1 and 2 mos. What do you think?

I cried all the way to work this morning -- but on the plus side I rode my bike and got in nearly an hour of exercise.

Actually, I think I'm in false R. Remember I kept saying something just wasn't right? Well, while I was doing the budget I noticed that there was a charge for parking at a local hotel on a night he was supposed to be at a basketball game and then he and I spent the next day together and he was really subdued and also bought me jewelry.

so -- there you go.


BW 38, 5 kids
Dday Dec. 2009

Posts: 4034 | Registered: Dec 2009
Allgoodnamesgone
♀ Member
Member # 26157
Default  Posted: 9:19 AM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

M3:
I noticed that there was a charge for parking at a local hotel on a night he was supposed to be at a basketball game

This sends chills down my spine.

Would there be any legitimate reason for the hotel parking? I'm not trying to be a smart ass, but I know here I've used hotel parking lots just because they are close to what I need to get to.

Find your strength - you know it's there. Be prepared for the worst, but don't assume the worst.

You are in my thoughts. I really don't know what else to say.


Me- BS
DDay- 8/26/09
Separated after failed R effort.

Posts: 2165 | Registered: Nov 2009
iwantamiracle
♀ Member
Member # 22812
Default  Posted: 10:09 AM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

m3: i agree with allgood...first see it there is a legitimate reason...

if not, then you need to decide what it is you want to do....

your childrens ages are really good....it means you have some time before puberty is reached to make your decision....meaning that the aftermath with the kids will be minimal as long as you handle it well in front of them...

i really think you need to line up your ducks in more ways then one....you need to play every possible scenario out in your head or on paper....list all your options...and one by one eliminate the options that would be filled with regret....and once you confront your husband you will at least have some sort of plan in place of what you want to do...or if the confrontation already took place then now lay out all your options along with the conseqences of each...and then take the one of the least regrets...and if you are still not sure...take your time to decide....there is no rush....

and m3 i am so so sorry, my heart aches for you right now....

we are here for ya..

(((((m3)))))


tryn:

Maybe like if you had a birth mark on your face, you hate it, you look at it everyday, but it is part of your body and not a damn thing you can do about it.

i love this analogy...and lets take it one step further....there is something you can do about it, you can cut it out, but instead have learned to accept it and see past it...so that everytime you look at it its just a fleeting glance....and unless it changes form its just there in the background....not intrusive, just there...

fnf:


(Looks like I'm ramblin' now )

i love this, why....because its nice to know i am not the only one.. ....and most of us seem to get afflicted with this at one time or another...and some of us. ...more then others...

yesterday ended on a very positive note...my dd17 had some freinds over, they came somewhere in the 3ish area...3girls and 3 boys....part of the senior prom group...well the laughter that was heard was joyful to my soul....it ended up that the girls had to go home, the boys stayed for dinner and after dinner these boys played board games with my other kids, pfm and myself....it was great, i love having a houseful of kids, i also love it that these kids liked being with the rest of us, and i loved loved loved that my dd was not only ok with it but genuinely enjoyed it too...afterwards when i said good nite to her, i gave her a big hug and told her how nice these kids were and how good it was to have a house full, and she looked at me with this huge beautiful smile and said she knows how much i like having a houseful and she does too....very cool....its times like this that keep me motivated when all i want to do is run...

i am still having an awful time with this computer...the fonts are driving me crazy and all the functions are different....so if or i should say when i screw up my postings, you'all know why....

((((tribe)))


i am taking my life back, one step at a time!!!!!

Posts: 5994 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: looking for my rainbow
old dipstick
♂ Member
Member # 25598
Default  Posted: 11:24 AM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Allgood. If you grill a pizza, be careful about the crust. It is easy to burn.

nofun, honest, miracle. Talking to strangers? Isn't there some kind of warning/rule about that? Didn't you girls get that memo? I may have to ground you three, or take away your cellphones. Four hours of talking, talking. How did this strange man even get a word in? Anyway it sounds like he was full of shit.

m3. I hate to hear that about the hotel parking. Hopefully there is a good reason for this. Thinking of you.

Hugs to the Tribe.


Her WW 60
Me BH 60
M 36 yr
D-day#1 fall of 76 OM#1 2NS
D-day#2 summer of 89 OM#2 LTA 8 yrs OM#3 Short Term A


Posts: 751 | Registered: Sep 2009
trynhard
♂ Member
Member # 22698
Default  Posted: 11:25 AM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

M3... Yes, I would secretly follow this up. ALWAYS follow your gut! God sends you these messages… I think it can be simple enough… Was the basketball arena close to that hotel parking lot? I park in the Hilton lot for Colt’s football games. Then, take your time and think about your next move before you say anything to your H… Once you know, your mind can be placed at rest.

Of course you can fall out of love with someone at any time. I don’t think that person that made that post understands love. Remember, you can have loving “feelings” like lust.. and miss that and maybe long for or yearn for the sex, the past… So many mistake this feeling for love… It really is not love. Once you stop giving or receiving love gifts, physical touch, quality time, affirming each other… You are no longer in love.. In fact, I still say you can have two lovers at the same time. It is a sick, unhealthy, incomplete love for the person in love with two people…

Iwant… I do think one day I will get to the point where I can just look at it and think only as it in as a bad point in my life… without dwelling. I also expect it to take me another 1 or 2 years to fully recover... If my wife does not cross over again... I can remember folks telling me that it takes 3 years and I would think to myself, I’ll never make it… today, I think I can make it. I just hope my W can stay inside my boundaries and we can stay happy together. If not, then I guess it was meant to be.


Allgoodnamesgone… I got a chuckle… “But anyway - I can't do it!” Of course you can… It’s never perfect but is does work and makes both understand what the other is thinking, wanting and desiring for there own happiness without so much threatening…

[This message edited by trynhard at 11:26 AM, May 24th (Monday)]


Posts: 2636 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Indiana
m334455
♀ Member
Member # 26893
Default  Posted: 11:55 AM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Would there be any legitimate reason for the hotel parking?

Not at that hotel. It's not in the same town as the game. I also don't think its a public lot; you've got to be staying there to park there. And its in a part of town where he could use public transportation to go to the game, but the transportation near our house is closer, and if you were going to park in that part of town and go from there you'd park elsewhere, at least he would. The friends he was going with don't live near us. it's not near his work either. (not) surprisingly enough though, it's about 3 blocks from the hotel he was charging for them before, though it's MUCH fancier (nice) and his group has an extra ticket to the games.

I am honestly thinking about calling her BH. Maybe he and I should just sit the two of them down and hash it all out. This is just STUPID. If they want to be together then they should just be together. Her kids are 9, 8 and 5 -- they could also adjust to a divorce just fine too. Jeesh. I can't decide if I should talk to my H first or just call her BH. My instinct says talk to H and if I get a weird vibe from him then call her BH. I cannot think of any possible reason for him to have been there, but if by some (slim?) chance he's still NC with her, then I don't want to stir the pot.

There is another charge for parking at the same place a week later.


BW 38, 5 kids
Dday Dec. 2009

Posts: 4034 | Registered: Dec 2009
m334455
♀ Member
Member # 26893
Default  Posted: 11:57 AM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My other thought was to get a keylogger...and wait to see what I see.

And then my OTHER thought is just to tell him -- WTF? I do not want to be the WH police just nut up and be a decent human being for a change ...

ETA --
Of course, if this is true then it's over. You can't give someone an ultimatium and not follow through. Well, you could, but I don't want to. It's her or me and he's darn lucky me is even an option but if he's still not 100% with me then as far as I'm concerned he's with her. Finis.

[This message edited by m334455 at 12:00 PM, May 24th (Monday)]


BW 38, 5 kids
Dday Dec. 2009

Posts: 4034 | Registered: Dec 2009
iwantamiracle
♀ Member
Member # 22812
Default  Posted: 12:12 PM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

i don't think you should contact her husband just yet...i think you should make an appt for a polygraph, then confront and listen to what he has to say....if he comes up with a reason that does not involve cheating, tell him about the scheduled polygraph...and then if you want to you could also call the bh right there and then to compare notes....

oh m3 i am so so sorry......this so sucks...even if it turns out to be nothing, which i admit is a longshot, to have to deal with this is just crappy beyond the crapper....


(((m3)))

eta: at this point in time if he IS cheating then yes i would think ending it is the only way to go, ultimatum or not..marriage is only to contain 2 people...add in another and you forfeit the marriage...

[This message edited by iwantamiracle at 12:13 PM, May 24th (Monday)]


i am taking my life back, one step at a time!!!!!

Posts: 5994 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: looking for my rainbow
LookingforLove
♀ Member
Member # 12002
Default  Posted: 12:31 PM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It has been so long since I have posted on this forum but have finally realized that this is where I belong...I know my post will be long so please forgive me but I need to give history so that I can get some of the wise advise that I know everyone has...

Married 21 years--together 23
2 boys (20 & 10)
H Started affair with MOW co-worker in 2000 when I was pregnant with 2nd son. I found out when son was 4 months old and he threw her under the bus...

Fast forward to 2006--H starts up with same OW who is now divorced (she's had multiple affairs with men at work). This affair has gone off and on for 4 years now..
I have had multiple D-Days and false recoveries....

This past Friday I told H, I was meeting some girlfriends after work. He said fine. According to my oldest son my H left at 8am. youngest son starts calling me at 6 pm--his dad has not been home and will not answer cell phone.
I go home immediately..boys are upset.
For the last month my oldest has seen my H leave in the am and not return until right before youngest comes home from school..My oldest knows about affair but not with who.
My youngest does not know about affair but only that mom and dad fight and argue alot...
My oldest asked me what I was going to do...I told him that I should kick his DAD out...we can not keep going on like this...

I go to the store. On my way back H calls me from the house...he will leave as soon as I get there.
Apparently my youngest overheard me telling my oldest that I wanted to kick him out...and he tells his dad that as soon as H gets home.
I get home and H has bag packed and youngest is crying and screaming. I start yelling at H about where's he's been and that I hate him for what he's done. He leaves...me and my boys are a wreck....

Saturday H calls at 10:40am saying he wants to talk to the boys, he will be there in an hour. youngest calls him at noon and he says he is eating, he will be there soon. He arrives at 1:15pm. Of course I believe he was with OW all night and then having lunch with her...
He comes, I ask for garage door opener and house key as he has left. He refuses to give them to me and I said okay, I will get locks changed. He drives off with boys to talk to them...
He comes back an hour later and comes in the house. Telling me that I will not control him over the keys. He has to make arrangements to get his stuff out, quit his job, cash out his 401K and go to Florida where he is from.
I tell him that I can not afford the house and bills by myself but he has chosen to leave. and he has left me with the boys.
We agree to fix up the house which we need to do, sell it and go our separate ways....

sunday--he tells me that he is going to the gym. He leaves at 9am and doesn't come home til 3 PM. I know that he was with OW as I found out that her daughters were with their father this weekend...my gut tells me that H planned this whole thing but I never thought he would be so callous as to pack and leave in front of his boys...but then this is not the man I married

Please help. I don't know what to do or how to act around him anymore. I don't know this man. I never thought he was capable of hurting our kids....
I think it's too late to 180 as he is so emotionally invested in OW that I think he really believes he loves her....

[This message edited by LookingforLove at 12:32 PM, May 24th (Monday)]


Me: BS
Him: WS LTA 6+ yrs
OW: Skank Company HO
Status:
Divorce filed 4-5-11
WH served on 4-6-11 with D papers and NC order.
Divorced: 4/20/12

Posts: 1114 | Registered: Sep 2006 | From: Washington State
old dipstick
♂ Member
Member # 25598
Default  Posted: 12:34 PM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

m3. If you confront your H, do you think you would get the truth? He has proven that he is a liar. The same with the OW. Are you sure that if he is involved with someone, that it is the same OW? I understand why you do not want to spend your time being the WH police. You have a full plate already. However, the real truth would be in his contacts with OW. People lie, facts do not. You are a lawyer, I don't know why I am telling you that, but I am saying it anyway. If you have indeed caught him at something, it is because he got careless and made a mistake. I would try and investigate more. Wait for him to make another mistake. You are smart and logical. Think it over. I'm sure you will do what is best for you.

Hugs to the tribe.


Her WW 60
Me BH 60
M 36 yr
D-day#1 fall of 76 OM#1 2NS
D-day#2 summer of 89 OM#2 LTA 8 yrs OM#3 Short Term A


Posts: 751 | Registered: Sep 2009
iwantamiracle
♀ Member
Member # 22812
Default  Posted: 12:58 PM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

lookingforlove:

i am so so sorry for your pain....

...my gut tells me that H planned this whole thing but I never thought he would be so callous as to pack and leave in front of his boys...but then this is not the man I married

Please help. I don't know what to do or how to act around him anymore. I don't know this man. I never thought he was capable of hurting our kids....
I think it's too late to 180 as he is so emotionally invested in OW that I think he really believes he loves her....

no this is not the man you thougth you married...and it would seem that that man no longer exists and for your emotional well being as that of your sons i believe you need to accept that....he is not the man you thought he was and he has chosen to move on...he has made the choice for you....now what you do from here on out is your choice....

so now you need to figure out every option you have and what consequence goes with every option...like where to live....do you need to work.....so forth and so on...

do you have any kind of a support system, friends and/or family?...are you in ic?...if no to either, then is there anyone irl that you can reach out to, and i gather you will be financially strapped by this, so ic will have to be creative...are you covered by insurance or what about your local church....and you also have si....and as you know there are so many of us here and forums for pretty much every and any stage...and its here 24/7......

first things first...line up whatever ducks you have left and weigh all of your options so that you know what choices there are available to you...remember he has already made his choice and now its time for you to make your own choices for you and your boys from here on out...

and i would change those locks yesterday and let him know that he needs to make prior arrangements with you to get his stuff....and then i would make sure you have a brother or a sheriff with him to make sure he gets only "his" stuff....the stuff the belongs to both of you should be forfeited by him....

protect yourself..


(((((lookingforlove)))))


i am taking my life back, one step at a time!!!!!

Posts: 5994 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: looking for my rainbow
iwantamiracle
♀ Member
Member # 22812
Default  Posted: 1:04 PM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

dip:

Anyway it sounds like he was full of shit.

yes i agree, i actually had disagreed with him on points right then and there and was already for battle....and then i realized that this man was still in complete pain from his own experience...he struck nerves too within both honest and fun....the two of them had there moments that i was sorry i left the box of puffs in the car....so anyhoo as allgood would say, i backed off when i realized that it not only would do no good, because there was no getting through to this man, but instead began to listen to his story with an open heart as we all did...

still disagree with most of his perceptions though.....the one i agreed with the most was the one about how intelligent we all are...

time to go get my kids...bbl

(((tribe)))


i am taking my life back, one step at a time!!!!!

Posts: 5994 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: looking for my rainbow
LookingforLove
♀ Member
Member # 12002
Default  Posted: 1:11 PM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Iwantamiracle--
Thanks for your input. When we talked on Saturday we agreed that we both could not afford the house/bills ect on our own. And we did not want to lose the equity in the home by walking away..So we decided to stay in the house to fix it up, sell it and then go our separate ways.
I did see an attorney a while back who told me that if either one of us moves, we are still liable for the bills and we could lose the house if one of us doesn't pay. I believe that my H would stop paying the mortgage if he is not living there. Since we are both working and both make the same money--I would not be able to get support but will get child support for the youngest. That is still not enough to pay for everything by myself...
Believe me, If I could have him out tomorrow and be able to support me and my boys, I would.
I just don't know how else to handle the situation with him and OW while trying to get this house together to sell in the next 6 mos....


Me: BS
Him: WS LTA 6+ yrs
OW: Skank Company HO
Status:
Divorce filed 4-5-11
WH served on 4-6-11 with D papers and NC order.
Divorced: 4/20/12

Posts: 1114 | Registered: Sep 2006 | From: Washington State
Allgoodnamesgone
♀ Member
Member # 26157
Default  Posted: 2:03 PM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

M3:
I say screw it! If you cant think of any legitimate reason for him being at the parking lot -on that day or any other (you know how sometimes the charges are off by a day from the date of the actual charge) then why should you have to live with this uncertainty a minute longer?
What more evidence do you need? I say none. My feeling is that he will not be able to explain the charge & will then confess.
And - if he's being transparent then he should've known to tell you that there's going to be a charge for a hotel parking - don't want to alarm you, etc.
(Even my h is getting the hang of that - told me last week his friend borrowed his credit card - just wanted to let me know).
As far as what you want to do - do what you want. I've promised myself that the next time I'm faced with one of these kind of situations I'm not going to react immediately - or make any conclusions right away - cuz I've said "that's it - it's over" too many times already.

Dang - if this is false R - I'm making a road trip - cuz he definitely deserves a beat down. (JK mods).

[This message edited by Allgoodnamesgone at 2:04 PM, May 24th (Monday)]


Me- BS
DDay- 8/26/09
Separated after failed R effort.

Posts: 2165 | Registered: Nov 2009
old dipstick
♂ Member
Member # 25598
Default  Posted: 2:48 PM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

miracle. I meant to say that he was full of shit, except for the part about how he thought you all were intelligent. I guess I was too wrapped up in admonishing you about talking to strangers that I forgot to include that point.


Her WW 60
Me BH 60
M 36 yr
D-day#1 fall of 76 OM#1 2NS
D-day#2 summer of 89 OM#2 LTA 8 yrs OM#3 Short Term A


Posts: 751 | Registered: Sep 2009
LookingforLove
♀ Member
Member # 12002
Default  Posted: 3:09 PM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I posted a little while ago and iwantamiracle answered me. But I wondered if anyone else had any other suggestions/opinions.
Thanks


Me: BS
Him: WS LTA 6+ yrs
OW: Skank Company HO
Status:
Divorce filed 4-5-11
WH served on 4-6-11 with D papers and NC order.
Divorced: 4/20/12

Posts: 1114 | Registered: Sep 2006 | From: Washington State
m334455
♀ Member
Member # 26893
Default  Posted: 3:09 PM, May 24th (Monday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh, bless you all so much. I didn't even mention it to my IC last week. I'm just so tired and disgusted. Or, as my three year old would say, Jiss-gusted.

Seems like it's damned if you do, damned if you don't. You feel like you didn't try enough for your kids to save their 2 parent home if you don't try to R and you feel like you wasted everyones time if R doesn't work. Ugh.

Dip, you're right -- facts don't lie. That's what I keep coming back to.


BW 38, 5 kids
Dday Dec. 2009

Posts: 4034 | Registered: Dec 2009
Topic Posts: 1000
Pages: 1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12 · 13 · 14 · 15 · 16 · 17 · 18 · 19 · 20 · 21 · 22 · 23 · 24 · 25 · 26 · 27 · 28 · 29 · 30 · 31 · 32 · 33 · 34 · 35 · 36 · 37 · 38 · 39 · 40 · 41 · 42 · 43 · 44 · 45 · 46 · 47 · 48 · 49 · 50

Return to Forum: I Can Relate This Topic is Full
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.