SurvivingInfidelity.com® > Just Found Out
Great Posts for Newbies to Read
Many thanks from the bottom of my heart! This is now on my "favorites" tab.
This post was amazing, I wish I read this earlier (I'm day 7 after D-Day). Could the mods sticky this thread, as well as the others that were bumped yesterday? This would be a big help for us who just found out about the A and are looking for help.
WOW! What a plethora of information!! SO many good things to consider-I am amazed at just how 'cookie-cutter' the wayward are! It is almost word for word and deed for deed on eveybody-My boyfriend has followed the same tracks as most of the people here! the gaslighting, the lying, the blaming, the hysterical bonding! Everything!!
My WW and I went to our first MC session on Thursday, and the last couple of days have been rough. I read through this thread again (I've done it a couple of times before), and there is just so much great information here. I really felt like I got "centered" again after reading this. Thanks again for compiling this thread.
One of the posts that really helped while being down in the dumps is this one. Did SerJR write it? It's a thing of beauty and inspiration, just what I needed yesterday.
You know... I felt an awful lot like a failure... I mean the hero's supposed to win the battle in the end, isn't he?
What they don't tell you is that heroes often do fail.
Did my marriage fail? Yes. Am I proud of that? No. I was awfully proud of what I had... and all of that was stripped away.
And that lead to shame... the surest measure of goals never attained.
But that shame... lead to humility. By stripping myself of all conceits I exposed the roots by which the virtues of truth, love, and courage could flourish.
I was cast into a pit of hell and the devil laughed his ass off...
And I grabbed that fucker by the horns and told him to sit down, shut the fuck up, and enjoy the show.
Heroes may fail in the task, but they never fail in themselves. The real battle was never for my marriage... it was for me all along. If I was to truly fail... it would have been my doing. No way was that gonna happen.
Character isn't defined by what's happened to a person. It's defined by the choices a person makes.
So go ahead and throw me a label... cast me off into that pit. But I've gone over the edge and come back again. Go ahead and label me... the only ones that matter anyway are the ones I ascribe to myself... and I refuse to limit my potential. And besides... that label might come in handy to wipe my mouth after I eat the devil's lunch on him.
[This message edited by hurts_alot at 6:08 PM, March 13th (Sunday)]
ole ole bump