Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
Find a Local Couselor
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: SoCalBoy (43217)

I Can Relate     Print Topic    
User Topic: Betrayed Men-Part 6 (Men only)
HurtingandLost
♂ Member
Member # 29322
Default  Posted: 9:07 PM, November 26th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My first wife was equally as much of a whore as I was back then...she just lived her life in denial, and it wasnt until much later in the marriage that all of the truths becan to come to light...

My current wife cracks me up. She has always claimed, and to her mistake, still only claims being with 4 men including me (she cant fucking count unless OM was there first?)...Anyways, I've been around more pussy in my life than I care to remember (and thanks to heavy doses of alcohol in my younger days, I dont!)...

Long story short no woman learns to give a bj like she does by osmosis; nor does someone come up with some of the kinky shit she has by being so "innocent"...I've always laughed at her steadfast claim, especially after the A and she forgot to add him to the list....


holding out hope
UPDATE: Hope's Dead

Posts: 430 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: CO
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 9:18 PM, November 26th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Fortunately, nothing was in my mouth at the time I read this

no woman learns to give a bj like she does by osmosis

New rule: Put drinks and food down when reading on here.


Posts: 6021 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
HurtingandLost
♂ Member
Member # 29322
Default  Posted: 9:25 PM, November 26th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sorry for being so direct!

Funny thing how the WW having an affair changes my perspective on things....6 months ago I wouldnt be caught dead making any statements about my marital activities...

These days I just cant seem to give a fuck....something called respect is gone..

[This message edited by HurtingandLost at 9:27 PM, November 26th (Friday)]


holding out hope
UPDATE: Hope's Dead

Posts: 430 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: CO
HurtingandLost
♂ Member
Member # 29322
Default  Posted: 9:43 PM, November 26th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Analysis:

I joined August 15th, a month after Dday. In the 103 days since, this site has seen a growth of 906 new members.

That boils down to 8.8 affairs per day. Given that a vast majority of them get swept under the rug, what does that say about society today? And the fact that this is only one of many different mediums people utilize to communicate and cope...

EDIT: Another new member...

[This message edited by HurtingandLost at 9:45 PM, November 26th (Friday)]


holding out hope
UPDATE: Hope's Dead

Posts: 430 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: CO
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 9:53 PM, November 26th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

We're going to be ok, this is one of the few chuck norris-type fist-bump places I could be.
Am not sure at this point I even like wimmenz!

I was getting it once every 3 months if I begged for it.
I was going to make sure subconsciously that I wasn't going to get rejected sexually ever again.

Wise lady.
!That just made me feel like the 2nd bird- and it was a good thing!
Wal, thanks
Thanks for your posts here man.
the rejection dynamic of my first marriage – a new concept for me since I’m
not the sharpest knife
who knew?
Excellent posts sirs!
Thank God for you guys and SI!

Anyway, my ohso genius answer was to marry a nympho and go
Nya nya nya for the rest of my life.
It was….
Well hell
The reason I’m even here I spose, tapping this out for starters.

see? we aint never had ever any threadjerkin, just proved it.


Posts: 6021 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
HurtingandLost
♂ Member
Member # 29322
Default  Posted: 9:58 PM, November 26th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

In between xww and ww, I dated a nympho for a couple of months. It was VERY therapuedic

But, alas, she wore my ass out, and it turns out 10 times a day average over a prolonged period of time will beat you down.

So, I cut her loose and started looking for a normal gal....how in the hell did I end up with WW instead?


holding out hope
UPDATE: Hope's Dead

Posts: 430 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: CO
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 10:01 PM, November 26th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sounds like it's down to farmanimals don't it?

Posts: 6021 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
HurtingandLost
♂ Member
Member # 29322
Default  Posted: 10:02 PM, November 26th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Maybe that explains all the scratching going on???


holding out hope
UPDATE: Hope's Dead

Posts: 430 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: CO
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 10:20 PM, November 26th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

some dynamic somethin or other, no doubt! It's ok if I envy you getting rid of the nympho early here too.
All kinds a new rules on here guys! Dang! Y'all are chatty!

Posts: 6021 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 10:21 PM, November 26th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

LOL dam, I KNEW that would come around and bite my ass!

Posts: 6021 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
wincing_at_light
♂ Member
Member # 14393
Default  Posted: 10:24 PM, November 26th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

FYI, that wise lady was LadyV.

In case some of the more recent dudes haven't noticed, you should be paying attention whenever LadyV posts. She's always got insights that will blow your mind if you pay attention.


Machiavellian idiot savant

Posts: 6690 | Registered: Apr 2007 | From: Indiana
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 10:43 PM, November 26th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I know I might sometimes sound crazy. here, I don't really care, so it always opens me, grows me, because I have really found safe here. Poster was right! Saying that we're posting to ourselves.

You can't define the universe, only your own domain of interactions with the universe.
Gene Youngblood

to him, and the crazy ephemeral beauty
(o these words will fade!)
I dedicate this:
came with a title.
Called holdmytongue.

So how is that avoiding answers work’n out for ya
hm?
can’t say,
exactly.
Why?
If I ever find that Cartesian guy I’ll ask him.
I’d guess he’d reply:
Why I?
He’d start at a starting point at least and describe
An outside observable thing,
Then himself inside.
2 discretely essential points-to see..
shut your ear!

Now, he’d make a 180, it’s really that simple
from there to me is 3,

now he constructs a triangle for me!
and an attendant 90-degree, turning his head
that then pull-pushes as well, tension and compression.

He’d describe it. Real well.
It wouldn’t be long before he described what’s above,
and a tetrahedron’s 3 dimensions, o he’d explain it
real well.

.You, in contrast,
hide yourself.

Not so well…

( as it turns out... or “too well” as it turned out, agh! No haz real ending to that one.
That’s ok too. Just another process in some failed fuckin poem saga)

Who cares? If I cared to drop some kinda nice somewhere?
Didn't cost me one dam bit.


Posts: 6021 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 10:49 PM, November 26th (Friday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well that figures, ladyv...Can you imagine? When I first got here and read her for awhile, I asked her to marry me!
Not.
Sharpest.

Thank god it disappeared from the threads!
Ya gotta just LOVE ephemeri city here!


Posts: 6021 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
StillGoing
♂ Member
Member # 28571
Default  Posted: 8:36 AM, November 27th (Saturday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I keep thinking I'm going to do a BH poll on this topic. It seems that lots of the BH's on SI have this story (i.e., wives with significantly more sexual partners before -- well, and during, too, I guress -- the marriage.)

Sure seems that way. I have not had sex with anyone but FWW. We met at 16, we're 34 now. She's had 2 other partners during our relationship, I haven't ever done more than kiss another gal, before we ever met.

I don't think I ever really viewed sex as anything more than that. I do attach the ideas of intimacy and vulnerability there but there's always been times when it's just fucktime funtime.

I dunno why it is not special enough to be more than sex but important enough to ruin my goddamn life because she gave it away to some asshole that couldn't keep a job shaking paint cans or something. Think it has more to do with the deception and abuse than that, though I admit the difference between the EA and PA to me was huge.


“Fate is a fickle bitch who dotes on irony.”

Posts: 7116 | Registered: May 2010 | From: USA
bluewater
♂ Member
Member # 9297
Default  Posted: 10:14 AM, November 27th (Saturday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am not sure if this is an appropriate question or not so my apologies in advance if it is not. But I have often wondered about this and in light of the discussion of the last few days about sex being just sex for so many BS after the betrayal was uncovered i thought I might ask about it.

I was wondering if any BS have a WW/FWW who they just use for sex? And does your WW/FWW know that this is all it is? Just sex. Or does does your WW/FWW consider it to be more?


Posts: 485 | Registered: Jan 2006
Mr. Kite
♂ Member
Member # 28840
Default  Posted: 10:22 AM, November 27th (Saturday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I dunno why it is not special enough to be more than sex but important enough to ruin my goddamn life because she gave it away to some asshole that couldn't keep a job shaking paint cans or something. Think it has more to do with the deception and abuse than that, though I admit the difference between the EA and PA to me was huge.

Had sex with tons of women before being married to WW. Nothing to brag about but with 2 ex-wives, being a musician playing in clubs, and the looseness of the times(60's through the 70's), it was part of the lifestyle. In my circle of friends and acquaintances anyway. The same long list of sexual escapades with WW. Didn't care what she did before she met me. Not my business.

However, when we exchanged vows before family, friends, and God, and I kept mine but she didn't keep hers; trust was lost forever. If I can't trust another human being to keep their word to me, then there is no basis for an intimate relationship. And therein lies the problem.

All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty (my trust in WW) back together again. Every time she speaks there's a little voice in my head that asks, "Is this true or a lie?" And yet she's constantly offended that I doubt her word. Go figure.

bluewater: my answer to your question would be "no."

[This message edited by Mr. Kite at 10:25 AM, November 27th (Saturday)]


Posts: 900 | Registered: Jun 2010 | From: Mid-Atlantic
Jimi40
♂ Member
Member # 10909
Default  Posted: 11:41 AM, November 27th (Saturday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bluewater, I'm gonna say no.

I have had a trollip or two in my time, though.


You've got nowhere to fall, when your back's to the wall.

Posts: 5524 | Registered: Jun 2006 | From: Niagara
64fleet
♂ Member
Member # 18710
Default  Posted: 12:24 PM, November 27th (Saturday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

nahhh, bluewwater-I also need her health ins & her help to raise the kids. Sex just keeps her in the house.


time wounds all heels

Posts: 5359 | Registered: Mar 2008 | From: deliverance land
atsenaotie
♂ Member
Member # 27650
Default  Posted: 4:48 PM, November 27th (Saturday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sometimes, I think it might be better to buy a new car than to keep trying to fix and deal with the issues of an old one. Not to mention enjoying all that test driving and that new car smell.

anyone interested in a high milage '53 blonde? (multiple owners)

I guess I am just tired of her crap today. It takes a special person to ruin a beatiful day on the water. sigh, if only I was a better man

[This message edited by atsenaotie at 8:34 PM, November 27th (Saturday)]


LTA BS 53
FWW 60
M 1990, dday 10-5-09
Reconciled

Posts: 3967 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: FL
mkgit
♂ New Member
Member # 30208
Question  Posted: 6:22 PM, November 27th (Saturday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

NEED ADVICE


while together overseas i caught my wife at 3:00am on her BB (DDay 04 Jan 2010 eve of our 9year anniversary and my wife was 7 months pregnant with our 3rd child). I discovered her emailing with a co-worker. She became very defensive and kept stating "I'm not doing anything wrong", etc. i took the BB away from her and read the emails which went back 4-5 months and progressively got more intimate with the standard "soap-opera" language of "Soul-mate" "thinking about you all the time." worse still, she was sharing details of our intimate times with the OW. OW is married with 3 young children and a wife who suffers from Lou Gehrig's disease. I had actually shook hands with him once or twice. that night i emailed him. he replied stating he was sorry but he was never a risk to my WW and i and had no intention of threatening our past, present or future,etc. both my wife and OW stated there had never been any PA and over the past 11 months i haven't been able to prove any PA existed. a NC is in effect and my wife states since then there has been no contact whatsoever. we've been in IC and MC for the past 8months but it doesn't seem to be working, at least not for me. I haven't been intimate, sexually, with my wife in months and occasionally i blow up and say some really nasty things to her. tonight she said she'd "had enough" and that it wasn't working. that we should talk to lawyers on Monday. I can't say that I really like being around her much but I have three beautiful children (8,7 and 5months) that mean the world to me and the thought of them suffering just breaks my heart. in addition, my wife is a practicing attorney and i'm very worried on how to protect myself and my children. I really need advice on the next steps.

thank you

Me: 43
WW: 38
DDay: 04 Jan 2010 (night of the anniversary)



Posts: 31 | Registered: Nov 2010
Topic Posts: 1000
Pages: 1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12 · 13 · 14 · 15 · 16 · 17 · 18 · 19 · 20 · 21 · 22 · 23 · 24 · 25 · 26 · 27 · 28 · 29 · 30 · 31 · 32 · 33 · 34 · 35 · 36 · 37 · 38 · 39 · 40 · 41 · 42 · 43 · 44 · 45 · 46 · 47 · 48 · 49 · 50

Return to Forum: I Can Relate This Topic is Full
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.