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Newest Member: DevastatedWH (43169)

I Can Relate     Print Topic    
User Topic: BS Questions for WS- Part 5
cantbelieve
♀ Member
Member # 22028
Default  Posted: 9:24 AM, January 21st (Friday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you BastersBFF. When I saw my dad cry for the first time, it brought me to my knees, but it made me love him so much. When I see a may cry or tear up, I see this tough guy that is human and so full of compassion. My H has so much compassion, but I think if I saw him cry, I would melt and would want to wrap my arms around him. I would feel so much love and I guess, feel like he needed me for something.


Me: BS (57)
Him: WS (58)
LTA 4 years with co-worker
DS(26)
DD(23)
DD(19)
Married 28 years
D-day1 5/08
D-day2 11/08
Status: 6 yrs and wondering if I'll ever be truly happy again

Posts: 1044 | Registered: Dec 2008 | From: DFW
icbtih8
♀ Member
Member # 23797
Default  Posted: 4:04 PM, January 26th (Wednesday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't know why I'm asking this other than perhaps there is this tiny shred of hope somewhere still breathing inside of me. How many FWS have cheated on prior relationships? Can you tell me why this time it's different for you?


D-day #1 - April 29, 2009

Beauty is a calling...a call "to transfigure what has harden or was wounded within you"
-- John O'Donohue


Posts: 5424 | Registered: Apr 2009
Bluebear1985
♀ Member
Member # 30686
Default  Posted: 12:24 PM, January 27th (Thursday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have a question. While you WS's were having your A's, did you still look to have intimate relations with your spouse? Did you just have relations with them to keep them from getting suspicious? Or did you not have relations with them at all?

I ask because since I first found out about my WH's A over a year ago, he's only seemed to actually WANT to have relations with me once. Every other time he either says he's too sore or tired or I initiate it and it feels like he's just going along with it but he's not really interested. Any insight would be helpful?

FYI, we had a good physical relationship before I first found out. Once or twice a week usually.


Me: 25
WH: 34
M : 4.5 year
DD: Initial October 2009, but have found out much since then
2 young children together, aged 2 and 4

Posts: 146 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: Alberta, Canada
mactruck
♀ Member
Member # 29791
Default  Posted: 12:32 PM, January 27th (Thursday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How many FWS have cheated on prior relationships? Can you tell me why this time it's different for you?

I've never cheated before. However, I did always leave one guy for the next. I never had time alone in between dating. I'll also say I've been with my H since we were teenagers so my "dating" life was based on high school boyfriends.

I tried to have an exit affair along with some other issues I had. Not that I thought I would "run off into the sunset" with OM. But having someone else to "fall back" on was a thought that was in my screwed up head at the time.

I know I will never do this again. I can't live with myself. Forget the consequences, I can't live with me. I can't even stand when people hug me now. Talk about high walls and boundaries.


While you WS's were having your A's, did you still look to have intimate relations with your spouse? Did you just have relations with them to keep them from getting suspicious? Or did you not have relations with them at all?

Yes. I compartimilzed the A and the M. I never thought about OM when I was initmate with my H. I always enjoyed my H in the bedroom. In fact, the OM was quiet horrible at it. The aspect of the relationship I was after was the emotional connection. Not the physical connection.



There is no spell check. My typing is horrible... Therefore I apologize for errors.

I pray everyday for forgiveness.


Posts: 149 | Registered: Oct 2010
DevastatedTwice
♀ Member
Member # 29061
Default  Posted: 12:52 PM, January 27th (Thursday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks to all you WS's for your willingness to answer questions.

I've survived two of my WH's affairs. After the first (which was just a couple of months and mostly just physical), he was completely remorseful and did everything right for a year and a half (except really figure out why he had an A since I did go through it again): gave me all passwords, left his job to get away from OW, listened very tenderly to every question, fear, and concern and responded perfectly. I could tell my heart meant everything to him and he would do anything to heal us. He would reassure me constantly, on his own, and write me emails and texts telling me how much I meant to him and how he couldn't believe he almost lost me. He was a saint and I melted every time we were together.

After affair 2, which was over a year long and he was emotionally and physically involved, he is doing all the right things (transparent, telling me his whereabouts, NC with OW, counseling, 12-step group for his SA issues, answers questions, etc.) but I can tell his heart isn't in it. I had my guess of what might be going on in his heart which he confirmed. He is a very sensitive person and has a really hard time when he hurts someone. Well, his second affair was completely devastating. There is 100x more pain than the first and I know he can hardly stand it. So when he sees me in pain and has to face what he's done, I feel this distance from him...like he can't handle how he's hurt me. But of course for me, this makes me feel like he doesn't care or even worse, like he's doing something wrong. I have no red flags that would show me that he's doing something wrong. I think the issue is that its just too painful for him to face what he's done. He can face it to the point of doing the right things....but can't face it to the point where he "feels" my heart...if that makes sense.

Did any of you go through a period like that? If so, did it change and how?


Me - BS - 39
Him - WH, SA - 39
Married 17 yrs.
3 kids- 16, 13, 8
Dday#1 - 3/16/07 PA
D-day#2- 9/21/09 PA, began recovery 6/8/10
D-day#3- 11-8-10 False recovery.
D-Day#4- 12/27/11 Third PA, divorcing
Divorced- 6/6/12

Posts: 405 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: California
Bluebear1985
♀ Member
Member # 30686
Default  Posted: 6:00 PM, January 27th (Thursday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I guess it's kind of like that with my husband. He is usually sweet and humorous but as soon as I bring up his A, he either gets angry and refuses to talk about it or he detaches.


Me: 25
WH: 34
M : 4.5 year
DD: Initial October 2009, but have found out much since then
2 young children together, aged 2 and 4

Posts: 146 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: Alberta, Canada
BaxtersBFF
♂ Member
Member # 26859
Default  Posted: 6:55 AM, January 29th (Saturday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

icbtih8,

I have cheated, been cheated on, and been the OM in past relationships. Played all the roles.

Why is it different? I suspect you are meaning long-term prior relationships. Well, for me, all of those past relationships were only a few months in duration. So one of the main differences is that I was married for 14 years when I cheated on my BW. Another reason is the kids. Third reason is that I have a desire to be honest with myself. Last is that I have a desire to fix myself in this M.

The easy thing to do would be to run. Running in my situation is avoiding. I have done that too much already. I'll still run, but not from my M.


WH - 44
BW - gerrygirl

Posts: 6036 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Boise
BaxtersBFF
♂ Member
Member # 26859
Default  Posted: 7:07 AM, January 29th (Saturday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Blue,

While you WS's were having your A's, did you still look to have intimate relations with your spouse?
No, but we did.
Did you just have relations with them to keep them from getting suspicious?
Yes, that was part of it. The other part was HB (daily) started for her. I think that I knew I should want to go along despite me being very foggy.

I ask because since I first found out about my WH's A over a year ago, he's only seemed to actually WANT to have relations with me once.
This isn't surprising. After having cheated on your spouse, it is often very difficult to overcome the shame and guilt. I think most people understand sex in a marriage to be a very intimate, personal experience. To have thrown that gift away, pissed on it, trampled it with a herd of lies, only to have it offered with love again is difficult to understand, difficult to accept. Right after d-day, it is very difficult for a WS to understand how their BS could love them.
FYI, we had a good physical relationship before I first found out. Once or twice a week usually.


WH - 44
BW - gerrygirl

Posts: 6036 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Boise
keepyourheadup
♂ Member
Member # 30513
Default  Posted: 7:32 AM, January 29th (Saturday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hello WS-

The most difficult part of my situation is how quickly my marriage is dissolving and how my WW seems to be taking the next step with the OM rapidly. We have only been separated for about 6 weeks (DD on Dec 14) and she is planning to move away with OM and start a new life. Nevertheless, I have retained a lawyer and filed for legal separation- can't divorce for 6 months. Prior to DD, my WW and I were planning to have children and start a family together. I thought we had a wonderful M and our friends/family are shocked.

I guess my questions are:

Have you ever jumped from your M to another relationship to avoid reality?

What did it take for the fog to be lifted?

If you left your BS for the OP without closure, were you ultimately happy in your new relationship?

Thank you for your insight.

[This message edited by keepyourheadup at 7:33 AM, January 29th (Saturday)]


Posts: 146 | Registered: Dec 2010
BaxtersBFF
♂ Member
Member # 26859
Default  Posted: 1:48 PM, January 29th (Saturday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Keepyourheadup,

Have you ever jumped from your M to another relationship to avoid reality?
That's what an A is. An escape from reality.

What did it take for the fog to be lifted?
My BW packed a bag and was ready to go. She made the choice to finally take care of herself.

If you left your BS for the OP without closure, were you ultimately happy in your new relationship?
Any WS who finds themselves is a situation like this isn't allowed on SI, unless it is from a previous marriage, so not sure if you will find an answer to this. But, I have the example of my FIL and his wife. He left my MIL for his current wife 30 years ago. They seem to be happily married after all this time. But I have seen and heard regret in my FIL for his decisions back then. If he had it to do over, he likely would not have chosen to cheat.


Since you are S, headed to D, and your WW is moving away with OM, I am not sure there is anything you can do except to 180 in everything. No communication except through your lawyer. She may come to realize her mistakes in all of this, but by that time you might have decided to move on. Either way, it's your choice.


WH - 44
BW - gerrygirl

Posts: 6036 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Boise
WheredoIgonow
♀ Member
Member # 27130
Default  Posted: 2:44 PM, January 29th (Saturday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How long did it take you to "get over" your OP??

I'm a BS .. and I would like to know from WS who felt like they were "in love" with the OP and that they found "true happiness" - in just a short period of time...
How long did it take you to REALLY "get over" the OP.. or would you say you always will hold a special place in your heart for them....

Starting from the true NC... how long would you say?? Did it just happen slowly over time... or did you just hit a point in your R... (or IC or MC) where you thought.. what was I thinking.

My FWH has been NC with the OW for over 15 months... He had a really, really hard time getting "over" her.. though... I don't think he totally is... and he says he is... but then he says other things that show that he doesn't.

I dont think we can REALLY move forward like we should without him truly letting it all go.

What are some WS perspectives.. especially WH.

Thanks


Me; BS (54)
Him: WS (56)
Married 29 years
DD-28, DS-26, DS-18, DS-16
OW#1 - PA - 4 1/2 years
OW#2 - EA/PA - 5 months
He thought she was his soulmate - was going to move out- confessed about OW#2 when asked. OW#1 revealed them.

Posts: 605 | Registered: Jan 2010
GroundZero
♀ Member
Member # 27853
Default  Posted: 3:53 PM, January 29th (Saturday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WheredoIgonow-

I am not sure I am the best suited to answer your question, because I am a fWW and R was never on the table for my now xBH and I. DDay was Oct 09, and I ended the A on New Year's Eve 09, went NC same day, though both OM and OMBW orchestrated "run ins" with me (with different motivations, obviously) until August 2010.

I felt those deep emotions for OM that you describe that your husband did as well. Depending on how you measure it, the A has been over for more than a year and I have been in NC for that same amount of time, but true and complete NC for 5 months. I am still getting over him. It is a process, not a wake up one day and think "what was I thinking?" sort of thing. But again, I truly believe some WSs really do have that moment of clarity. I didn't and will not.

It is not fair to you to have to watch your husband go through the mourning period for this A and to have him compare your relationship to the A. Whether the feelings were real or not, a relationship that has endured a quarter-century+ will never have the same euphoric feelings of the early days of a romantic relationship.

I am so sorry that you are going through this, feeling like you are in competition with a fantasy. From reading your other posts, it seems like his focus is totally upside down - he is focusing on how YOU can recreate the fantasy for HIM. He needs to take some major time looking within himself on his own and with an IC to see why he seeks that out at the expense of his marriage to an amazing woman. It also sounds like from your description that he has a huge KISA thing going on. Has he been in IC? The first step for him has to be realizing that this resides in him. This is not evidence of a flaw within YOU or your marriage. Period.


Out of clutter, find simplicity; out of discord, find harmony; in the middle of difficulty lies opportunity. Einstein

Posts: 1777 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: Land of the Sweet Lovely Kiddos
WheredoIgonow
♀ Member
Member # 27130
Default  Posted: 4:54 PM, January 29th (Saturday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Groundzero,

Thanks for responding. It is good insight.

He has been in IC for over 15 months. We would never be where we are without that. We've also done MC too for almost 1 1/2 (less in the last few months).

However, I realized probably the whole reason he was going to IC was to work on getting over or sorting out his feelings for the OW... As I say now to him.. the hard work is now for US...

He says he sees it... but like you can all see - he has a long way to go

He's always been the KISA kind of guy to everyone.

Unfortunately, with our quarter-century relationship comes taking me for granted and not appreciating me.

I have worked on myself and owned up to my issues to the marriage. But I have always been the main bread winner, main caretaker of the kids, and the typical wife running the household.... including taking care of him.

He's a good guy. Unfortunately more selfish than I thought and very immature.

He's finally had to "grow up" or at least try to.

We'll see.


Me; BS (54)
Him: WS (56)
Married 29 years
DD-28, DS-26, DS-18, DS-16
OW#1 - PA - 4 1/2 years
OW#2 - EA/PA - 5 months
He thought she was his soulmate - was going to move out- confessed about OW#2 when asked. OW#1 revealed them.

Posts: 605 | Registered: Jan 2010
socrates179
♀ New Member
Member # 29579
Default  Posted: 10:06 PM, January 31st (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

New Question:
To all Wayward Spouses. I am a BS and my FWH and I are out of MC and recovering. I posted a thread on the Recociliation Forum titled How Do We Know and it was so wonderful and actually great for me to read. It lead me to a followup question which I thought maybe some FWS might be able to answer. How do you KNOW that you wont have another affair again?
I know this may be too painful for you and I am so grateful to anyone who responds. My FWH says he KNOWS with every ounce of his fiber that he would never again because of the pain he has seen it caused me and because he sees what he has nearly lost. But as it is only 5 months from my DDay I still have issues with trust and security and faith in him.

So I wa wondering how those of you who have been on the other side KNOW and what you might be able to tell me. Obviously I would love to believe my FWH and trust completely and that is why I ask.

Thanks to any and all who respond.


All I know is that I don't know anything.....Socrates
BS 44
WH 47
DD 24
DS 17
D Day 8/16/10
Real Story 8/19/10
Recovering, but not saying recovered

Posts: 32 | Registered: Sep 2010 | From: texas
mactruck
♀ Member
Member # 29791
Default  Posted: 1:25 PM, February 1st (Tuesday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I KNOW I will never have an A again. There are a list of reasons.

1. I respect myself.
2. I respect my H and want to honor him. I've caused him too much pain to do this again. I couldn't bare it.
3. My kids. I have DDs. They deserve a decent mother.
4. Why I didn't think about STD's before god only knows. But StD's scare me. Ithink I would abstain if we were to D.
5. The thought of it grosses me out.
6. I have boundaries. VERY HIGH boundaries.
7. GOD. I am a Christian. I understand the concept of forgiveness. I am repenting.
8. Life - My H would absolutly kill me. I know this to be true. I would literally kill me.
9. I feel gross everyday for what I've done.
10. No matter what happens in my M I want to be a great woman. Having another A is NOT being a great woman.
11. Did I mention it's gross? I don't even read romance novels because I think it's gross.
12. If I'm lucky enough to get to true R and he loves me again. I will spend all my life making our lives great. He deserves that.

These are in no order, but just to list a few off the top of my head. Some may be childish. But they are real to me.


There is no spell check. My typing is horrible... Therefore I apologize for errors.

I pray everyday for forgiveness.


Posts: 149 | Registered: Oct 2010
LisaBrandNew
♀ Member
Member # 30522
Default  Posted: 7:14 PM, February 1st (Tuesday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My WH left me 6 mos. ago for a sexually acting out teenager. By the book MLC. I have 180'd almost from the beginning, with occasional tears. He has been very nice, helpful for months. She moved out of state last week, says he doesn't love her, ended it. He says he wants to talk to me, but needs to figure why he did it. He said he knows "this is very bad," and says he is working on his conflict avoidance. He asked me what he needs to do? I told him he has to figure that out for himself and told him about SI. It has been a few weeks now. Can remorse be so severe that the WS never tries to reconcile? Will he find a new OW to avoid the pain and consequences of his affair? I watch and wait. I don't want to rescue him (working on my own codependency)so I don't initiate any discussions. He seems lost in his head. I can't imagine that he will ever face me with his whole heart (remorse) - seems like it would be too overwhelming for him.


Finally living the life I was meant to live.

Posts: 804 | Registered: Dec 2010
BrokenRoad
♀ Member
Member # 15334
Default  Posted: 8:02 PM, February 1st (Tuesday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

[ETA: this was for RKT429SS's post back on page one because I am a dork and thought I was on the last page! ]

He'd asked about a WW that was getting angry when he brought up the A:

Still, if she acts this way when you need to talk about it, then she isn't yet doing 100% of what she should.

I just recently learned this lesson, but I can say that I was so glad when I learned how to really listen and help my BS instead of getting upset about him bringing it up.

The feeling is still there, the upset, but now the cycle is broken.

The cycle being:
1. He brings up the A and how it makes him feel now.
2. She gets angry that hes touching the old wound in her, forgetting that its a wound in him.
3. He gets mad that she is mad, when it is she who had the affair in the first place.
4. She feels guilty for not being supportive, and then angry at herself for not listening yet again when he needed it.
5. He tries to fix it by dropping it, maybe not bringing it up next time.
6. His progress slows.
7. It builds up enough that he brings it up again.
8. See step 2, back to the beginning.

[This message edited by BrokenRoad at 8:29 PM, February 1st (Tuesday)]


{Him}FBH - 43 (WifeHad5)
{Me} FWW - 43
2 kids 7 & 12
Reconciled :)
Beauty and folly are old companions.--Benjamin Franklin

Posts: 10423 | Registered: Jul 2007 | From: Midwest
HUFI-PUFI
♂ Member
Member # 25460
Default  Posted: 4:01 PM, February 2nd (Wednesday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

LisaBrandNew -He asked me what he needs to do? I told him he has to figure that out for himself and told him about SI.

Bravo for pointing him into the direction of SI. While you didnít yet say that he is actually here and participating yet, at least if he decides to heal himself, he will have the tools and support that he needs in the WS forum.

LisaBrandNew - Can remorse be so severe that the WS never tries to reconcile? Will he find a new OW to avoid the pain and consequences of his affair?

I wish that I could simply tell you NO but in truth, I fear that sometimes the remorse and guilt of the affair is simply so staggering when it hits that it can cause emotional paralysis. How can I try to work out reconciliation if I am the guilty party? How will she ever be able to have an emotionally fulfilling life with me? Maybe she deserves a chance at happiness with someone else. ... These are all thoughts that might be going through his head right now.

Unknown Poster - The mind of a WS is a very sordid, confused place during the preamble, main body, and post mortem of an A. Don't give us too much credit for rational thought.

In fact, if you are practicing the 180 and are giving him space, there is a risk that the emotional distance is creating its own dynamic which can create some very consuming thought process. A WS looks for a certain emotional connectivity (call it hope for a future) in order to drive forward the commitment for reconciliation. After all, each emotional meltdown of anger and hurt is seen as a signal of rejection to a certain extend and unless itís clearly stated from you to him that R is the desired outcome, he might jump to conclusions that are not very accurate ones.

Well, if he finds another OW to focus on, it will only be a temporary reprieve for any of the problems that are in his life. Yes, the affair might lack a certain reality but sooner rather than later, he has to come back to the real world of bills and family and his wife who is seeking a divorce.

The reality is that the affair can be a wakeup call to the WS as much as it is for the BS. Perhaps as the cold splash of the 180 and the end of the affair hits him, he will make decisions about his marriage and his life that does not include reconciliation. Thatís a possibility that you have to accept.

Your practicing the 180 and thatís is for your own emotional wellbeing. IF you take care of yourself, first and foremost, then regardless of his decision, you can and will survive. Donít forget, you have the right to establish lines in the sand and perhaps you have to clearly articulate to him that you need a timely decision regarding reconciliation. You can insist that he decide, choose and commit without dragging this out for weeks and months.

HUFI


Donít listen to your head, itís easily confused. Donít listen to your heart, its fickle. Listen to your soul, God doesn't steer you wrong.

Posts: 3218 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: Azilda, Northern Ontario
LisaBrandNew
♀ Member
Member # 30522
Default  Posted: 8:26 PM, February 2nd (Wednesday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hufi - thank you so much for your reply. You have excellent insight. I do feel that I need to let my husband know that there is hope. It is hard to find just the right words to let him know the door is not shut yet, but not enable him. He is very conflict avoidant and passive aggressive. I was always the one to reach out, to try to figure him out. The 180 has helped me to focus on myself and did have an effect on my husband. He became kinder and more helpful almost immediately. It is a complicated balance - I feel that he should show true remorse first and be the one to ask for a chance at reconciliation. His shame and guilt are causing him to look inward for the first time in his life. He absolutely could never see his issues before this nightmare began. Although he is overwhelmed and probably very confused about his actions, his affair has been so traumatic that it could be the thing that finally brings him to his knees to face very painful childhood issues. I don't want to interfere with that process. If he feels safe in reconciliation, I don't think he will do the emotional work, or at least to such a deep degree. I just need to find the right words. I am broken, but I do love him. He made a terrible mistake. I know that if he would fight for me, to show true remorse, assure me that he loves me, and do the hard work, I would try. It is so painful to see the nice things he does for me, but won't talk to me from his heart. I also don't want to be manipulated - passive aggressives are complicated. Any suggestions on the right words - I would like to say them tonight. He is watching our children at my home since I work late. Next visitation is 3 days later.


Finally living the life I was meant to live.

Posts: 804 | Registered: Dec 2010
HUFI-PUFI
♂ Member
Member # 25460
Default  Posted: 7:53 AM, February 3rd (Thursday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((LisaBrandNew))

Play him these two songs. Make him watch the videos. Stand by him as he does. If he can't or won't open up after this, his heart is elsewhere.

Martina McBride - How Far

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aU5uPbXXSfc

There's a boat, I could sail away
There's the sky, I could catch a plane
There's a train, there's the tracks
I could leave and I could choose to not come back
Oh never come back

There you are, giving up the fight
Here I am begging you to try
Talk to me, let me in
But you just put your wall back up again
Oh when's it gonna end

[Chorus:]
How far do I have to go to make you understand
I wanna make this work so much it hurts, but I just can't
Keep on giving, go on living with the way things are
So I'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say how far

There's a chance I could change my mind
But I won't, not till you decide
What you want, what you need
Do you even care if I stay or leave
Oh, what's it gonna be

[Chorus]

Out of this chair, or just across the room
Halfway down the block or halfway to the moon

How far do I have to go to make you understand
I wanna make this work so much it hurts, but I just can't
Keep on giving, go on living with the way things are
So I'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say
YeahI'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say how far

Reba McEntire - Consider me Gone

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cw_L8HdoYgo

Every time I turn the conversation
To something deeper than the weather
I can feel you always shuttin' down
And when I need an explanation for the silence
You just tell me you don't wanna talk about it now

What you're not saying is coming in loud and clear
We're at a crossroads here

If I'm not the one thing you can't stand to lose
If I'm not that arrow to the heart of you
If you don't get drunk on my kiss
If you think you can do better than this
Then I guess, we're done, let's not drag this on
Consider me gone

With you I've always been wide open
Like a window or an ocean
There is nothing I've ever tried to hide
So when you leave me not knowin' where you're goin'
I start thinkin' that we're lookin', we're lookin' at goodbye

How about a strong shot of honesty?
Don't you owe that to me?

If I'm not the one thing you can't stand to lose
If I'm not that arrow to the heart of you
If you don't get drunk on my kiss
If you think you can do better than this
Then I guess, we're done, let's not drag this on
Consider me gone

Consider me a memory, consider me the past
Consider me a smile in an old photograph
Someone who used to make you laugh

If I'm not the one thing you can't stand to lose
If I'm not that arrow to the heart of you
Then I guess, we're done, let's not drag this on
Consider me gone, consider me gone
Consider me gone, just consider me gone

[This message edited by HUFI-PUFI at 7:55 AM, February 3rd (Thursday)]


Donít listen to your head, itís easily confused. Donít listen to your heart, its fickle. Listen to your soul, God doesn't steer you wrong.

Posts: 3218 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: Azilda, Northern Ontario
Topic Posts: 1000
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