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Newest Member: NeverAgain0 (44719)

Just Found Out Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Before You Say Reconcile...
bufffalo
♂ Member
Member # 21854
Default  Posted: 9:56 PM, April 8th (Sunday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


DDay 9/25/2008
R started 11/10/08
BH-me

Posts: 5819 | Registered: Dec 2008 | From: Texas
SuperDuperWonderboy
♂ Member
Member # 34716
Default  Posted: 1:07 PM, April 10th (Tuesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


My Friends call me Wonderboy--That's Mr. SuperduperWonderboy to you Tred.


Posts: 1272 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Everett
annb
♀ Member
Member # 22386
Default  Posted: 9:15 AM, April 11th (Wednesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump

Posts: 7472 | Registered: Jan 2009 | From: Northeast
DixieDiamondfly
♀ Member
Member # 34830
Default  Posted: 10:25 PM, April 11th (Wednesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you for this post. My Dday was Feb 8th and the day I confronted him (I call it "fan" day for "stuff hits the fan") was Feb 24th. He has apologized and says it is in no way my fault and has said he would do anything I want him to do. He has done the few things that I have asked. When I ask him questions he answers them...but how do I know that he is answering honestly and completely? Honestly, I'm feeling the red flags again...and I've learned to go with my gut.


BS: Me, 53 yrs. young
WS: Him, 56 yo
KIDS: 29 yo son, 27 yo son, 22 yo daughter...and three wonderful grandsons
Married 31 yrs.
D-Day #1: 2/8/12
D-Day #2: 7/16/2012
Beginning R

Posts: 126 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Gulf Coast
Fighting2Survive
♀ Member
Member # 28410
Default  Posted: 8:17 AM, April 15th (Sunday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump


Me: BW, 40.......Him: FWH, 40
D-day: 3-22-10
DS1: 11, DS2: crawling
Status: R going well

"When you can tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain, you know it is healed." - Iyanla Vanzant, Broken Pieces


Posts: 7279 | Registered: Apr 2010 | From: NC
AttemptStrength
♀ Member
Member # 27947
Default  Posted: 8:38 AM, April 20th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump


BS me
WS him x2 A's
1 autistic DS

I'd never have spent the money on a wedding dress if I knew I was just going to a costume party.


Posts: 1992 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: Wisconsin
windows
Member
Member # 14054
Default  Posted: 7:05 PM, April 24th (Tuesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump for a friend

Posts: 397 | Registered: Mar 2007
bufffalo
♂ Member
Member # 21854
Default  Posted: 7:31 AM, April 27th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


DDay 9/25/2008
R started 11/10/08
BH-me

Posts: 5819 | Registered: Dec 2008 | From: Texas
Fighting2Survive
♀ Member
Member # 28410
Default  Posted: 3:00 PM, May 10th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Me: BW, 40.......Him: FWH, 40
D-day: 3-22-10
DS1: 11, DS2: crawling
Status: R going well

"When you can tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain, you know it is healed." - Iyanla Vanzant, Broken Pieces


Posts: 7279 | Registered: Apr 2010 | From: NC
annb
♀ Member
Member # 22386
Default  Posted: 3:35 PM, May 11th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bump.

Posts: 7472 | Registered: Jan 2009 | From: Northeast
SisterMilkshake
♀ Member
Member # 30024
Default  Posted: 11:32 AM, May 17th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


BW (me) 50ish FWH 50ish
Married 34 years, 3 children
d-day 3/10 LTA (4 yrs./fucking & flirting)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson


Posts: 9539 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: The Great White North USA
Outdoornut1
♂ Member
Member # 35446
Default  Posted: 12:36 PM, May 17th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for the bump!


Me-BS
Wife-WS
D-day- 1/17/2012
2 Beautiful Girls
Future- unknown
"You are 50% responsible for the problems before the affair..WS is 100% responsible for choosing to cheat." Confused615

Posts: 154 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Northern NY
Downrightpissed
♀ New Member
Member # 35347
Default  Posted: 12:44 PM, May 17th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So glad this was bumped..I would of never saw it. Here's a question...my spouse has done everything in the first column aside from actually backing his words with actions. He is transparent, hads had NC, and says he is sorry and it will never happen again..he is mindful of my triggers and answers any and all questions I have...but...he doesn't go above and beyond to show that he still wants me. I get I love you's but honestly that means little anymore. I cannot look at him and say I love him as much as I did before the A. Is this me blocking the R? If he is doing everything else right should I be expecting more remorseful actions??


Me. BS. 40
WH - 41 PA 4 years
DDAY 12/7/11
Married 16 years
3 kids, 15,12 and 9
Currently trying to R

Posts: 42 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Michigan
annb
♀ Member
Member # 22386
Default  Posted: 9:01 PM, May 19th (Saturday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump

Posts: 7472 | Registered: Jan 2009 | From: Northeast
chloecat1
♀ Member
Member # 35585
Default  Posted: 9:07 AM, May 20th (Sunday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Definitely a rug-sweeper here. POS WH shows no remorse what-so-ever. Unless HE does a drastic 180 on his actions as well, there will be no reconciliation here. I failed miserably at the 180 yesterday when he was in town. He's not around enough to even see me 180 anyway. Doesn't call. Just goes on with his merry life with the OW.


Him:WH-51, Me:BS-47
DD-21 DS-18
Married 27 years, together 30
Divorced May 2013~FINALLY!
1st A: 19 yrs ago, but dday not until 7/12/08
2nd Dday- 10/3/11, separated since then.
3rd DDay- 8/10/12 Admitted to other ONS and PAs.
Suing WH for di

Posts: 233 | Registered: May 2012
lordhasaplan?
♂ Member
Member # 30079
Default  Posted: 8:38 AM, May 24th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bump!


D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
No life should be passively relinquished due to the toxicity of others and taking steps to protect yourself may very well be the most important steps you will ever take.

Posts: 1889 | Registered: Nov 2010
Edie
♀ Member
Member # 26133
Default  Posted: 2:55 PM, May 30th (Wednesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump.


Maybe a long walk in the Hindu Kush would do it?
BW (me) 52
FWS 55
Together 29 years; 2 DDs 15 & 12
Dday Dec 08 (confessed) Feb 09 16 other OW confessed. OW17 tried her unedifying hardest until Aug 09. R'd.

Posts: 5059 | Registered: Nov 2009 | From: UK
Fighting2Survive
♀ Member
Member # 28410
Default  Posted: 3:14 PM, June 8th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Me: BW, 40.......Him: FWH, 40
D-day: 3-22-10
DS1: 11, DS2: crawling
Status: R going well

"When you can tell the story and it doesn't bring up any pain, you know it is healed." - Iyanla Vanzant, Broken Pieces


Posts: 7279 | Registered: Apr 2010 | From: NC
woundedby2
♀ Member
Member # 18522
Default  Posted: 8:28 PM, June 13th (Wednesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump


Me: BS
2 kids: DD15 and DS18
Him: The Assclown NPD
OW: "friend" of 15 years
Divorced! Feb. 2010

Everybody, soon or late, sits down to a banquet of consequences.
~Robert Louis Stevenson


Posts: 7803 | Registered: Mar 2008 | From: SoCal
lordhasaplan?
♂ Member
Member # 30079
Default  Posted: 10:05 AM, June 19th (Tuesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
No life should be passively relinquished due to the toxicity of others and taking steps to protect yourself may very well be the most important steps you will ever take.

Posts: 1889 | Registered: Nov 2010
Topic Posts: 389
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