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User Topic: Betrayed Spouse S.T. D. Support
southsidecali
♀ Member
Member # 22752
Default  Posted: 1:23 PM, January 11th (Wednesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How the hell can you not stress when waiting for HPV testing in order to avoid an outbreak?

I am stressing and an emotional wreck.

I have no one to talk to about this because I am so ashamed and I haven't even gotten around to telling people the real reason why we split up a year ago.


Posts: 819 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: CA
painpaingoaway
♀ Member
Member # 27196
Default  Posted: 6:23 PM, January 11th (Wednesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

skeerd, yes, some STD's can have an EXTREMELY foul odor!

southside, you can talk to us...


me BS female 56/him WS 59
Married 33 years
D-day July 09/he gave me his slut's STD
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk

Posts: 7057 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Coastal South
southsidecali
♀ Member
Member # 22752
Default  Posted: 11:21 PM, January 17th (Tuesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I go for my results tomorrow. I hope its something minor.

I tried to keep busy all week to not thing about it but now its THERE> I have to deal with it.


Posts: 819 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: CA
survivor65
♀ Member
Member # 34402
Default  Posted: 4:56 AM, January 20th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I had my first STD test done a few days after DDay.

Results..BV and HSV. The dr told me the BV was most likely not related to the A, as I had been on meds from 2 surgeries. However, the HSV was and was recent to within a month of my test. (had only been with him 1 time since cleared from surgeries--of course he had been with her 1 time a few days earlier ) No answer as to whether it was type 1 or 2, was too early. Only 'combined' test was positive. It was at 1.61

FF 3 months--2nd test done this week: came back totally negative. Dr thinks that 1st test was false positive/lab error. Will re-test in another 3 months. So when discrepancy in my tests came back...fWH went to a clinic to do anonymous STD testing the same day..should have results today/tomorrow from his. (he is in process of acquiring insurance so had to find anonymous one)


UPDATE***** fWH test came back negative across the board!

Called my dr back...confirmed ---I AM CLEAR!!!!!

[This message edited by survivor65 at 5:30 PM, January 20th (Friday)]


BS Me 46
FWH Him 47 (extremely remorseful)
Married 22 /Together 24
DDay 09/26/11
Working very hard on R...
'My Journal' has my Healing Poetry--feel free to read

Posts: 269 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: the twilight zone!
0115
♀ Member
Member # 31740
Default  Posted: 11:37 PM, January 20th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Great news Survivor!!! Enjoy the weekend


BS (me) 49
FWH 49 newbeg2011
Married 29 years
Very Long LTA
DD 01/15/11-6/30/11
The hard work is done...let the healing begin.

Posts: 1011 | Registered: Apr 2011
0115
♀ Member
Member # 31740
Default  Posted: 11:47 PM, January 20th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Anyone with HPV just itch like crazy sometimes? Comes and goes and is not yeast infection...ugh!!!


BS (me) 49
FWH 49 newbeg2011
Married 29 years
Very Long LTA
DD 01/15/11-6/30/11
The hard work is done...let the healing begin.

Posts: 1011 | Registered: Apr 2011
ThoughtIKnewYa
♀ Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 9:41 PM, January 21st (Saturday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just a little update: I went back to the medical university for a biopsy to see if they could grow the hsv in a lab and determine which meds it's resistant to, but there were no lesions. The doc said it looked like the latest meds (Famvir) worked and told me just to contact her if it happened again. After a month on the outbreak dosage of Famvir, I dropped down to the suppressive dose...

Three days later, it came back. I'm scared. Of course, it's the weekend and I can't talk to a doc, so I went back to the outbreak dose. I just pray that it doesn't get as bad this time. Headed back to the University, I suppose.

On the up side, she *said* there were no visible signs of HPV, but I'm still waiting on the pap results to confirm that.


Posts: 11685 | Registered: Mar 2008
Just K
♀ New Member
Member # 34611
Default  Posted: 9:25 AM, January 22nd (Sunday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I found out about the affair from my dr when I was there for my yearly checkup. He didn't tell me but when I came up positive it kind of put the peices together. This was my gyn that I'd been seeing for many years who very nicely asked if we needed to be checking for STDS. (I didn't know but suspicions made me say yes.)
I'm clear now, it was treatable, but I still feel dirty. Sometimes I 'm never going to feel clean again and it's all his fault.

Posts: 4 | Registered: Jan 2012
forgivingnow
♀ Member
Member # 33549
Default  Posted: 9:13 AM, January 23rd (Monday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am still wondering if anyone has dealt with the STD Molluscum? My husband has had several spots burned off, did anyone get this from their spouse, how long did the virus last?


Me-BS 51
FWH-51
M 31 yrs.
Dday 3-19-11, TT 10/2011, Full truth July 2013
Strength comes from within. You can't get it from someone or go somewhere to get it. It is already here, waiting to be used when you need it most. Believe in yourself.
R

Posts: 612 | Registered: Oct 2011
painpaingoaway
♀ Member
Member # 27196
Default  Posted: 9:24 AM, February 2nd (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I found out about the affair from my dr
Me too honey. Embarassing, isn't it?


me BS female 56/him WS 59
Married 33 years
D-day July 09/he gave me his slut's STD
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk

Posts: 7057 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Coastal South
cdnmommy
♀ Member
Member # 30182
Default  Posted: 7:22 PM, February 3rd (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am embarrassed to admit that I haven't been tested for STDs. I was so humiliated and fWH said he was clean. Well, he had lab work today for a suspected bladder infection and it came back negative,but the doctor thinks it might be chlamydia. I am beside myself. I have had 2 miscarriages in the last 6 months, and maybe this is why. I feel so incredibly stupid stupid stupid. Now I have to go to my doctor and ask for the whole range of tests. I wish I had been braver before and just done it.i feel like such a fool.

I was feeling so good today and now I just want to crawl in a hole and die for being such a fucking idiot!


Me: BW
DDay: Oct 2010 + 6 weeks false R
2.5 (+?) year A with married coworker/my "friend"
1 great kid.
Reconciling and healing

Posts: 1732 | Registered: Nov 2010
painpaingoaway
♀ Member
Member # 27196
Default  Posted: 8:04 PM, February 3rd (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((cdnmommy))))
I have had 2 miscarriages in the last 6 months, and maybe this is why

I am so sorry.
This is the very reason I tell ALL newbies to get tested...

There is simply NO WAY for any of us to know who is 'clean' and who isn't.

You are NOT stupid, just naive...like we all were, once. upon. a. time.


me BS female 56/him WS 59
Married 33 years
D-day July 09/he gave me his slut's STD
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk

Posts: 7057 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Coastal South
ThoughtIKnewYa
♀ Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 8:22 PM, February 3rd (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((((((cdnmommy)))))))

Posts: 11685 | Registered: Mar 2008
0115
♀ Member
Member # 31740
Default  Posted: 8:33 PM, February 3rd (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Cdnmommy)))

I hope everything turns out OK. So sorry about the miscarriages.

0115


BS (me) 49
FWH 49 newbeg2011
Married 29 years
Very Long LTA
DD 01/15/11-6/30/11
The hard work is done...let the healing begin.

Posts: 1011 | Registered: Apr 2011
cdnmommy
♀ Member
Member # 30182
Default  Posted: 1:06 PM, February 4th (Saturday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

After an agonizing night and some good talks, I am convinced that this doesn't change anything in terms of what I want and my commitment to R. However, it is a shock that this is coming up NOW and I feel responsible for being so embarrassed as to allow myself to skip that important step. I have an appointment with my doctor booked on Tuesday as a follow up to the last miscarriage, and I will ask for testing for everything then. I know they tested for chlamydia, syphilis, etc when I was pregnant with my son 4 years ago, so anything that comes up now is "new" (i.e. from the A.)

The things I am struggling with are my own guilt over not getting tested, as well as my worries that there is "more" than the LTA. I am trying to trust my gut, something I was poor at doing in the past, and my gut tells me there is no more but it is not always easy to put out of my mind.

It is possible, of course, that fWH's test will come back negative. The doctor mentioned that aside from a UTI it could be diabetes or possibly kidney stones, but didn't sound like he thought that was very likely. It doesn't change anything in terms of what I must do, which is get tested and insist that fWH get tested for everything else as well. It also doesn't change the anxiety I am experiencing now and will be until this gets answered. However, it would put my mind at ease if I couldn't tie the miscarriages back to this.

Thanks for being here, everyone.


Me: BW
DDay: Oct 2010 + 6 weeks false R
2.5 (+?) year A with married coworker/my "friend"
1 great kid.
Reconciling and healing

Posts: 1732 | Registered: Nov 2010
Sapphire_blue
♀ Member
Member # 34074
Default  Posted: 4:12 PM, February 5th (Sunday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just to clarify: you CAN get rested for HPV, it's new (I was tested 8/11) they test DNA from cells in your cervix & uterus.


I think NIKs DD said it best "Mom, are married people even supposed to be on dating sites?"

"Forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could have been any different. ― Oprah Winfrey


Posts: 887 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: USA
cdnmommy
♀ Member
Member # 30182
Default  Posted: 8:10 PM, February 6th (Monday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good news for a change!

fWH's test results came back today and he was negative for what they tested for: chlamydia and mycoplasma genitalium. And his doctor sent in a req for the rest of his tests. I see my doctor tomorrow.

I apologized to fWH for how hard I was to deal with this weekend and he said "you have nothing to apologize for. You should never have been in this position to begin with."

He's right, of course, but I do wish I had been able to handle the trigger more calmly.


Me: BW
DDay: Oct 2010 + 6 weeks false R
2.5 (+?) year A with married coworker/my "friend"
1 great kid.
Reconciling and healing

Posts: 1732 | Registered: Nov 2010
painpaingoaway
♀ Member
Member # 27196
Default  Posted: 10:55 PM, February 14th (Tuesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bumping for a newbie


me BS female 56/him WS 59
Married 33 years
D-day July 09/he gave me his slut's STD
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk

Posts: 7057 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Coastal South
ThoughtIKnewYa
♀ Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 4:11 PM, February 15th (Wednesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hello, all!! After months of suffering from an unknown condition that we assumed was herpes because I was diagnosed with that two years ago... I got word today that I DO NOT have herpes. My HPV came back clear, too. So, I'm off to try to figure out what is wrong with my body.

I guess the most important thing I can say is to get thoroughly tested AND, if something isn't adding up, seek a second (or third) opinion.

I hope we all find our way to healing!! Take care!!


Posts: 11685 | Registered: Mar 2008
Alwaysknew
♀ Member
Member # 34808
Default  Posted: 4:42 AM, February 20th (Monday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

HPV+ (don't remember which one) had colposcopy (sp) and all paps have came back clear for the passed year.

Just completed treatment for BV.

This was all before I "knew" I still have to have blood testing done, but I was tested 6 months ago due to WH career. I think I am going on Wed/Thur and Ill be a mess waiting to get the labs in the mail. I kinda feel like telling the phlebotomist why Im there. I have white coat syndrom with blood draws and I don't want her thinking ill of me.


BW 32
WH 36


Posts: 199 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: United States
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