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Betrayed Spouse S.T. D. Support

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southsidecali posted 1/11/2012 13:23 PM

How the hell can you not stress when waiting for HPV testing in order to avoid an outbreak?

I am stressing and an emotional wreck.

I have no one to talk to about this because I am so ashamed and I haven't even gotten around to telling people the real reason why we split up a year ago.

painpaingoaway posted 1/11/2012 18:23 PM

skeerd, yes, some STD's can have an EXTREMELY foul odor!

southside, you can talk to us...

southsidecali posted 1/17/2012 23:21 PM

I go for my results tomorrow. I hope its something minor.

I tried to keep busy all week to not thing about it but now its THERE> I have to deal with it.

survivor65 posted 1/20/2012 04:56 AM

I had my first STD test done a few days after DDay.

Results..BV and HSV. The dr told me the BV was most likely not related to the A, as I had been on meds from 2 surgeries. However, the HSV was and was recent to within a month of my test. (had only been with him 1 time since cleared from surgeries--of course he had been with her 1 time a few days earlier ) No answer as to whether it was type 1 or 2, was too early. Only 'combined' test was positive. It was at 1.61

FF 3 months--2nd test done this week: came back totally negative. Dr thinks that 1st test was false positive/lab error. Will re-test in another 3 months. So when discrepancy in my tests came back...fWH went to a clinic to do anonymous STD testing the same day..should have results today/tomorrow from his. (he is in process of acquiring insurance so had to find anonymous one)

UPDATE***** fWH test came back negative across the board!

Called my dr back...confirmed ---I AM CLEAR!!!!!

[This message edited by survivor65 at 5:30 PM, January 20th (Friday)]

0115 posted 1/20/2012 23:37 PM

Great news Survivor!!! Enjoy the weekend

0115 posted 1/20/2012 23:47 PM

Anyone with HPV just itch like crazy sometimes? Comes and goes and is not yeast infection...ugh!!!

ThoughtIKnewYa posted 1/21/2012 21:41 PM

Just a little update: I went back to the medical university for a biopsy to see if they could grow the hsv in a lab and determine which meds it's resistant to, but there were no lesions. The doc said it looked like the latest meds (Famvir) worked and told me just to contact her if it happened again. After a month on the outbreak dosage of Famvir, I dropped down to the suppressive dose...

Three days later, it came back. I'm scared. Of course, it's the weekend and I can't talk to a doc, so I went back to the outbreak dose. I just pray that it doesn't get as bad this time. Headed back to the University, I suppose.

On the up side, she *said* there were no visible signs of HPV, but I'm still waiting on the pap results to confirm that.

Just K posted 1/22/2012 09:25 AM

I found out about the affair from my dr when I was there for my yearly checkup. He didn't tell me but when I came up positive it kind of put the peices together. This was my gyn that I'd been seeing for many years who very nicely asked if we needed to be checking for STDS. (I didn't know but suspicions made me say yes.)
I'm clear now, it was treatable, but I still feel dirty. Sometimes I 'm never going to feel clean again and it's all his fault.

forgivingnow posted 1/23/2012 09:13 AM

I am still wondering if anyone has dealt with the STD Molluscum? My husband has had several spots burned off, did anyone get this from their spouse, how long did the virus last?

painpaingoaway posted 2/2/2012 09:24 AM

I found out about the affair from my dr
Me too honey. Embarassing, isn't it?

cdnmommy posted 2/3/2012 19:22 PM

I am embarrassed to admit that I haven't been tested for STDs. I was so humiliated and fWH said he was clean. Well, he had lab work today for a suspected bladder infection and it came back negative,but the doctor thinks it might be chlamydia. I am beside myself. I have had 2 miscarriages in the last 6 months, and maybe this is why. I feel so incredibly stupid stupid stupid. Now I have to go to my doctor and ask for the whole range of tests. I wish I had been braver before and just done it.i feel like such a fool.

I was feeling so good today and now I just want to crawl in a hole and die for being such a fucking idiot!

painpaingoaway posted 2/3/2012 20:04 PM


I have had 2 miscarriages in the last 6 months, and maybe this is why

I am so sorry.
This is the very reason I tell ALL newbies to get tested...

There is simply NO WAY for any of us to know who is 'clean' and who isn't.

You are NOT stupid, just we all were, once. upon. a. time.

ThoughtIKnewYa posted 2/3/2012 20:22 PM


0115 posted 2/3/2012 20:33 PM


I hope everything turns out OK. So sorry about the miscarriages.


cdnmommy posted 2/4/2012 13:06 PM

After an agonizing night and some good talks, I am convinced that this doesn't change anything in terms of what I want and my commitment to R. However, it is a shock that this is coming up NOW and I feel responsible for being so embarrassed as to allow myself to skip that important step. I have an appointment with my doctor booked on Tuesday as a follow up to the last miscarriage, and I will ask for testing for everything then. I know they tested for chlamydia, syphilis, etc when I was pregnant with my son 4 years ago, so anything that comes up now is "new" (i.e. from the A.)

The things I am struggling with are my own guilt over not getting tested, as well as my worries that there is "more" than the LTA. I am trying to trust my gut, something I was poor at doing in the past, and my gut tells me there is no more but it is not always easy to put out of my mind.

It is possible, of course, that fWH's test will come back negative. The doctor mentioned that aside from a UTI it could be diabetes or possibly kidney stones, but didn't sound like he thought that was very likely. It doesn't change anything in terms of what I must do, which is get tested and insist that fWH get tested for everything else as well. It also doesn't change the anxiety I am experiencing now and will be until this gets answered. However, it would put my mind at ease if I couldn't tie the miscarriages back to this.

Thanks for being here, everyone.

Sapphire_blue posted 2/5/2012 16:12 PM

Just to clarify: you CAN get rested for HPV, it's new (I was tested 8/11) they test DNA from cells in your cervix & uterus.

cdnmommy posted 2/6/2012 20:10 PM

Good news for a change!

fWH's test results came back today and he was negative for what they tested for: chlamydia and mycoplasma genitalium. And his doctor sent in a req for the rest of his tests. I see my doctor tomorrow.

I apologized to fWH for how hard I was to deal with this weekend and he said "you have nothing to apologize for. You should never have been in this position to begin with."

He's right, of course, but I do wish I had been able to handle the trigger more calmly.

painpaingoaway posted 2/14/2012 22:55 PM

bumping for a newbie

ThoughtIKnewYa posted 2/15/2012 16:11 PM

Hello, all!! After months of suffering from an unknown condition that we assumed was herpes because I was diagnosed with that two years ago... I got word today that I DO NOT have herpes. My HPV came back clear, too. So, I'm off to try to figure out what is wrong with my body.

I guess the most important thing I can say is to get thoroughly tested AND, if something isn't adding up, seek a second (or third) opinion.

I hope we all find our way to healing!! Take care!!

Alwaysknew posted 2/20/2012 04:42 AM

HPV+ (don't remember which one) had colposcopy (sp) and all paps have came back clear for the passed year.

Just completed treatment for BV.

This was all before I "knew" I still have to have blood testing done, but I was tested 6 months ago due to WH career. I think I am going on Wed/Thur and Ill be a mess waiting to get the labs in the mail. I kinda feel like telling the phlebotomist why Im there. I have white coat syndrom with blood draws and I don't want her thinking ill of me.

Fathful123 posted 2/21/2012 08:32 AM

I got tested for everything the day after Dday. I had female Dr and told her exactly why I was in for testing. I made WH go twice for testing since he had unprotected sex with the ugly cow. All tests negative. Oh he said he didn't use protection because she said.....wait...she said she was separated from her H and hadn't had sex in 10 years! Except her H lives in the house with her. That's how they were busted.

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