Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: TryingToReform (45458)

Wayward Side Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: If You Love Two People...
girlsbird
♀ Member
Member # 30877
Default  Posted: 4:26 PM, April 2nd (Monday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Tearing...


D-Day 10/28/10..almost admission 7/10 Reconciled. I was the betrayed

Posts: 1203 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: arizona
Aubrie
♀ Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 10:27 PM, June 1st (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

shameless bump for a newbie

[This message edited by Aubrie84 at 10:28 PM, June 1st (Friday)]


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne


Posts: 6335 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
Lost333
♀ Member
Member # 35182
Default  Posted: 3:35 PM, June 2nd (Saturday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

loved this post then-love it now.


Me:29,WS/BS Him:27, BS/WS (DontTreadOnMe) His Dday 2/19/12. My Dday 9/29/12
Married: 2 yrs, together 4 1/2

"And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom" Anais Nin


Posts: 689 | Registered: Mar 2012 | From: Midwest
rollercoaster80
♀ Member
Member # 23412
Default  Posted: 4:32 PM, June 2nd (Saturday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks Aubrie for bumping this.

I did not see it the first time around.

Just recently started to read in Wayward and I am finding out that there are also some incredibly strong and beautiful people in this forum.

Thank you to all the waywards that "get it"


me 55 fbw
him 67 FWH/SA
married 32 years
together 31 years my whole adult life!
4 s, 1 stepd, 2 grand kids

multiple A's, 2 LTA's,multiple indescretions...before and throughout our marriage


Posts: 1047 | Registered: Mar 2009 | From: sarasota, fl
isadora
♀ Member
Member # 29130
Default  Posted: 9:09 PM, June 2nd (Saturday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I missed this post the first time around. thanks for the bump. Great post!


Me: BW Him: WH
Married: 12 yrs
2 DDs and DSs all under 10
2 Affairs - 2010 year long PA/EA, 2008 2 month online EA
Multiple D-Days

I can only control myself, no one else. I do not have that kind of power.


Posts: 4509 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: Back home again in Indiana
init4life
♂ New Member
Member # 35414
Default  Posted: 9:54 PM, June 2nd (Saturday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank aubrie......this is exactly how I feel about ow. Once you come out of the fog you see more clearly then ever.


WH (me)
BS (wife)
Married 15 years, together 18

Posts: 40 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: AZ
fraeuken
♀ Member
Member # 30742
Default  Posted: 11:05 PM, June 2nd (Saturday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

At a friend's party and could not stay off SI. In tears, sobbing in the bathroom.


Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1260 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
Sal1995
♂ Member
Member # 39099
Default  Posted: 12:37 PM, May 14th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

B.S. here, still new to S.I.

I'm not sure how I came across this old thread, or whether it's appropriate to bump something this old. But I showed it to my remorseful WW (an SI lurker), and she thought that Aubrie hit a home run with her analysis and really seems to "get it." Which is nice to hear, since it suggests that my WW "gets it" as well.

I think it deserves a second life.


Me (BS)-45, WW-43
DDay 2/17/13, 9-10 month PA/EA
M - 18 years, 4 children
Reconciling

Posts: 1463 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Texas
thecaves
♂ Member
Member # 38062
Default  Posted: 1:14 PM, May 14th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

We need a "like" button here...


Me: WH
Her: BW
Kids: Yes
Married: 20+
D-Day: 12/2012

What defines us is how well we rise after falling.


Posts: 173 | Registered: Jan 2013
LA44
♀ Member
Member # 38384
Default  Posted: 1:20 PM, May 14th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Definitely need the "like" key!

Thank you!


Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear

Posts: 2483 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Canada, eh
SoVerySadNow
♀ Member
Member # 36711
Default  Posted: 1:21 PM, May 14th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm glad it was bumped up. Thanks for the thoughts, Aubrie.


Me:BW
Him:WH
D-day(s),after years of TT and Gaslighting was Labor Day Weekend 2012, continuing for a week after. *Dammit! More TT 3/9/13
Really trending toward D- planning about it is my "happy place" now.

Posts: 1292 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Sunny Florida
MissesJai
♀ Member
Member # 24849
Default  Posted: 1:44 PM, May 14th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

awesome...


FWW - 41
"Don't think first about the risks of speaking up. Think first about the risks of not speaking up." ~ Kerry Patterson

Posts: 5989 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: So Cal.....
Hunter23
♀ Member
Member # 37574
Default  Posted: 2:23 PM, May 14th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Another BS here...

Thanks for bumping this - So well said!


Me: BW, 38
Him:WH, 40
DDay: Nov 3, 2012
Hoping to recover...

Posts: 99 | Registered: Nov 2012
TrustGone
♀ Member
Member # 36654
Default  Posted: 2:32 PM, May 14th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks Aubrie. When I first saw the title I started not to read it. I didn't want to read another post from a WS that didn't "get it". I am so glad to read that you really do and I hope that it influences others to "get it" as well.


BW-50
WH#2-51
M-9 yrs T-11 yrs
4 children-none together
DD#1-9/5/11 LTA 2yrs
DD#2-7/3/12 False R
DD#3-4/29/13 (OW broke NC)
Status: Your guess is as good as mine.

Posts: 2420 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Texas
pantsonfire106
♂ New Member
Member # 35748
Default  Posted: 2:50 PM, May 14th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I never post or reply.

But thanks for this.


Posts: 10 | Registered: Jun 2012
LovesLaboursLost
♀ Member
Member # 37272
Default  Posted: 2:51 PM, May 14th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I hate that saying too. Self indulgent bullshit...VOMIT! I like your rebuttal, Aubrie.


I'm a work in progress.

Posts: 81 | Registered: Oct 2012
Trying33
♀ Member
Member # 38815
Default  Posted: 11:10 PM, May 14th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Made me cry. Difference between love and lurrrve is spot on. The second leads into the former which is longlasting and real.

I think the tears are because of guilt and shame. Breaking the real love for the "love" that's shallow, fickle, fake and wrapped up with a bow.

Thank-you for posting/bumping this. More stuff like this is needed to put things in perspective (something fresh fww's are desparately in need of, mainly me)


Posts: 362 | Registered: Mar 2013
Aubrie
♀ Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 7:43 AM, May 15th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The second leads into the former which is longlasting and real.
Not if both parties are already married or attached to other people. You cannot convince me that luuuurv is real if two people are cheating on and destroying two families, in the name of "love". Everything about an affair is wrong. It sure feels like love. And I guess in way, it's a type of love. Just like when an abuser loves his wife and beats her. Doesn't mean it's healthy.

If you and AP are cheating on your spouses to be with one another, who's to say you and AP won't cheat on one another with a new AP once the newness and "love" of the relationship wear off. You are both still broken people. Broken attracts broken. History will repeat. Same story, difference faces.


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne


Posts: 6335 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
5454real
♂ Member
Member # 37455
Default  Posted: 8:06 AM, May 15th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

^^^^^This^^^^^


BH 51, WW 42
DS 23(Mine),SD 21,SS 20(Hers),DS 9 Ours, DGS 3, DGD 1 mo
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 10yrs
I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.
― Sophocles, Antigone

Posts: 3036 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
Undone1
♀ Member
Member # 37683
Default  Posted: 3:16 PM, May 17th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Great post. Sent to my fWH


Undone1
Married 10+ years to my high school sweetheart
DDAY 10/27/12
Me 55
WH 55
Blended Family: 25, 21, and 20
Married 10 years
"The Universe Unfolds as it Should"

Posts: 301 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: Missouri
Topic Posts: 61
Pages: 1 · 2 · 3 · 4

Return to Forum: Wayward Side Post Reply to this Topic
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.