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Newest Member: 4ever2gether (45763)

New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: t/j - dating - share your w.t.f. moments
k94ever
♀ Member
Member # 11176
Default  Posted: 1:58 PM, August 14th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm on OurTime. Got a "match" for a gentleman and I kid you not....his profile picture showed him holding up a pin-up calendar of naked women.

WTF..............


k9


BS: 56
WS: 53
Betrayed: 23 years
Affairs: 14 (2 lasted 3 months. Rest were ONS)
WS died: 16 May 2011
Do not stay in your hurt forever. Choose to move out of it.

Posts: 6614 | Registered: Jul 2006 | From: Wisconsin
EvenKeel
♀ Member
Member # 24210
Default  Posted: 1:58 PM, August 15th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

so we are going to see another movie at the drive-in called Flesh Gordon.

I learn so much here....who knew they had porn drive-ins?


Eyes are useless if the mind is blind.


Posts: 2249 | Registered: May 2009 | From: Pa
Forged1
♂ Member
Member # 43418
Default  Posted: 2:08 PM, August 15th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No male or female jail skanks have hit on me or any of my colleaguues today, hence no funny 'Forged Goes to County' stories.

Sorry.


Me: BH - 30s
Her: WW - 30s

Married - 2008
PA with boss for at least 5 months in 2013, possibly longer.
DDay - Feb 2014
Separated, heading to D
==================================
At this stage, I'm pretty much bulletproof.


Posts: 307 | Registered: May 2014 | From: USA
k94ever
♀ Member
Member # 11176
Default  Posted: 5:36 PM, August 15th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How depressing Forged....................


k9


BS: 56
WS: 53
Betrayed: 23 years
Affairs: 14 (2 lasted 3 months. Rest were ONS)
WS died: 16 May 2011
Do not stay in your hurt forever. Choose to move out of it.

Posts: 6614 | Registered: Jul 2006 | From: Wisconsin
cantaccept
♀ Member
Member # 37451
Default  Posted: 5:59 PM, August 15th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Holy Crap!!! Apparently I have led a very sheltered life!!!

Don't think I will try the OLD thing. OMG!

Very funny reading though.


"So often times it happens, that we live our lives in chains and we never even know we have the key"

I would now like to be known as Can!

dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh boots5050
attempted R, it was all a lie

Divorced!


Posts: 1481 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Connecticut
Forged1
♂ Member
Member # 43418
Default  Posted: 7:39 PM, August 15th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

K9,

I'll tell 'em on Monday that they're letting the side down.

SI expects, ladies and gentlemen. Here we are now - entertain us.

F.


Me: BH - 30s
Her: WW - 30s

Married - 2008
PA with boss for at least 5 months in 2013, possibly longer.
DDay - Feb 2014
Separated, heading to D
==================================
At this stage, I'm pretty much bulletproof.


Posts: 307 | Registered: May 2014 | From: USA
risingfromashes
♀ Member
Member # 3903
Default  Posted: 8:08 PM, August 15th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am going to paraphrase because I deleted and blocked this guy as soon as I read the message. Some details are forever etched in my memory.

His name was Harlyman. That was the spelling.

I like to ride my Harly. I live near a lake. I like to bbq and swim in the lake. I live near a casino. I love it and you.

I love it and you! Baby you had me there with that line!


There is a wonderful life on the other side of hell.

Posts: 1714 | Registered: Mar 2004
Pass
♂ Member
Member # 38122
Default  Posted: 9:21 AM, August 16th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I recently posted this story in a thread entitled "I attract freaks":

A couple weeks ago, I asked out a very cute neighbour for coffee that night. She said she couldn't do that, but could do the next night instead. I said great, and we made a plan. Then she texted me and asked if I wanted to meet her at a bar not far from here, on the night that she had said she was busy. I didn't like the fact that I was running out at her call, but thought it best to not assume that all women are like The Princess. So I went anyhow.

We sat and had a couple beers. I don't want to be unkind, but she was really not very smart. It was like talking to one of the girls I knew in high school. I would ask a question, she would speak a few sentences, and then end with, "But whatever ... right ... it is what it is." That was her answer for EVERYTHING.

As we were getting ready to leave, she asked if I still wanted to go out the next night, as we had planned. I said, "I'm still up for it if you are" (god knows why), and she agreed.

I sent the "text of reassurance" the next morning saying I'd had a good time. As lunch approached, I received a text from her asking if I could meet for lunch.

I didn't know if this was her being needy, or trying to establish that I should be at her beck and call, but I decided to set a boundary: "Sorry, I can't make it for lunch."

Her response: "Whatever. Then I don't want to meet tonight."

I responded with my favourite one-word breakup for whenever crazy rears it's ugly head: "Cool."

[This message edited by Pass at 3:24 PM, August 16th, 2014 (Saturday)]


Loyal spouse: Me; Disloyal spouse: The Princess
Two sons: Now 11 and 14
DDay: Nov 15, 2012
Separated: Mar 2, 2013 after 17 year marriage, now divorcing!

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous


Posts: 2157 | Registered: Jan 2013
cantaccept
♀ Member
Member # 37451
Default  Posted: 9:45 AM, August 16th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Pass,

There is such a thing as the "text of reassurance" ???

I think I have a lot to learn!

I do like your standard response, "cool", I am going to remember that one.


"So often times it happens, that we live our lives in chains and we never even know we have the key"

I would now like to be known as Can!

dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh boots5050
attempted R, it was all a lie

Divorced!


Posts: 1481 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Connecticut
Pass
♂ Member
Member # 38122
Default  Posted: 3:28 PM, August 16th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The Text of Reassurance: Absolutely! You have to send a text the next day - before noon - reassuring that you had a good time, and are looking forward to the next time. This is what I've learned.

Since adopting the Text of Reassurance policy, I've received WAY fewer miffed lunchtime texts. Get your head in the game, Can!

And yes, when in doubt, "Cool" is the best response to almost everything.


Loyal spouse: Me; Disloyal spouse: The Princess
Two sons: Now 11 and 14
DDay: Nov 15, 2012
Separated: Mar 2, 2013 after 17 year marriage, now divorcing!

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous


Posts: 2157 | Registered: Jan 2013
cantaccept
♀ Member
Member # 37451
Default  Posted: 7:25 PM, August 17th (Sunday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Lol!!! I got the "text of reassurance", yes before noon.

I will have to use you as my guide to dating etiquette! Lol... this is just...surreal???


"So often times it happens, that we live our lives in chains and we never even know we have the key"

I would now like to be known as Can!

dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh boots5050
attempted R, it was all a lie

Divorced!


Posts: 1481 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Connecticut
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 1:15 AM, August 18th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The Text of Reassurance: Absolutely! You have to send a text the next day - before noon - reassuring that you had a good time, and are looking forward to the next time. This is what I've learned.

@Pass, Only IF you had a good time and are looking forward to next time. Don't be leading the ladies on just to be polite. Bloody Canadians.


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5660 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Pass
♂ Member
Member # 38122
Default  Posted: 8:14 AM, August 18th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ha! And I suppose the Ozzie way is to somehow send a virtual kick to the ovaries if I had a lousy time?


Loyal spouse: Me; Disloyal spouse: The Princess
Two sons: Now 11 and 14
DDay: Nov 15, 2012
Separated: Mar 2, 2013 after 17 year marriage, now divorcing!

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous


Posts: 2157 | Registered: Jan 2013
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 8:55 AM, August 18th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Somewhere between almost a proposal and a kick in the ovaries is the sweet spot you're looking for.

Aussies don't do this dating etiquette thing I don't think. We keep it simple. Contact if we're interested. Don't contact if we're not.

You are absolutely right about before noon though. I try to beat them to it when I'm not interested. It's easier for everyone if the friend zone discussion is had BEFORE someone sends an "I'd love to see you again" missive.

"Thanks for a fun night. I think we can agree there were no romantic sparks between us but [insert genuine compliment]."

^this move is a bit harder to execute if you've already slept with them. So try not to do that.


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5660 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Forged1
♂ Member
Member # 43418
Default  Posted: 1:36 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Excerpt from a letter I've just received from an incarcerated client:

I think about you often when I close my eyes. I can still see you in that blue shirt. Like Campbells Soup. Mmmmmm........good.

ETA -

[This message edited by Forged1 at 1:37 PM, August 19th (Tuesday)]


Me: BH - 30s
Her: WW - 30s

Married - 2008
PA with boss for at least 5 months in 2013, possibly longer.
DDay - Feb 2014
Separated, heading to D
==================================
At this stage, I'm pretty much bulletproof.


Posts: 307 | Registered: May 2014 | From: USA
k94ever
♀ Member
Member # 11176
Default  Posted: 3:54 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Thanks Forged!!!!!!


k9


BS: 56
WS: 53
Betrayed: 23 years
Affairs: 14 (2 lasted 3 months. Rest were ONS)
WS died: 16 May 2011
Do not stay in your hurt forever. Choose to move out of it.

Posts: 6614 | Registered: Jul 2006 | From: Wisconsin
Forged1
♂ Member
Member # 43418
Default  Posted: 4:33 PM, August 19th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The rest of the letter is basically a 'please please please can you call my boyfriend and my baby daddy and my mom and my other boyfriend to see if they'll but up the bail money for me'.

She only wants me for my ability to make phonecalls. Man, I thought we could have had something together.

I feel all hurt and shit.


Me: BH - 30s
Her: WW - 30s

Married - 2008
PA with boss for at least 5 months in 2013, possibly longer.
DDay - Feb 2014
Separated, heading to D
==================================
At this stage, I'm pretty much bulletproof.


Posts: 307 | Registered: May 2014 | From: USA
FeelingMN
♂ Member
Member # 32240
Default  Posted: 2:10 PM, August 20th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Cool


Me 41
fWW 37
DD(19), DS(17), DD(11) (Mine, hers, ours)
Together 14y, Married 12
DDay Aug 2010, 4 mos TT & gaslighting
ONS + EA after 15yr Class reunion out of state

Posts: 267 | Registered: May 2011 | From: Minnesota
cayc
♀ Member
Member # 21964
Default  Posted: 2:32 PM, August 20th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Recently I read this article about a guy who works with prisoners from a rehabilitation perspective. As part of that, he'd set up this online website so the prisoners could host profiles for pen pals. The idea was his company posted the profiles, and notified the prisoners if someone wanted to be a pen pal, and then the communication would occur via snail mail it's not that he had obtained internet access for these folks.

So for grins, I went and looked. OMG. If you hadn't told me it was prisoners posting these profiles (and the crime they were convicted of was listed, along with their time served/release date) you would think you were on match.com. The profiles read EXACTLY the same way. And the pics were pretty much the same too. There were a few that actually mentioned why they were incarcerated and their shame about it, but most didn't. They were mark shopping. Ugh. It made me think twice about OLD!


"I'm not afraid of storms, for I'm learning how to sail my ship." - Louisa May Alcott

Posts: 3160 | Registered: Dec 2008 | From: Mexico
Forged1
♂ Member
Member # 43418
Default  Posted: 3:11 PM, August 20th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

cayc, I'm pretty sure that I know the site you're talking about, or at least that sounds very like it.

We had a client a few years back (a really lonely guy) who began corresponding with a female inmate from that site. They wrote back and forth to each other for about three years. He used to send her money for her commissary, small gifts and so on. Once she was released, she pretty much showed up on his doorstep and moved in. It didn't end well for him.

He ended up with multiple felony convictions for check fraud and obtaining by false pretenses and that was after she'd got him to withdraw every cent he had from his savings and a retirement fund. There was also some jail time - a year or eighteen months. It was a while ago.

Anyway. she was also prosecuted, and the new charges plus whatever suspended time she already had saw her going away for the best part of seven or eight years.

Somehow, I don't think they renewed their correspondence.


Me: BH - 30s
Her: WW - 30s

Married - 2008
PA with boss for at least 5 months in 2013, possibly longer.
DDay - Feb 2014
Separated, heading to D
==================================
At this stage, I'm pretty much bulletproof.


Posts: 307 | Registered: May 2014 | From: USA
Topic Posts: 241
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