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User
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Topic: How do I let a guy know I'm interested?
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nutmegkitty
♀ Member
Member # 33882 |  Posted: 2:35 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 |     |
An IT guy came into my office on Monday and holy crap did I have a reaction. He just blew me away. I find him very attractive, he's kind of geeky, but hey, so am I) and soft spoken and well, I could gush for hours.
I did some reconnaissance work with the help of very credible people and found that he is not married, nor is he dating anyone. He doesn't wear a wedding ring but you never know.
I found him on FB and Linked In too. Remember how, when I went to parenting class there was a guy I knew? Well IT Guy is FB friends with Parenting Class guy. Small world!!!
Anyway, I have not been able to get him out of my mind. My question is, how do I let him know I'd be interested in getting to know him? I have been making eye contact when I see him. I share my office with my boss and another co-worker, so I can't be obviously flirty if he should come to the office for something IT related.
What would you do? Friend request him on FB? Send him an email? Roam the halls of my office building hoping to randomly run into him?
I could certainly start having a lot of computer problems  and ask that the tickets be assigned to him.
Help a girl out here!
me (BS)
him (NPD Ex)
2 dds
DDay 10/7/11
OW
OC
Divorced 1/17/2013
"Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend, freedom is."
Posts: 2039 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: here |
Maxiom
♂ Member
Member # 26001 | | Posted: 2:47 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 | |
Here is a crazy idea.
You have the means to contact him.. Ask him out.
Me: FBS/WS 41
Her FWS/BS 41
My DDay - March 10, 2007 Whole Truth - May 2007
Her DDay - March 2, 2011
True NC March 3, 2011
Posts: 401 | Registered: Oct 2009 | From: Canada |
nutmegkitty
♀ Member
Member # 33882 | | Posted: 2:49 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 | |
Like, just an out of the blue email or FB message? Saying maybe do you want to grab a drink after work?
me (BS)
him (NPD Ex)
2 dds
DDay 10/7/11
OW
OC
Divorced 1/17/2013
"Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend, freedom is."
Posts: 2039 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: here |
jennie160
♀ Member
Member # 29949 | | Posted: 2:52 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 | |
I could certainly start having a lot of computer problems and ask that the tickets be assigned to him.
This is how my mom got my dad. It was way back in the days of typewriters. She worked at a bank and hers had broken. My dad was the one who came out to fix it. She started intentionally breaking her typewriter so he would have to come back and fix it. Finally he asked her out.
I wouldn't FB friend him, that might be alittle bit weird how you found his page. But you could always send him an email. Maybe start out just with an email about an IT issue and see if you can carry the conversation on.
Posts: 830 | Registered: Oct 2010 |
Maxiom
♂ Member
Member # 26001 | | Posted: 3:16 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 | |
Like, just an out of the blue email or FB message? Saying maybe do you want to grab a drink after work?
Well yeah. Exactly like that.
Is there still some unwritten rule that the guy always has the burden of asking?
Me: FBS/WS 41
Her FWS/BS 41
My DDay - March 10, 2007 Whole Truth - May 2007
Her DDay - March 2, 2011
True NC March 3, 2011
Posts: 401 | Registered: Oct 2009 | From: Canada |
nutmegkitty
♀ Member
Member # 33882 | | Posted: 3:18 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 | |
No, the guy isn't obligated to ask first.
This will take a lot of courage.
me (BS)
him (NPD Ex)
2 dds
DDay 10/7/11
OW
OC
Divorced 1/17/2013
"Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend, freedom is."
Posts: 2039 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: here |
Amazonia
♀ Member
Member # 32810 | | Posted: 3:25 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 | |
I agree with asking him out. Either in person (if you can get him alone) or through FB. If his profile wasn't hard to find, then it's not creepy to ask him out that way. But if it took more than basic search on the facebook toolbar, you might want to focus on in person.
"No girl who plays the role of the hero dates a guy who uses her. She knows who she is; she just forgot for a little while." -my awesome pastor | I edit to correct my iPad's "corrections"
Posts: 11206 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: Washington, DC |
Maxiom
♂ Member
Member # 26001 | | Posted: 3:29 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 | |
This will take a lot of courage
Welcome to our world. :P
~20years ago I had a woman I barely knew hand me a coffee and asked me to join her for an late afternoon walk on the waterfront. Once the initial shock wore off I was all in.
Me: FBS/WS 41
Her FWS/BS 41
My DDay - March 10, 2007 Whole Truth - May 2007
Her DDay - March 2, 2011
True NC March 3, 2011
Posts: 401 | Registered: Oct 2009 | From: Canada |
nutmegkitty
♀ Member
Member # 33882 | | Posted: 3:30 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 | |
No, his name was the first that popped up when I searched.
And, point taken Maxiom. 
me (BS)
him (NPD Ex)
2 dds
DDay 10/7/11
OW
OC
Divorced 1/17/2013
"Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend, freedom is."
Posts: 2039 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: here |
gahurts
♂ Member
Member # 33699 | | Posted: 5:36 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 | |
Ask him to go down to the cafeteria and get a Coke with you. Then just chat and have a conversation. Worked for me. 
"Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indominable will"
- Mahatma Gandi
Posts: 1759 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Georgia |
Jpapageorge
♂ Member
Member # 31800 | | Posted: 7:30 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 | |
FB request with a note: "Hey IT guy, I just got a friend suggestion because you are friends with Parenting Class Guy. It's kinda funny after just seeing you in the office."
"Either get busy livin' or get busy dyin'." (and I prefer to live)
"Shame on me for kissing you with my eyes closed."
Me: FBBF
Posts: 1360 | Registered: Apr 2011 | From: California |
Amazonia
♀ Member
Member # 32810 | | Posted: 7:32 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 | |
I was going to suggest either what jpapa said (you can totally fake a friend suggestion!) or else something like, "Hey ITGuy! I hope it's not too creepy that I found you on facebook, but you seem cool and I love getting to know new people. I wondered if you'd be interested in grabbing a drink or a cup of coffee sometime." - which is pretty much exactly what I would personally send.
"No girl who plays the role of the hero dates a guy who uses her. She knows who she is; she just forgot for a little while." -my awesome pastor | I edit to correct my iPad's "corrections"
Posts: 11206 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: Washington, DC |
nutmegkitty
♀ Member
Member # 33882 | | Posted: 7:51 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 | |
AMA and J, that is so freaking perfect. Thank you for the input!
me (BS)
him (NPD Ex)
2 dds
DDay 10/7/11
OW
OC
Divorced 1/17/2013
"Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend, freedom is."
Posts: 2039 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: here |
Amazonia
♀ Member
Member # 32810 | | Posted: 8:01 PM, July 26th (Thursday), 2012 | |
Just keep us updated, mmmkay? 
"No girl who plays the role of the hero dates a guy who uses her. She knows who she is; she just forgot for a little while." -my awesome pastor | I edit to correct my iPad's "corrections"
Posts: 11206 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: Washington, DC |
spareparts
♂ Member
Member # 33434 | | Posted: 1:54 PM, July 27th (Friday), 2012 | |
Aside from all the excellent suggestions you have received I wanted to offer you some advice from the other side of the line.
Being an IT guy, manning the helpdesk and being sole support at times some of the young ladies would have requests for "silly" problems. None of the computers would work because someone had turned the plug socket off!
Then you just say "oh IT guy fixed it for me the other day can you just send him down i'm sure it would be quicker". Then just thank him for his help, and tell him you owe him a drink for helping you out and take it from there.
*cough* well thats what worked on me anyway....
Posts: 503 | Registered: Sep 2011 |
nutmegkitty
♀ Member
Member # 33882 | | Posted: 1:59 PM, July 27th (Friday), 2012 | |
I really appreciate the input SP!
I am so freaking worked up over this that I'm even irritated at myself.  Good lord!
I am doing the friend request thing at 4:30. I need time to work up the courage
me (BS)
him (NPD Ex)
2 dds
DDay 10/7/11
OW
OC
Divorced 1/17/2013
"Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend, freedom is."
Posts: 2039 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: here |
wildbananas
♀ Member
Member # 10552 | | Posted: 2:02 PM, July 27th (Friday), 2012 | |
spareparts, I'm also in IT and I was going to suggest the very same thing.
Seriously, we hear a lot of bitching day in and day out. Appreciation and an offer of a soda would be welcomed... especially from a nice girl like yourself.
Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan
Posts: 14684 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Just a Cali girl |
painpaingoaway
♀ Member
Member # 27196 | | Posted: 2:16 PM, July 27th (Friday), 2012 | |
Well, here's a suggestion from an old lady from the dark ages of typewriters and teletype.
35 yrs ago I had a similar 'OMG, I'm in love' reaction to H when I first met him at work. I batted eyelashes for awhile, pretended to 'need help' with various things at work, and after several weeks and he didn't ask me out, I just walked up to him and said, "hey suga, are you ever going to ask me out"? He looked like he was going to faint!
me BS female 54/him WS 57
Married 32 years
D-day July 09/he gave me his slut's STD
watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land"
Episode # 1
http://www.xtranormal.com/watch/12278468/playgoz
Posts: 5906 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Coastal South |
nutmegkitty
♀ Member
Member # 33882 | | Posted: 2:28 PM, July 27th (Friday), 2012 | |
HA HA HA HA!!! Love the stories!
me (BS)
him (NPD Ex)
2 dds
DDay 10/7/11
OW
OC
Divorced 1/17/2013
"Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend, freedom is."
Posts: 2039 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: here |
persevere
♀ Member
Member # 31468 | | Posted: 3:01 PM, July 27th (Friday), 2012 | |
I am watching and learning nutmeg! 
Me: BW-42
Him: XWH-42
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11
Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling
Posts: 3210 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas |
| Topic Posts: 66 | |
