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Newest Member: asherssoul (45716)

Wayward Side Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Affair Confessions - Everything to learn in 1 Post
♂ New Member
Member # 41576
Default  Posted: 12:22 PM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

@suspended, out of all of your posts, this is the most disturbing. Particularly "would I ever recommend."

You have absolutely no business giving advice to anyone on this forum. Your arrogance fails to mask your insecurity and the only advice you should be giving is how to get HPV (sorry, I meant educated and classy HPV).

You know what is funny is statistically 75% of the people posting here have/had HPV at one point in there life. With over 100 strains with about 30% of those being the once that may aid in cancers.

We can disagree all day long. Of course I'm insecure who isn't? Who doesn't feel inadequate in at least something?

Do you not ever feel insecure? If not, that's awesome kudos to you!!

I read all of the responses and unfortunately no one has a real good answer as to why confession is better.

I see a lot of attacks on character, principle, or passing judgement. The facts are still the same.

I'm sitting right here right now at work! My life is great if my wife calls me and says "Honey, I can't hold in it anymore. I'm so sorry I've been sleeping with your boss. I was just so scared you would find out!!"

While noble trust me my life doesn't get better at that point. People are just afraid of being taken as the fool that's all it is.

I know it's a slippery slope and I do understand the principle point, the right/wrong, the vows made, the disrespect, the falsehood, etc etc that's not the question.

Does it make the marriage better/happier? No, it doesn't! I strongly suggest anyone who had a affair and it's hidden. Squash it, kill it, and move on focus on your spouse/family and forget it ever happened.

As for the

Like a cancer
comment. Stop projecting a affair is cancer, but porn everyday isn't?

If your spouse changed his actions well he/she obviously screwed up. Remember as psychotherapist say once discovery occurs often both parties rewrite history to make sense of it all. From the WS being miserable with the marriage to the BS saying "See I knew it" when in fact both are embellishing a little bit.

Posts: 26 | Registered: Dec 2013
♀ Member
Member # 36033
Default  Posted: 12:37 PM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Please stop posting on my thread Suspended. You have a negative energy and I'm not impressed. No one is. No one cares about your success. Frankly my dear we don't give a damn. You could be millionaire for all we know but you can keep your empty soul to yourself. Go post on your own thread that you have abandoned

WW/BW 33 BH/WH 34
Both in IC/MC. Finally in R.
1 year old beautiful daughter

Posts: 884 | Registered: Jul 2012
Deeply Scared
♀ Administrator
Member # 2
Red  Posted: 12:52 PM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Please stay off other threads for now, you're only instigating things on purpose.

You have an active thread of your own, please post there.

Thank you.

"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.

Posts: 198800 | Registered: May 2002
♀ Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 3:32 PM, April 21st (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bump for HorribleGF.

Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

Posts: 6426 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
♀ Member
Member # 43178
Default  Posted: 5:16 PM, April 21st (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you so much for making this post. I was on the edge about telling my BS, and I didn't know how to go about it if I did decide to tell. But this post has definitely given me some insight and helped me to make the right choice. So again, thank you.

Me: 20
BBF: 22
Dday: 28/04/14
Years together: 3.5

Posts: 51 | Registered: Apr 2014
♀ Member
Member # 42957
Default  Posted: 10:33 AM, April 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Affairs thrive in secrecy

Exactly. When I finally confessed my LTA to Dh and our families, one of the first questions everyone asked was "but HOW did it go on for so long?" I've asked myself the same thing so many times and I've concluded that it was because I didn't confess. AP and I ended it after the first encounter and then at least 50 times after that. I had 2 different therapists and a good friend tell me so many times over the years that it was wrong to tell- and honestly it's what I wanted to hear because I was selfish and didn't want to blow up my life. But the problem is that secret was a huge wall between me and BH, the secret kept me connected to AP. As long at we were keeping our little secret, the affair was alive.

Reconciling after confessing LTA

Posts: 84 | Registered: Mar 2014
♀ Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 7:03 PM, July 3rd (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

Posts: 6426 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
♀ Member
Member # 40637
Default  Posted: 8:38 PM, July 7th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This is a great post she-ra!

Haha! The jokes on me, another DDay November 20, 2014! A date that will live in infamy, along with July 8,2013, oh yea and 36.5 years ago right after we got married. Hat trick!! WH is tremblingaspen. Life sucks.

Posts: 176 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: USA
♀ Member
Member # 39682
Default  Posted: 7:40 PM, July 22nd (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bump for new member (hope this is ok).

Me-BS Him-WH DS 5/12
Met 2000, Married 2004
DDay 5/26/13, TT through 8/13
2.5 yr EA w/co-worker, PA 12/12 to 4/13
Hopeful for R

Posts: 875 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: MA
Topic Posts: 69
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