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Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: I miss her...
♀ Member
Member # 32309
Default  Posted: 2:33 PM, February 13th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

3 years on from D day and in recovery for most of it but I still feel sadness at my lost life every day. I just deal with the new one and hope that the plaster sticks hard

Me: BW 53
Him: FWH 47
4 wonderful grown children
2 beautiful grandchildren
Married 20 years
Together 23 years
Dday March 10 2010. 4 yr A.
Me: RGN(ret), N.Dip.,BA(Psych),MA (Psych),BA Music.
OW: 55 year old taxi driver

Posts: 333 | Registered: May 2011 | From: UK
♂ Member
Member # 38047
Default  Posted: 9:58 AM, February 14th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Very well said. I feel EXACTLY the same way. I have expressed this to her and what I get back is "sorry".
reflex response I think.........

I share your pain (((Y)))

[This message edited by devotedfool68 at 9:58 AM, February 14th (Thursday)]

BH 46
WW 38 (Lost94)
DS 17
DS 15
AP - friend of a friend of WW - complete stranger, predatory KISA

many DDays, primary 7/4/2012 and 8/10/2012
timeline of the highlights 11/1/2013

Holding on to hope.

Posts: 240 | Registered: Jan 2013
♂ Member
Member # 38230
Default  Posted: 1:40 PM, April 13th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bump. Because I still miss her. And love her so much more.

Me: BH
Her: WW Mrs.yaka
Variouse clues to EA. WW promised it would stop.
D-Day of EA 9/13/2012 2:01PM found 2 yrs of text messages, confessed to EA
D-Day of PA: confessed on 9/22/12 11:53 PM. Worst moment of my life

Posts: 222 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Massachusetts
♀ Member
Member # 38134
Default  Posted: 12:27 AM, April 14th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't love my wh the same way anymore. It is a source of sadness for me. Sometimes I even question why I am still trying to R. I miss the lost trust and respect. I don't know if the level of trust and respect before the A will ever return.

It's been a hard day today.. exactly 3 months since 1st dday.

Me-BW 46 yo;Him - WH 53 yo
Married 13years
One daughter together 9yo, 2 stepchildren(His from previous marriage)
Various DDdays (see my profile)
ONS and multiple "friendships" with women in various online dating sites

Posts: 131 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: New Zealand
♂ Member
Member # 37455
Default  Posted: 12:49 AM, April 14th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I miss what I thought I had. I miss the person who I knew 'soul deep' that I could trust with anything. That trust, once so freely given is gone. Not saying it can't be rebuilt, but this time it will be earned. This time around, no matter how far we get down the R road will always have the 'yea but', built in.

God, I miss the innocence.

BH 51, WW 42
DS 23(Mine),SD 21,SS 20(Hers),DS 9 Ours, DGS 3, DGD 1 mo
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 10yrs
I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.
― Sophocles, Antigone

Posts: 2995 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
♀ Member
Member # 28376
Default  Posted: 12:55 AM, April 14th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am sorry for your pain. What I can say that it is possible. My sister and her husband went through this 24 years ago. He got the OW pregnant but she miscarried. They are still together and love each other all the more.

Hang in there....this is a long road.

Me: 44/WH (SA): 49
M: 24 years 3 kids over 10 yrs old
EA/ PA Dec. 2009 -Divorce pending

Posts: 1240 | Registered: Apr 2010 | From: Midwest
♀ New Member
Member # 39056
Default  Posted: 9:13 AM, April 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I know it's been a long time since this post was active but I had to read it, I read all the posts twice. Cried and cried and cried my heart out

I miss the way I was loved, the way I felt special. I'm the wife, not anyone else. I'm his, he's mine. I miss not having to worry or watch him, I miss not feeling the pain all the time.

The innocence is gone. I wonder if he feels the pains I'm suffering. This really hurts but I miss the old him and the old me

BW 27
WH 33
Real Dday: May 22nd, 2013

Posts: 49 | Registered: Apr 2013
♀ Member
Member # 38805
Default  Posted: 9:24 AM, April 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Can relate to this. Feeling this hard today and wondering if I should even stay in my marriage because of it. My heart is broken.

Posts: 308 | Registered: Mar 2013
♀ Member
Member # 34918
Default  Posted: 10:03 AM, April 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It's hard. I love my FWH, but I can't help questioning his every move, his motives, holding back from him because I'm afraid he will use something against me at a later day. We are R'ing really successfully, but there are still the doubts and worries dancing in the back of my mind. Some days are better than others for me... but I fear that no matter how great things are, those doubts and worries will always be there.

BW (me):30
WH (guiltfilled11): 31
together 11 years, married 5 years
DDay: July 6th 2011
False R: beginning of August
True R until DDay 06/20 - talking to another girl and lying about it
Kids: DD 7, DS 4, DD 3

On the fence... do I stay or do

Posts: 183 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: NY
♀ Member
Member # 38805
Default  Posted: 10:04 AM, April 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't feel I am special, that our marriage is special, or that he is special anymore. I hate this feeling.

Posts: 308 | Registered: Mar 2013
Topic Posts: 30
Pages: 1 · 2

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