SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

That even though this incredibly hurtful and destructive event happened to my family, we are on our path to healing and adapting. That my kids are hurting, yet we are much closer than ever before and they know they can count on me forever more. That I have been able to identify (by reading SI and IC) some of my behavior that is not conducive to healthy relationships and I can make myself better for me and whatever life throws my way. That everyday is a new opportunity and I shouldn't waste it. That there are people out there (like the SI community) that are loving, decent and generous and are willing to help others, and believe me I've had really dark periods since the discovery. You have been lifesavers. That I am ready for the New Beginning that will come for my family and no longer wish to wallow on shoulda, coulda and woulda. That is just fantasy. But my reality, although hard and painful, has brought many joys as well. And even though it has been recent, I am deeply committed to not look back. To focus on what's important, my family and our future. And it feels good to know that only I can take that power away from myself.

Great post pp It's an important realization, and it just gets better from there. It's a good feeling.

I pray I can get to this point. Right now all I do is cry.

Happy for you though!! :)

You and your kids are going to be okay. I'm so glad that you're doing well.

Very good realization. Print it out so you can refer to it when you're on a down of the roller coaster!

I'm sure more dark periods to come, but I'm also sure that 10 years down the road, you will be so happy and you will think that everything you went through was worth it to become the person that you are.

Thank you all for the supportive words, you guys are amazing.

I pray I can get to this point. Right now all I do is cry.

@purplebluebella - I cried everyday for a month, hours and hours of it till I could cry no more. But then I realized that fuckface was living it up happy and partying, while I wasted time, youth, mental and physical health and opportunity grieving something that wasn't there. So I'm done doing that, wasting precious commodities; those things are valuable to me. I know that dark times may arise, but again, I'm determined to not look back, but forward. Hope that everything works out for the best and many hugs to you.

I made a conscious decision to surrender, to reach a place of acceptance. It stopped the "what ifs" that were torturing me. I needed to sit in that hole for a while to mourn and regain my strength.

I can almost feel my healing physically if that makes sense. Like a shedding of old skin for new.

And it is glorious.

Lovely post pp.