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User Topic: Blah, I need a hug
purplejacket4
♀ Member
Member # 34262
Default  Posted: 12:45 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

As Medical Director of a Division I school I have to deal with many college students in deep distress. We have a committee that deals with these students and I get to be the doctor that takes care of the majority of them. So while my coworkers are taking care of colds and urinary tract infections I'm hearing the absolute most depressing stories of depression, anxiety, loss, betrayal, etc., etc. After awhile it starts to really get to you. I was trained to do SOME mental health not ALL mental health. I guess I'm just feeling tired and drained.

I cannot talk to fWS about it right now because she is taking her boards on Friday and is beyond panicked. The medical boards are only taken once every TEN years so when something is that infrequent it really builds up to being this horrible thing. She is actually home from work trying to study/ take care of her increasing panic attacks.

I cannot discuss with my parents. Besides HIPAA obviously they just don't get it. Neither are in the medical or mental health field.

So YOU get to be my sounding board today! Isn't that great!! So come on SI buds, give the girl a hug!!


Me: BS 45
Her: fWS 48 (same sex partner)
Together: 18 years now (both MDs)
OW: meh so what 40s PhD
DD1: 10/30/11EA; DD2: 11/10/11 Had ONS; TT until 12/26/11; broke NC 6/12; NC again 7/12; R-ish

Posts: 2247 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: Great Southwest
Amazonia
♀ Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 1:11 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((pj)))

Lots of energy and positive mojo for you today.


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13802 | Registered: Jul 2011
Newlease
♀ Member
Member # 7767
Default  Posted: 1:12 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I understand - it must be very draining. If you have empathy for these people, it can leave some physic residue on you after hearing so much of it.

What can you do to take care of yourself? A massage? A couple of hours to yourself? A warm bath and a glass of wine?

Just do a little self care and let it all go.

(((pj4)))

Sending strength and peace.

NL


Even if you can't control the world around you, you are still the master of your own soul.

Posts: 7744 | Registered: Aug 2005
bbee
♀ Member
Member # 17840
Default  Posted: 1:16 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Do you have time for some IC for yourself? (((pj)))

Also, mojo to fWS!


This above all: to thine ownself be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Hamlet, Act I, Scene 3

Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.

All's Well That Ends Well, Act I, Scene 1


Posts: 6656 | Registered: Jan 2008 | From: SE US
silverhopes
♀ Member
Member # 32753
Default  Posted: 1:26 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((purplejacket)))

Like newlease said, how can you take care of yourself today? I know those students must appreciate you being there for them.


Find peace. Or sleep on it.
Sometimes my monkeys, sometimes my circus.
Infidelities are like icebergs - they may take many different shapes and sizes, but they all damage your ship.

Posts: 3905 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: California
ajsmom
♀ Member
Member # 17460
Default  Posted: 1:29 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Here you go:

(((((((((pj4)))))))))

I had three kids in college at one time. I can only imagine what you've been through.

Thank you for all you do for these folks!

AJ's MOM


Fidelity isn't a feeling...it's a choice.

"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
____________________________________________
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
DS - 31 - Yikes!


Posts: 21072 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: Been Through Hell...On My Way Back
tryingagain74
♀ Member
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 1:52 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for all that you do, pj4. One of the nicest things that helped to get me through DDay and the ensuing aftermath was when my OB/GYN kindly listened to me sob and tell her why I was there being tested for STDs. She gave me a great pep talk and a hug. I truly felt better after that appointment, even though it was horribly embarrassing for me to have to be tested for STDs.

So, believe me-- good docs are worth their weight in gold. The students are lucky to have you.

(((pj4)))


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3621 | Registered: Oct 2011
WakingFromADream
♂ Member
Member # 33934
Default  Posted: 1:55 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((pj4))))


Me(35) XWW(36) DS(7) DD 11/16/11 EA(PA?) M 11y D 9/3/13

Don't make anyone a priority when you are only an option.


Posts: 1148 | Registered: Nov 2011
StillGoing
♂ Member
Member # 28571
Default  Posted: 2:00 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

A friend of mine got burned out doing that. He had a degree is psychology and some other related fields, but quit that and moved into IT instead after several years. I think what bothered him the most was the cavalier attitude of his colleagues and seniors though.

Most cheerful helpdesk guy ever.


"You have insulted my footwear."

Posts: 7488 | Registered: May 2010 | From: USA
authenticnow
♀ Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 2:01 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((((Purplejacket)))))

I coordinate a crisis hotline and there are days when I answer the calls and I realize how mental illness, depression, anxiety, etc., have such a profound effect on so many people. It is very, very sad.

[This message edited by authenticnow at 3:05 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday)]


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 38093 | Registered: Sep 2007
Jrazz
♀ Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 2:15 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((purplejacket4)))


Cherish those who seek the truth but beware of those who find it. - François-Marie Arouet

Posts: 17860 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
jo2love
♀ Moderator
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 2:55 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Purple)))

Thank you for helping all those students that are in need. You make a difference in their life.

Remember you rock!


Posts: 35933 | Registered: Mar 2011
InTheRabbitHole
♀ Member
Member # 19319
Default  Posted: 3:04 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

PJ, thank you for helping out these students. I had a rough go of it in university, I was raped and found out I had a pretty serious health issue. The medical team at the clinic probably kept me from doing something horrible to myself.

Please make sure you also take care of PJ! She's pretty special and needs to be looked after as well.


Posts: 202 | Registered: Apr 2008
sisoon
♂ Member
Member # 31240
Default  Posted: 3:07 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((purplejacket4)))

(signed) sisoon, a grad of a purple & white HS who suffers from the depredations of a purple & white university...


fBH (me) - 70 (22 in my head), fWW (plainsong) - 65+, Married 45+, together since 1965
DDay - 12/2010
Recovered, not yet fully R'ed
I share my own experience because it's the only experience I know, not because I'm a good model.

Posts: 10384 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: Chicago area
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 3:15 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((((((pj)))))))) 70,000 ears here for you.

Being the rock is exhausting stuff. Please take some time to clear yourself of the negativity however you can.

Sending strength and comfort to you, and mojo for the boards to your fWS.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25777 | Registered: Aug 2011
jrc1963
♀ Member
Member # 26531
Default  Posted: 3:44 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((PJ)))


Me: BSO - 46
Him: FWSO - 69
DS - 13
D-Day - 12-11-09,
R - he finally came home
Your life is an Occasion. Rise to it. - Mr. Magorium, "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium"

Posts: 24597 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Florida
sullymeishadomi
♀ Member
Member # 16305
Default  Posted: 4:51 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((((Purple))))))


People tell you exactly who they are...why expect them to be what they are not ....will be divorcing the selfish creep.

Posts: 8394 | Registered: Sep 2007
purplejacket4
♀ Member
Member # 34262
Default  Posted: 10:41 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks guys! I spent the evening teaching med students at the free clinic so that was fun. Too bad I had to come home to formally wandering grumpy cat I mean spouse!! Meow! I can't wait for her test to be over!


Me: BS 45
Her: fWS 48 (same sex partner)
Together: 18 years now (both MDs)
OW: meh so what 40s PhD
DD1: 10/30/11EA; DD2: 11/10/11 Had ONS; TT until 12/26/11; broke NC 6/12; NC again 7/12; R-ish

Posts: 2247 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: Great Southwest
caregiver9000
♀ Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 10:59 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((more hugs)))

rebuild the energy stores.


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5861 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
Kajem
♀ Member
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 11:19 PM, April 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

AS a mom to (presently) 3 college kids... and adding one in the fall.... THANK YOU for being there for these kids.

It really does ease this mommy's mind... just a bit to know that you are available to them.

Sending restful/peaceful/rejuvenating mojo your way... and test taking mojo to your partner.

Hugs,

K


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5284 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
Topic Posts: 20

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