Thank You Rivenheart and jjct. You're both right. I will be better off and I definitely dodged a lot of bullets. It will be 2 months from the day she told me tomorrow.
I made a list over the weekend of "The Reality of Being Married to My WW" I came up with 50 items rather quickly. All things I was dealing with in regards to her and all the needs I had that weren't being fulfilled.
I wanted a reference for when she comes back knocking on the door.
Now I also know from this list will come the things I need to work on so I don't find myself in relationships that repeat the same cycle.
I also in time need to explore what it is inside me that seeks out relationships with people who won't give me what I need and why I felt I didn't deserve better. This I have been doing in therapy.
Now I've just been in a daze that no amount of caffeine can stop. Still having bad dreams about my WW. I continue to feel that something was ripped out of me. Emotionally all over the place and definitely taking it hour by hour.
I picked up the book "How to survive the loss of a love" which has been really helpful.
Have another massage this week and trying to stay busy doing nothing in particular.
Thank You all for replying and giving me advice. It has helped me immensely.