You have to put your foot down. He is playing games.

On dday I told my H "Your whores may be willing to share you with me but I will never (knowingly) share my H with another woman". I meant every word and he knew it.

In your shoes I would pack his gear, phone her and tell her she can have him.. I would definitely ask her about the herpes. (But that's me ). Then have all his stuff delivered to her house. Make sure it includes his dirty laundry.

Then when he gets home tell him that you told her he is all hers so you thought you'd help him pack.

If you continue to let him gaslight you he will keep doing it. Having said all that I really am so sorry honey.

BIG HUGS

Laura

You know what this - why are you waiting for "the truth" from him? Rhetorical, really - I waited until he actually admitted it too.

After DD my boundaries were muh firmer. What I was asking was not that difficult. HE was risking ending our M to maintain female friendships.

He too tried to gaslight me with the same bullshit "you're willlin to risk our M because I have female friends??".

WRONG. I was not risking attempting R or even having a relationship with someone who crossed my boundaries. Namely, you you moron.

Gaslighting is SUPPOSED to make you feel crazy. It stops when you say it stops.

You don't need proof if sex to walk away. This blatant disregard is more than enough.

Get off the crazy train.